Former Arizona Governor Jan Brewja is predicting Donald Trump will win in the Hate State elections because Latinos won’t vote.
“Nah,” Brewer said in an interview with the Boston Globe. “They don’t get out and vote. They don’t vote.”
What else does she foresee? Here are her Pocho Ocho Mas Loco Predictions:
8. Pigs will fly.
7. When nasty women stop provoking the average guy with slutty clothes, rapes will stop.
6. If regulators approve the AT&T-Time Warner merger, the cable guy will actually arrive between 10am and 2pm. [Mas…]
Maricopa County Arizona $heriff Joe Arpaio is in big legal trouble and is asking supporters to help.
Arpaio said he doesn’t have the money for attorneys, adding that he feels “targeted” by the immigration rights groups that have sued him to stop what they say are racist policies targeting Latinos, according to the Los Angeles Times. [Mas…]
(PNS reporting from TUCSON) Cesar Chavez — noted American farm worker, labor leader and civil rights activist — is back from the dead and running for the congressional seat being vacated by retiring Rep. Ed Pastor (D-AZ).
“I will do just about anything to win in Arizona’s heavily Hispanic 7th Congressional District,” Chavez said in a press release, “including rising from the grave if that’s what it takes.”
A Chavez spokesman said the newly-registered Democratic candidate (until recently a two-time Republican loser) had been “flooded with calls” and was no longer speaking to the press, but if he did decide to answer questions, he would not discuss how he came back from the dead or what the afterlife is like. [Mas…]
Arizona Governor Jan Brewer won’t run again, she announced Wednesday, but said her retirement as governor won’t put an end to her dreams.
“A mule is an animal with long funny ears,” she told an audience at a school in Glendale, AZ, “she kicks up at anything she hears. Her back is brawny and her brain is weak, she’s just plain stupid with a stubborn streak. So when I walk out of this school, I’ll still remain a stupid mule.”
There are Pocho Ocho items on her bucket list, Brewja said:
8. Realize her dream of starting a clothing optional retreat with Sheriff Joe Arpaio
7. Spend more time with her coven
6. Convince George Lucas to cast her as Evil Yoda in the next Star Wars movie [Mas…]
Behold, The Hectors©, bestowed for Excellence in Mockability.
The Hectors© are named for POCHO Jefe-in-Chief Lalo Alcaraz’ cousin Hector (photo), who is excellent at ruining family gatherings, especially when he has downed his third 12-pack. He hasn’t seen a film since Blood In, Blood Out.
And the Hector© goes to: