EresNerd

nieman
Got a hankerin’ for authentic Mexican tamales made with stone ground corn, top quality meats, lard, spices and natural flavoring?

How would you like those little “Mexican power bars” delivered to your door all frozen and stuff? Got $110? There are three colors to choose from, all for just under $20 a pound!

Here’s your link, sucker. [Mas…]

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I spotted a car full of foreigners from Canadia in El Paso Sunday. Do you think they’re here to smuggle in more sketchy refugee families — families like Ma and Pa and Ted Cruz?

mascotheaderComic artist Axur Eneas created a series of illustrations of videogame gear, characters, mascots, logos, icons, and glyphs for a gamer convention in Mexico DF. We captioned them all for your nerdy geeky pleasure.

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Botas picudas (pointy boots) and shitty “tribal” music are the highlights of this campaign video for candidato del PAN Diego Leyva por el distrito 1 en Guanajuato.

PREVIOUSLY ON GUANAJUATO: [Mas…]

barackonDespite the his many significant accomplishments and chingon new proposals, we were disappointed by what President Obama didn’t say at Tuesday night’s State of the Union address.

Here are the Pocho Ocho top reasons Obama’s SOTU gave us a sad:

8. Still no federal funding for Flying Trocas research.

7. Didn’t announce plan to make Ted Cruz first U.S. ambassador to Cuba.

6. No tax cuts for tamale entrepreneurs, thus no Pedro Herrera III in the audience to give a shout out to. [Mas…]

lalosign(PNS reporting HOUSTON) Lalo’s Cocina Bar & Grill here will be serving special New Year’s Day breakfasts to early risers going to Mass and partiers winding down from New Year’s Eve, but that’s not the whole estory. [Mas…]

Welcome to Texas! Ride ’em, cowboy, and/or adjust your junk (photo)

by EresNerd September 24, 2014 Las Fotos
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In Freer, Texas, those vehicle rear window decals can get confusing.

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Robin Williams reads Pablo Neruda’s ‘Sonnet XVII’ (video)

by EresNerd August 13, 2014 Cultura
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In the film Patch Adams, Hunter “Patch” Adams — played by the late Robin Williams — “commits himself into a mental institution. Once there, he finds that using humor to help his fellow inmates gives him a purpose in life….” Sonnet XVII By Pablo Neruda I don’t love you as if you were a rose […]

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Reality check at the Sierra Blanca, Texas border checkpoint (video)

by EresNerd August 5, 2014 El Now
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At the Sierra Blanca, Texas, border checkpoint, even La MIGRA has realized that immigrants have rights. PREVIOUSLY ON THE BORDER:

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Want to save the planet? All the cool Mayans ride bikes (toon)

by EresNerd August 1, 2014 Cartoons
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Image via Metzican. PREVIOUSLY ON MAYANS AND AZTECS AND OLMECS, OH MY:

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Bienvenido a Texas. Hablamos Spanglish

by EresNerd July 29, 2014 Cultura
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Lisa Lisa/Cult Jam: I Wonder If I Take You Home (video)

by EresNerd March 21, 2014 Cultura
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Lisa Lisa and Cult Jam is an iconic Latino group.  At the forefront of “freestyle,” Lisa Velez fronted the group, which released the album Lisa Lisa & Cult Jam with Full Force. 

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To dream the impossible dream (photo)

by EresNerd March 3, 2014 Cultura
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Man disappointed with ‘What Selena Character are You?’ quiz result

by EresNerd February 21, 2014 El Now
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(PNS reporting from SAN ANTONIO) During his morning coffee break, local accountant, Lawrence “Lencho” Flores, completed a survey that appeared on his Facebook timeline called, What Selena Character are You? According to sources, Flores was deeply disappointed with the result of Yolanda Saldivar as his character. According to the quiz, Flores is Yolanda Saldivar who […]

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Modern Day Classics: Lighter Shade of Brown, Latin Active

by EresNerd February 21, 2014 Cultura
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Lighter Shade of Brown is an iconic group for Latino Hip-Hop.  The Southern California duo of Robert Gutierrez and Bobby Ramirez entered into the Chicano consciousness in 1990 with their album, Brown and Proud. Featuring the singles, On a Sunday Afternoon and Latin Active, the album is a modern day classic.

