futbol

(PNS reporting from MEXICO CITY)  Mexico is throwing in the towel — and picking up a broom — after Club America’s humiliating defeat to Toronto FC in the CONCACAF Champions League semi-final Tuesday night.  The loss signaled the death of the country’s storied soccer tradition.

After the 4-2 aggregate defeat, club officials for the Mexico City-based team said the result left little choice but to seek other options for a new national sport. [Mas…]

univisiononionNow that UNIVISION has become a part owner of The Onion, our media analysts have compiled the Pocho Ocho top changes you can expect from the new corporation:

8. Daily stories tagged #TelemundoFail

7. Don Francisco’s triumphant return to TV as Area Man

6. Univision closes failing millennial-oriented website The Cilantro [Mas…]

THREESHOTYou’re passionate, Mr. and/or Ms. Hispanic, and emotional. You like stories, and web video stories under one minute long especially. Do we have some stories for you! Also tacos, which all Hispanics love, futbol ditto, and la musica, piñatas and burros tambien. HEY! WHAT ABOUT SPICY? [Mas…]

Goodriddance


Dire Straits’ hit Sultans of Swing filled the air in Sao Paolo, Brazil, last week. This guy rocks!

Pocho Ocho top reasons for Brazil vs Alemania futbol FAIL

by Especial Correspondents July 10, 2014 El Now
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Tuesday’s disastrous Brazil-Germany FIFA2014 World Cup futbol match, which ended in Germany whipping the host country 7-1, has saddened the nation (photo.) And on Wednesday, Brazil’s soccer fans were struggling to understand what exactly went wrong. We analyzed press and social media reactions and translated from the Portuguese to bring you their Pocho Ocho top […]

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Tia Lencha’s Cocina: How ju make chilaquiles for the World Cup

by TIA LENCHA July 9, 2014 Cultura
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Hello. Is Tia Lencha here. I haves the World Cup feber. Do ju? Is the feber ju get from watching the World Cups and being so mad at the referees and Holland and wonder who put brujeria on Brazil, that ju want to hit the telebision with a cuchara from the kishen. But I watch […]

[Mas…]

La Cucaracha: Goal! vs ¡GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL! (toon)

by Lalo Alcaraz July 2, 2014 Cartoons
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Watch: In Brazil, one fútbol fan floats some social criticism

by Especial Correspondents July 2, 2014 Cultura
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How’s your Portuguese? The LiveLeak uploader says this high-tech balsero is yelling “Why do we need hospitals, roads, schools and public security if we have the World Cup? Give [me] my beer to enjoy this shit!”

[Mas…]

Brazil: Topless body builder futbol fans flex for the camera

by Verdana Bold June 30, 2014 Cultura
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Futbol fans went topless to flaunt their ripped torsos for the camera and World Cup FIFA Fan Fest crowds in Sao Paolo Saturday.

[Mas…]

America’s love of futbol is a ‘sign of moral decay’ (toon)

by Lalo Alcaraz June 27, 2014 Cartoons
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PREVIOUSLY ON SOCCER:

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‘Mexican Elephant’ loves futbol, so TGIF and ‘Shabbat Shalom’ (video)

by Comic Saenz June 27, 2014 Cultura
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We don’t know why this video is called Mexican Elephant, or why the commentary is in Hebrew, since we think this footage was shot in Thailand. Nevertheless, we agree with the announcer: Shabbat Shalom! !שַׁבָּת שָׁלוֹם

[Mas…]

Area futbol fans celebrate El Tri’s 3-1 victory over Croatia (photo)

by Especial Correspondents June 25, 2014 Cultura
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(PNS reporting from HUNTINGTON PARK, CALIFAS) Hundreds of local athletic supporters — fans of the Mexican World Cup futbol team — celebrated El Tri’s 3-1 victory over Croatia Monday afternoon (photo, above). The celebration was mostly peaceful and Huntington Park police said only four fans were arrested — three for disorderly conduct and one for […]

[Mas…]

