pandering

clintoncastroAt a campaign rally last month, Hillary Clinton announced Julian Castro as her pick for VP.

Secretary of Housing and Urban Development Castro, a rising star in the party, was chosen for his ability to reach white voters.

Castro is fluent in English and very comfortable with white Americans. “Hello,” he said in his first public address as the vice-presidential nominee. “I’m happy to be here with all of you today.” The crowd responded warmly to his introduction in their native language.

“What most people don’t realize is that Julian speaks excellent English. It will give him the ability to communicate with the white vote” said a source close to the nominee. [Mas…]

THREESHOTYou’re passionate, Mr. and/or Ms. Hispanic, and emotional. You like stories, and web video stories under one minute long especially. Do we have some stories for you! Also tacos, which all Hispanics love, futbol ditto, and la musica, piñatas and burros tambien. HEY! WHAT ABOUT SPICY? [Mas…]

cucabushfamily

fdahuevosTechnically, the word I should have used above, in the headline, is “Manipulates.” As in, “Safely Manipulate Your Balls When You Celebrate!”

That’s what the Federal Drug Administration advises this season, anyway. (Screen capture, above.)

But I’m a writer who has spent a lifetime in both advertising and journalism, and I know the value of good clickbait when I have it in my hands.

Er… Line of sight. Sorry, I’m distracted by the FDA advising me to fondle one’s nether regions for Easter. [Mas…]


¡Hola, Hispanic moms! Serving your Hispanic family a dubiously-healthy breakfast is just a button-push away with Jimmy Dean® Brand croissant, egg, sausage and cheese breakfast sandwiches. Not only are they graded F for nutrition but you can heat them in the microwave to pretend you care! Each delicious serving packs a generous 60% of the daily recommended fat allowance and that means 45% of the cholesterol quota AND 60% of the saturated fat limit.

Wait, there’s more! Each sammich features a full half ounce of protein and over a third of your daily allowance for salt. Jimmy mexplains:

CHICAGO–(EON: Enhanced Online News)–The Jimmy Dean brand (www.jimmydean.com), America’s favorite traditional breakfast sausage brand* will release a new Spanish-language TV commercial this month to promote its popular line of breakfast sandwiches to Hispanic consumers. [Mas…]

borderpatrolCartoon courtesy Alliance San Diego.

Pocho Ocho ways you gabacho guys might be Hispandering

by JOSE JIMENEZ November 14, 2012 Cultura
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Since the election, all the cool guys want to be Latinos and maybe you do too, Mr. White, Non-Hispanic-American. We understand, but we want to make sure you don’t go overboard. Peep our pocho ocho ways you might be Hispandering: 8. Goodbye iPod, hello maracas 7. Your name is now spelled Bíll Coñnelly 6. You […]

[Mas…]

BFFs Mitt, Darryl visit Latino sites for Hispanic Heritage Month (photos)

by Especial Correspondents October 3, 2012 El Now
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They hooked up Tuesday when the candidate visited a Denver-area Chipotle. Then GOP presidential candidate and Latino-lover Mitt Romney and new BFF Darryl went on a bromance tour of other important Latino institutions to mark Hispanic Heritage Month, as seen in this photo of their visit to Sophia Vergara’s breasts. (She recently described her chi-chis […]

[Mas…]

‘Mitt Romney Latino Outreach’ ad seeks Colorado votes (video)

by Bronco del Camino September 27, 2012 El Now
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Gov. Mitt Romney’s campaign has released another commercial aimed at Latino voters. This one is designed for the Colorado electorate.

[Mas…]

Obama, Romney kiss brown butt in exciting panderama! (video)

by Comic Saenz June 26, 2012 El Now
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Who can kiss mas butt? President Barack Obama and Gov. Mitt Romney both spoke to the National Association of Latino Elected and Appointed Officials last week in La Florida. So who won the contest of Los Panderos? The Daily Show’s Jon Stewart reports.

[Mas…]

Pocho Ocho reasons I hate ‘Hispanic’ magazines

by Al Carlos Hernandez February 17, 2012 Cultura
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8. They are published by carpetbaggers, coconuts, and Tio Tacos. 7.  They pander to corporate interests, while pimping community issues. 6.  They are written for the sole reason of selling institutional ads. 5.  Print is dead. The only people who don’t know that are the people who fund magazines.

[Mas…]

FLOTUS on healthy food for Chicano kids: Eat like Puerto Ricans

by Lalo Alcaraz and Sara Inés Calderón February 4, 2012 Cultura
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(PNS reporting from LA FLORIDA) Joining First Lady Michelle Obama’s Let’s Move! initiative, Goya Foods, the largest Hispanic-owned U.S. food company, will help promote MiPlato, the USDA program designed to encourage children to make healthier eating choices. “Today’s announcement is about eliminating diabetes in the Mexican-American community by helping them make better choices, and, with the help […]

[Mas…]