(PNS reporting from MEXICO CITY) Leading Catholic personalities gathered here this week to address a simmering controversy in the official Divine Advent & Manifestation Union (DAMU): members claim that La Virgen de Guadalupe (photo, center) is a publicity hog when it comes to miraculous appearances.
“Can’t the Son of God just miraculously appear on a slice of toast without someone copying me?” asked Jesus Christ (photo, right). “Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for faith and everything, but she goes out of her way to appear on everything! Am I right, people?”
Another virgin in attendance, rarely-seen La Virgen de San Juan (photo, left), said that although she’s “totally cool” with being a lesser-known virgin, she will never be able to grow her Twitter following or sell more CDs when Guadalupe is always “hogging the spotlight.”
“The union has rules for a reason, so everyone has a chance at appearing on tortillas or an oil stain,” San Juan told PNS. “I don’t expect to be number one — I mean, c’mon, we’re talking about the Mother of God here — but I do expect my fair share.” [Mas…]
Ughhhhhhhh. There goes another crazy Texas politico saying something crazy. This time it’s Austin City Councilman Don Zimmerman, who told a group of Latino parents and students who testified in front of the council, some in Spanish, to stop being moochers (basically). [Mas…]
Artist Ana Smile has people all offended in Brazil, but she thinks they need to just chill.
Dangerous Minds reports: [Mas…]
At Stew Leonard’s, guacamole is its own ingredient — just add kale!
This the beginning of the end of the American middle class.
Stew’s Chunky Guacamole is prepared fresh daily by our culinary team with whole avocados, tomatoes, red onions, jalapeno peppers, a dash of salt, and a splash of freshly squeezed lime juice…. Plus, new for 2015, is Stew’s Kalemole, which is the addition of shredded kale to our traditional Chunky Guacamole!
Wine Pairing: Alto Vuelo Sauvignon Blanc — The citrusy, grapefruit component of this wine will pair nicely with the tangy, creaminess of the Guacamole and or the Kale Guacamole
PREVIOUSLY ON EXOTIC GUACAMOLE: [Mas…]
(PNS reporting from EAST LOS) Ruben Covarrubias astounded family and friends here Sunday night when he admitted that the history of Cinco de Mayo didn’t concern him and he’d always thought “May 5 was Mexican Independence Day, so like so what?!”
“I don’t care what it’s about, yo!” he told everyone within earshot of the backyard grill. “I just always celebrated it with MEChA and at school. Partay!”
Friends and family at the Covarrubias’ weekly carne asada were aghast. Some reconsidered whether they’d be driving back to El Sereno next week, multiple witness reported. [Mas…]
(PNS reporting from HOUSTON) Julio Reyes wanted a beach body shape this Summer, but after weighing changing his diet, swapping soda for water and committing to a strenuous of weights and cardio, he reconsidered.
“I think I’m just going to wear my t-shirt with my swim trunks this year,” he told PNS. “That way, if my workout regimen doesn’t kick in ‘til later no one will notice.” [Mas…]