maricopa

Screen Shot 2014-02-18 at 8.10.28 AM(PNS reporting from MARICOPA COUNTY) In a breaking development on a story first reported by POCHO in 2012, packs of wild Chihuahuas have taken over and are terrorizing a small town in Maricopa County, AZ.

The roving bands of pint-sized pooches have residents mortified, primarily because locals are afraid of anything remotely Mexican. Officials agree that the dogs’ bark is worse than their bite, however, there is one factor that has locals up in arms about this mini “ruff-conquista.”

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cacaprotest(PNS reporting from RANCHO POCHO, CA) With defiant shouts of “Don’t Cauc me, bro!” and “Chechnya? I just metchnya!” dozens of Caucasian-Americans filled the corners of city parks and the edges of town squares across the Nation Sunday to protest what they call “illegal racial profiling” against Caucasians.

The identification of two Caucasian-American suspects in the Boston Marathon bombings has resulted in both nasty words and police harassment, they claim. [Mas…]

(PNS reporting from PHOENIX) The media may question the newly-elected pontiff’s ethnicity, but Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio firmly believes that Pope Francis is Latino.

“His real name is Jorge and he speaks Spanish. I’m damn sure he is a Latino; he’s probably a Mexican, ” Arpaio told the monthly breakfast meeting of the Sons of the Arizona Indian Wars Wednesday.
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Que lastima!

Someone estole Sheriff Joe Arpaio’s identity and used his name to purchase groceries in Chicago. The Maricopa, AZ sheriff, unlike the pochodores here in the POCHO ñewsroom, was not amused.

We have a lot of things we’d like to purchase with Sheriff Joe’s moneh, and here are the top eight:

8. Taco USA by POCHO amigo Gustavo ¡Ask A Mexican! Arellano
7. ¡Ban This! by POCHO Florida Burro Jefe Santino J. Rivera
6. 2013 Good Luck Cartoon Calendar by POCHO Jefe Lalo Alcaraz [Mas…]

(PNS reporting from ARIZONA) The 10-year-old at Frank Elementary School in Guadalupe who got arrested Tuesday learned a valuable lesson about Sheriff Joe Arpaio and celebrity deputy Steven Seagal:

Don’t fuck with them.

According to the sheriff’s office, the boy had planned to beat one of his classmates at the Maricopa County school with a Wiffle Ball® bat but ended up on the wrong end of Steven Seagal’s sealskin boots instead.

Maricopa County Sheriff’s Office detectives were called to the elementary school by officials who were learned of the plot and found the student in possession of a tattered Wiffle Ball® bat. [Mas…]

Top Pendejos of 2012: AZ’s Gov. Jan Brewer and Sheriff Joe Arpaio

by EDUARDO BURRO December 17, 2012 El Now
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We tried to pick just one Top Pendejo of 2012 but we ended up with two, both from the Hate State of Arizona: Gov. Jan Brewja and Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio. The witchy woman has taken every opportunity to lie, defame, harass and impede President Obama, Mexican-American Arizonans, a woman’s right to choose, Dreamers’ […]

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Desaparecidos love song for Sheriff Joe: ‘MariKKKopa’ (video)

by QUESO QUESEM August 2, 2012 El Now
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You can feel the love for Arizona Marcipoa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio in this hot new track from the Desaparecidos. Latinos who love Sheriff Joe Sheriff Joe’s new brand of tequila Sheriff Joe vs George Lopez (NSFW video)

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Pocho Ocho worst possible summer vacation destinations

by María Purísima June 27, 2012 Cultura
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School’s out, summer’s in. Where you going for vacation? Huh? We asked you a question! OK then.  Be that way. Two can play that game. Here’s our list of the Pocho Ocho worst possible vacation destinations: 8. Community service. Were you volunteered? Court-ordered? Did your mom rope you into it? Whether it’s babysitting bratty kids […]

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Barriosphere progress slow in search for intelligent life in Arizona

by Trey Buchet May 22, 2012 Doomsday Countdown
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(PNS reporting from MEXICO) The international community is celebrating the news this week that the crew of Mexico’s Barriosphere research station made limited progress in its search for signs of intelligent life in Maricopa County, AZ. The Mexican-manned mission to Maricopa launched from a secret base in Chihuahua in May 2009 and landed in the […]

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Arizona Sheriff Joe Arpaio’s Pocho Ocho unsolved mysteries

by Bronco del Camino March 3, 2012 Cultura
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Now that  Sheriff Joe Arpaio has evidence there’s something uppity with Pres. Barack Obama’s birth certificate, what’s next on his unsolved mysteries list? 8.  Star Trek crewmen in red shirts who die early in the episode are also wearing pink chonies, but the Liberal Hollywood Establishment covers this up. 7. Every time you install a […]

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