Post image for PNS*Hot*Flash: California Gov. Jerry Brown bans big burritos

PNS*Hot*Flash: California Gov. Jerry Brown bans big burritos

by Comic Saenz on April 15, 2013 in El Now, Pocho Ñews Service

(PNS reporting from SACRAMENTO) Repeating his “small is beautiful” mantra from the 1970s, California Gov. Jerry Brown has taken steps to ban burritos that weigh more than one pound.

“We’re facing an obesity epidemic in the Golden State,” Brown told a press conference here this morning, “and I wouldn’t be the guy who shtupped Latina Linda Ronstadt back in the day if I didn’t travel to the beat of a different drum.”

Brown has issued an executive order directing inspectors from Cal/OSHA (the California Occupational Hazard and Safety Administration) to cite and penalize restaurants that serve massive San Francisco-style “Mission burritos.”

“Also, how can we hope to stop global warming and air pollution when people are farting out two pounds of frijoles after lonche?” he asked.

“Yo mama is so fat that she has more chins than the phonebook in Chinatown!” he added.

Actual gigantor burrito photo courtesy Mexikosher.

POCHO ÑEWS SERVICE PNS IS A WHOLLY-FICTITIOUS SUBSIDIARY OF POCHISMO INC., A CALIFORNIA CORPORATION, WHO IS A PERSON ACCORDING TO THE SUPREME COURT. DON’T ASK US, WE JUST WORK HERE.

Previous post:

Next post: