sales


Ritual ordinario mixes the sounds of Mexican streets with visuals of the process of making, baking, and selling tortillas. This video was shot and the ambient audio recorded in Mercado Cartagena in Mexico City, D.F. [Video by Ricardo Martinez Roa.]

estehogar“It’s Proselyte Week here in Orange Aztlán,” POCHO’s anonymous Orange County photographic contributor emailed Wednesday. He put this sign on the front door of his Anaheim townhouse.

“Person after person is coming to ask whether we’ve found Jesus (“¿Ya se les extravió Jesús otra vez?! Qué descuidados son los cristianos con su salvador…”), to try and tell us Trump is more than just a bloviating human camote, to sell crappy chocolates for dubious fundraising efforts, etc. This sign has only been up for a few hours, but so far no one has knocked.”

trump-university-screenshotNewly unsealed federal fraud lawsuit records show that unqualified instructors and abusive sales tactics weren’t the only “trade secrets” Trump University was trying to hide.

Sworn testimony and company documents — ordered released by Indiana-born “Mexican judge” Gonzalo Curiel of the U.S. District Court for the Southern District of California — also revealed these Pocho Ocho Top Shameful Secrets of Trump University:

8. Trump University cafeteria’s “taco bowls” were based on a recipe rejected by Rick Bayless.

7. Trump University sales staffers (“admission counselors”) who didn’t make assigned quotas were dressed as gorillas and dropped off in Cincinnati.

6. Course outline for URBAN REAL ESTATE REDEVELOPMENT included a seminar entitled “Evicting a three-generation family business and replacing it with a chain retailer is easy if you just remember these three letters: K, K and K.” [Mas…]

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Rancho Pocho and surrounding communities will be alive with excitement tonight as everyone awaits the End of the World As We Know It at midnight local time. Don’t stay at home — party hardy or die Mayan!

Here’s what’s going on around town:

• FOR THE GENTS: In the Rancho Pocho Downtown Historic District, Club Rico for Gentlemen is offering no cover admission to a special presentation by the North Pole Dancers, the chillest elvettes to ever stuff a thong. Dressed as Santa? All lap dances are 50% off!  Prices good until midnight, of course.

• FOR THE LADIES: Don’t be fat at the end of the world — burn fat at the Grand Opening of the new Spin ‘N’ Thin Spa located where the Gun ‘N’ Run sporting goods store used to be on Miramar in Pocho Hills. Burn, baby, burn with “all you can spin” classes at two-for-one prices. Bring your BFF and spin till you barf at one low price. It’s never too spin to be thin! Special available until midnight. [Mas…]

Hey, amigos:

Yes, you, the ones with the ad agency contacts and the AlwaysBeClosing tattoos:

If you have strategic vision, sales team management experience, a thick little black book and the knife-in-your-teeth attitude of a closer, check out this job listing: POCHO wants to interview you for a job as our Jefe de Sales y Business Development.