Brazil TV guy tries to punk Mexicans with extra-picante salsa (video)

by MOSCA MEXICAN June 24, 2014 Cultura
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When a Brazilian TV guy tries to prank visiting Mexican futbol fans with what he thinks is super-spicy salsa, it turns out the joke is actually on him. What’s uber picante in Brazil, tu sabes, ranks as “meh” to Mexicanos. One intended victim actually thinks Brazil-boy’s salsa is kind of “sweet.” PREVIOUSLY ON SALSA:

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MexiCanada: Montreal mayor fights poutine burritos – ‘pou-tos’

by Malcolm Mex June 23, 2014 Cultura
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(PNS reporting from MONTREAL, QUEBEC) Authorities here are scrambling to halt the spread of a Mexicanized version of poutine, Canada’s beloved national dish of French fries covered with gravy and cheese. The increasingly-popular poutine burrito, known as a “pou-to” or “poutito” (photo, above) has already swept through Montreal, and officials fear “pou-tos” will cross the Quebec provincial […]

[Mas…]

Is Spanish-language TV futbol play-by-play racist? (audio)

by Especial Correspondents June 23, 2014 Audio
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When American Latinos watch Spanish-langugage FIFA broadcasts from Brazil, some are shocked by the casual use of words like “greña” and “moreno” that would be considered offensive in the U.S. This report from Public Radio International explores the controversy: PREVIOUSLY ON SPANISH TV:

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¡Ask A Mexican! Is yelling ‘puto’ at futbol homophobic? (NSFW video)

by Comic Saenz June 20, 2014 Cultura
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Gustavo ¡Ask A Mexican! Arellano continues on his World Cup kick with a discussion of the Mexican team’s performance in their tied match with Brazil and the spectators’ habit of calling the opposing team putos. [NSFW adult language.] P.S.: Spoiler warning: You may be a puto if….

[Mas…]

Overdub, multi window madness: Brazil, the musical (video)

by MOON GUAC June 20, 2014 Cultura
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YouTuber Dan Newbie plays bottles, pans, pots and salt shakers, overdubs his nalgas off, and runs through a bunch of Brazil-oriented tunes, the better to World Cup you with, my dear. PREVIOUSLY ON BRAZIL:

[Mas…]

Mexico-Brazil fútbol generates an F-bomb on Irish TV (NSFW video)

by Moctezuma Cortés June 19, 2014 El Now
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Inspired by L.A. Mayor Eric Garcetti’s L.A Kings F-bomb on live TV, on-the-air sports presenters in Ireland dropped the bomb during halftime of Tuesday’s Mexico-Brazil match. [NSFW adult language if someone there at your job can understand the thick Irish brogues. It’s more like “fookin” or something.]

[Mas…]

USMNT scores against Ghana, Times Square reacts [video]

by Especial Correspondents June 16, 2014 El Now
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(PNS reporting From NEW YORK CITY) The Jumbotron in Times Square in New Jack City flashes news of a   g o o o o a l   by USMNT forward Herculez Gomez in World Cup competition against Ghana and Manhattan passersby react as only New Yorkers can.

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Don’t worry, Mexico, El Brujo Mayor fixed the World Cup (video)

by ROD ESTERLING June 12, 2014 Doomsday Countdown
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Antonio Vazquez Alba, popularly known as the the Grand Warlock of Mexico, is working his magic on the World Cup, cursing opposing teams and clearing the way for a victory by Mexico. El Brujo Mayor’s track record in influencing and predicting world events is unsurpassed; he famously predicted President Obama would not be reelected to […]

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Everyone wins a World Cup of Everything Else (infographics)

by ALBERTO SOLAPIEDRA June 12, 2014 Cartoons
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If there were a World Cup for the Highest Percentage of Middle-Aged Unmarried Women Between 45 and 49, Brazil would win! ¡Ole! In the World Cup for the Futbol Team with the Most Twitter Followers, the winner is Selección Mexicana, @miseleccionmx on the Tuiter:

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Latinos y gringos in Buenos Aires? Eat tacos, watch futbol here (video)

by MOSCA MEXICAN June 11, 2014 Audio
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Attention assorted Latinos and gringos: Are you stuck in Buenos Aires far away from home when you’d rather be watching the World Cup with your amigos? Come on down to La Fábrica del Taco (LFDT) at either Gorriti 5062 Palermo or Baez 246 Cañitas for comida, cerveza and futbol! Maybe you’ll miss home a little […]

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