This is why they hate us: The Hamilton-Beach breakfast burrito maker

hbscreencapMaking a breakfast burrito is hard work, especially in the morning when it’s time to eat breakfast. There’s the delicate cracking of the eggs thang, the slicing of the cheese procedure, the tricky cooking and not burning, and finally the delicate assembly work. All in the morning! Maybe even before the cafecito kicks in! Aye dios mio! What’s a hungry pocho to do?

Chillax, homie, We’ve got your modern gadget right here: The new Breakfast Burrito Maker from Hamilton-Beach, your favorite manufacturer of stupid single-use appliances.

Mas…This is why they hate us: The Hamilton-Beach breakfast burrito maker

The Easter Story: Why advertising to Hispanics sucks balls* [Updated]

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By BERNADETTE RIVERO

Technically, the word I should have used above, in the headline, is “Manipulates.” As in, “Safely Manipulate Your Balls When You Celebrate!”

That’s what the Federal Drug Administration advises this season, anyway. (Screen capture, above.)

But I’m a writer who has spent a lifetime in both advertising and journalism, and I know the value of good clickbait when I have it in my hands.

Er… Line of sight. Sorry, I’m distracted by the FDA advising me to fondle one’s nether regions for Easter.

Mas…The Easter Story: Why advertising to Hispanics sucks balls* [Updated]

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: How ju make chilaquiles for the World Cup

chilaquilesHello. Is Tia Lencha here. I haves the World Cup feber. Do ju?

Is the feber ju get from watching the World Cups and being so mad at the referees and Holland and wonder who put brujeria on Brazil, that ju want to hit the telebision with a cuchara from the kishen. But I watch the games anyways.

The only gway I can watch the games now is to drink some micheladas to make me want to hit the telebision less times. So today I tell ju how to make chilaquiles to go with the beers that ju need in order to watch the games of the third place and the finals this week.

First the ingrediens: