battle of puebla

Yesterday, mijo ask me gwhy peoples celebrate the Cinco de Mayo.

“Is because of the Battle of Puebla,” I tole him.

“Do people in Mexico get borrachos and crazy like they do here in the United States?”

“Crazy? No. The kids get day off from eschool and then some mens dresses up in the pueblo of Puebla and play like is the battle happening again.”

“No crazy borrachos?”

“No, is more like kids eating candy and washing TV.”

“Is it about Mexican people being proud of their culture?”

“No,” I say. “I’m no proud of gringos gwearing sombreros and eating chimichangas.”

“Are chimichangas Mexican?”

“I don know. I never ate one,” I say. “But the gringos love to eat the food with all the cheez I don know what it is.” [Mas…]

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pueblacartel640(PNS reporting from PUEBLA, MX) Federales have finished cleaning up the streets of this southeastern city after a three-day battle between area gangsters and a French gang left 83 locals and 462 gabachos dead, PNS has learned.

The  Marseilles gang (“La Eme”) — sent to collect a drug debt allegedly owed by the Puebla-based Ignacio Zaragosa clika (the “Zetas”) — was overwhelmed by the fierce Mexican gangbangers.

Faulty HUMINT (human intelligence) was also a factor.

Based on bogus tips from informants who called themselves “los mentirosos,” which La Eme interpreted as “mentors,” the frogs engaged the enemy at noon. La Eme expected the Zeta sentries to be taking siestas with their sombreros pulled so low they couldn’t see the advancing gunmen. And the close-by burros? The French plan relied on the overhwhelming odor of naturally estanky donkeys to mask the telltale scent of French breath-de-fromage.

But the Zetas were not asleep and those weren’t your mother’s burritos. [Mas…]

cucacinco [Mas…]

(PNS reporting from the EEUU) Tex-Mex restaurants across the country are banding together this week to ensure the flawed traditions of margaritas, sombreros, maracas, bastardized Mexican food and overall cultural cluelessness are again propagated upon masses of uninformed Americans this Cinco De Mayo. [Mas…]


5-Second Films is all about explaining things in 5 seconds, like their 5-second video The History of Cinco de Mayo.

chipssalsaWhite folks in sombreros and serapes. Spanglish beer commercials every few minutes. Yup, pretty ridiculous, señor.

I agree with most of my friend Gustavo Arellano’s Cinco de Mayo video rant, mas o menos.

He says it’s ridiculous, only serves some limited purposes as far as educating about the evils of Imperialism, or the promotion of self-determination, y todo eso. Battle of Puebla my ear. Sure. OK, guey.

However, I think Gustavo misses one big fat Manuel’s El Tepeyac Hollenbeck Burrito-sized point:

We’ve got to celebrate with the holidays we have,
not the holidays we want

[Mas…]

Me? Today I’m drinking a cerveza and contemplating Cinco de Mayo

by ABELARDO DE LA PEÑA JR. May 5, 2016 Cultura
Thumbnail image for Me? Today I’m drinking a cerveza and contemplating Cinco de Mayo

I approach el Cinco de Mayo with excitement and ambivalence. I learned the history of the Battle of Puebla as the son of proud Mexicans, who happened to be immigrants. The story goes: On the fifth of May 1862, a small Mexican army kicks French butt. Bueno. My dad and grandmother worked at the Cinco […]

[Mas…]

In Puebla, MX, narco cartel killers crush French gangsters

by Comic Saenz May 5, 2016 El Now
Thumbnail image for In Puebla, MX, narco cartel killers crush French gangsters

(PNS reporting from PUEBLA, MX) Federales have finished cleaning up the streets of this southeastern city after a three-day battle between area gangsters and a French gang left 83 locals and 462 gabachos dead, PNS has learned. The  Marseilles gang (“La Eme”) — sent to collect a drug debt allegedly owed by the Puebla-based Ignacio Zaragosa clika […]

[Mas…]

La Cucaracha contemplates Cinco de Mayo with two vintage toons

by Lalo Alcaraz May 3, 2016 Cartoons
Thumbnail image for La Cucaracha contemplates Cinco de Mayo with two vintage toons
[Mas…]

Breaking Ñews: Did French troops use poison gas in Puebla?

by EDUARDO BURRO May 3, 2016 Cultura
Thumbnail image for Breaking Ñews: Did French troops use poison gas in Puebla?

(PNS reporting from MEXICO CITY) French invaders fighting indigenous militias in the state of Puebla are using poison gas, according to situation reports circulating here in the capital. If the reports can be substantiated, it marks a dangerous escalation in the hostilities, and would mean Napoleon III’s troops have “crossed a red line” set by […]

[Mas…]

La Cucaracha: It’s almost time for Cinco de Mayo (toon)

by Lalo Alcaraz May 2, 2016 Cartoons
Thumbnail image for La Cucaracha: It’s almost time for Cinco de Mayo (toon)
[Mas…]

Orale! It’s the Yeb Bush Cinco de Drinko Game (video)

by Celina Martinez May 5, 2015 Cultura

Many politically conscious Chicanos are looking for yet another alternative way to Celebrate Cinco de Drinko but still protest the ahistorical consumer appropriation of a battle that is meaningless to most Mexicans. Well, Jeb Bush (aka el Yeb according to his Mexican compadres) has provided us with a warm video message of solidarity this Fifth […]

[Mas…]