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Mijo, these Tenis are nice, pero solamante uso Botas

by Apá January 24, 2014 Cultura
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Dear Mijo: Muchas gracias for the regalos de mi Cumple! I thought the libros were great. Is this the book about that show on HBO con los lobos? We don’t watch HBO much porque tu Mom sees her Novelas y esa muchacha Rachel Maddow. Se enoja after watching her program. Va hacer volunteer con la […]

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Construction Zone: Must wear hard hat and mustache (photo)

by EresNerd December 19, 2013 Cultura
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¡Peligro! ¡Bigote! From two years ago, photographer and location unknown, found on Imgur PREVIOUSLY ON BIGOTE/MUSTACHE:

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Bad Accent Video Theatre: ‘El Amor de Mi Amante’ (My Lover’s Love)

by EresNerd December 5, 2013 Cultura
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Student film? Bad Accent Video Theatre? Whatever! El Amor de Mi Amante is mini-telenovela brought to you by Taco Bell and this year’s hottest new fragrance — Twist! PREVIOUSLY ON BAD SPANISH ACCENT VIDEO THEATRE:

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Emiliano Zapata gets a new look in ‘Revolución’ (NSFW toon)

by EresNerd November 25, 2013 Cartoons
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Mexican revolutionary hero Emiliano Zapata shows off his new look in an oil painting posted on Facebook by artist Cahirez Ch. Must be something in the air! Frida Kahlo just got a makeover too. PREVIOUSLY ON EMILIANO ZAPATA:

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Trail cam in Maine captures mystery Chimichanga beast? (photo)

by EresNerd November 22, 2013 El Now
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Did a trail cam in Bangor, Maine photograph the elusive, mythical goat-sucking Mexican monster known as the Chimichanga? That’s the question on the front page of the Bangor Daily News. It’s not a typo, according JimRomenesko.com:

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Area couple survives loud radio station promo van at grocery store

by EresNerd November 21, 2013 El Now
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(PNS reporting from EDINBURG, TX)  They just about went deaf, but Alcario and Isela Garza braved a radio station’s sonic assault and managed to safely enter the Rancho Sinaloa grocery store here yesterday. The Garzas — who had just left their yoga class — entered the relatively-quiet food market after surviving 150 decibels of banda […]

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Mom puts cross on son’s front lawn to mark another failed relationship

by EresNerd October 14, 2013 El Now
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(PNS reporting from HOUSTON) Sara Maestas placed a two-foot-high cruz on her only son’s lawn early this morning — a cross in remembrance of his latest failed relationship. The 32-year-old transactional lawyer got dumped Saturday night by his novia, less than 20 minutes after he blew off a dinner date. And now his mother’s white […]

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[Breaking] Back to School: Boys named ‘José’ get new names

by EresNerd September 5, 2013 El Now
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(PNS reporting from SAN ANTONIO) All across America, elementary school teachers performed a traditional back-to-school ritual this week — the ceremonial renaming of thousands of boys named “José.” The annual ritual is performed when teachers take roll in the morning: First, teachers call the boys named “José” by new “American” names, typically “Joe,” “Joey,” or […]

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Breaking: TX boy, 9, slays Mexican boogeyman El Cucuy, 521

by EresNerd August 14, 2013 El Now
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(PNS reporting from SEGUIN, TX) A nine-year-old boy killed El Cucuy Tuesday night. El Cucuy, AKA the Mexican Boogeyman, was pronounced dead at 10:30 PM at the Balli family residence here.  The legendary monster was said to be 521, with a birth date pegged in 1492. It was a more or less typical evening for the […]

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