La Cucaracha Contemplates Cinco de Mayo con dos toons

by Lalo Alcaraz May 5, 2015 Cartoons
Thumbnail image for La Cucaracha Contemplates Cinco de Mayo con dos toons
[Mas…]

Discovery! ‘Lost’ French tribe found in painted cave near Puebla, MX

by Victor Payan May 4, 2015 Cultura
Thumbnail image for Discovery! ‘Lost’ French tribe found in painted cave near Puebla, MX

(PNS reporting from MEXICO) Mexican researchers are baffled by the discovery of a lost tribe of Frenchmen living in an artfully-decorated cave in the foothills of Mt. Popocatépetl in the state of Puebla. The Frenchmen, found by a group of hikers, are believed to be descended from a military patrol that went missing in 1862, during the French […]

[Mas…]

Me? I’m drinking a cerveza and contemplating Cinco de Mayo

by ABELARDO DE LA PEÑA JR. May 1, 2015 Cultura
Thumbnail image for Me? I’m drinking a cerveza and contemplating Cinco de Mayo

I approach el Cinco de Mayo with excitement and ambivalence. I learned the history of the Battle of Puebla as the son of proud Mexicans, who happened to be immigrants. The story goes: On the fifth of May 1862, a small Mexican army kicks French butt. Bueno. My dad and grandmother worked at the Cinco […]

[Mas…]

La Cucaracha: The actual true story of Cinco de Mayo (2001 toon)

by Lalo Alcaraz May 5, 2014 Cartoons
Thumbnail image for La Cucaracha: The actual true story of Cinco de Mayo (2001 toon)
[Mas…]

PochOpinion: Here’s what I thinko about Cinco

by Lalo Alcaraz May 5, 2014 Cultura
Thumbnail image for PochOpinion: Here’s what I thinko about Cinco

White folks in sombreros and serapes. Spanglish beer commercials every few minutes. Yup, pretty ridiculous, señor. I agree with most of my friend Gustavo Arellano’s Cinco de Mayo video rant, mas o menos. He says it’s ridiculous, only serves some limited purposes as far as educating about the evils of Imperialism, or the promotion of self-determination, […]

[Mas…]

Tribe of lost French people found living in cave near Puebla, MX

by Victor Payan May 5, 2014 Cultura
Thumbnail image for Tribe of lost French people found living in cave near Puebla, MX

(PNS reporting from MEXICO) Mexican researchers are baffled by the discovery of a lost tribe of Frenchmen living in an artfully-decorated cave in the foothills of Mt. Popocatépetl in the state of Puebla. The Frenchmen, found by a group of hikers, are believed to be descended from a military patrol that went missing in 1862, during the French […]

[Mas…]

It’s beginning to look a lot like Cinco…in Brentwood, California (toon)

by Lalo Alcaraz May 2, 2014 Cartoons
Thumbnail image for It’s beginning to look a lot like Cinco…in Brentwood, California (toon)

They celebrate every year, usually on the fifth day in May. Brentwood? Where? What? Huh?

[Mas…]

Here’s what I thinko about Cinco

by Lalo Alcaraz May 5, 2013 Cultura
Thumbnail image for Here’s what I thinko about Cinco

White folks in sombreros and serapes. Spanglish beer commercials every few minutes. Yup, pretty ridiculous, señor. I agree with most of my friend Gustavo Arellano’s roiling denunciation of Cinco de Mayo, mas o menos. He says it’s ridiculous, only serves some limited purposes as far as educating about the evils of Imperialism, or the promotion of […]

[Mas…]

I’m drinking a cerveza and contemplating Cinco de Mayo

by ABELARDO DE LA PEÑA JR. May 3, 2013 Cultura
Thumbnail image for I’m drinking a cerveza and contemplating Cinco de Mayo

I approach el Cinco de Mayo with excitement and ambivalence. I learned the history of the Battle of Puebla as the son of proud Mexicans, who happened to be immigrants. The story goes: On the fifth of May 1862, a small Mexican army kicks French butt. Bueno. My dad and grandmother worked at the Cinco […]

[Mas…]

Breaking: Mexican troops say French use poison gas in Puebla

by EDUARDO BURRO May 1, 2013 Cultura
Thumbnail image for Breaking: Mexican troops say French use poison gas in Puebla

(PNS reporting from MEXICO CITY) French invaders fighting indigenous militias in the state of Puebla are using poison gas, according to situation reports circulating here in the capital. If the reports can be substantiated, it marks a dangerous escalation in the hostilities, and would mean Napoleon III’s troops have “crossed a red line” set by […]

[Mas…]

It’s beginning to look a lot like Cinco…in Brentwood, CA (toon)

by Lalo Alcaraz May 1, 2013 Cartoons
Thumbnail image for It’s beginning to look a lot like Cinco…in Brentwood, CA (toon)

They celebrate every year, usually on the fifth day in May. Brentwood? Huh?

[Mas…]

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: History and margaritas for Cinco de Mayo (video)

by POTEMQUIN ESTEPS May 4, 2012 Cultura
Thumbnail image for Tia Lencha’s Cocina: History and margaritas for Cinco de Mayo (video)

Your favorite tia, Tia Lencha, makes margaritas and offers a side order of history lessons in this special Cinco de Mayo video, her first. Tia is assisted by her son, Mysterious E. There’s more Tia Lencha below:

[Mas…]