science


The Meso-American aguacate (renamed avocado by Spanish invaders) is a prehistoric fruit that shouldn’t even be around today, all because it’s a tough nut to swallow. The Science Show breaks it down.

PREVIOUSLY ON AVOCADOS: [Mas…]


Romina the whippet, who lost her right front leg in a lawnmower accident, is being fitted with a new prosthetic limb, courtesy of the Veterinary Hospital of the Universidad del Valle de Mexico (UVM) in Mexico City. And they’re making the device with a 3-D printer.

Reuters reports: [Mas…]

maya codexThe meaning of the intricate and striking hieroglyphs of the ancient Mayans have resisted decoding for centuries, but now some scientists claim the secrets will soon be revealed.

Ancient Origins reports:

For hundreds of years, linguists have been trying to decode the ancient hieroglyphic script of the Mayans, left behind on monument carvings, painted pottery, and drawn in handmade bark-paper books. [Mas…]

fryingbaconanimatedBacon is makin’ news because a questionably-reported study says the hot and salty candy can cause cancer – or not. They say we had to ditch the bacon, but we said, “No! No! No!”

That’s because there are Pocho Ocho Top Things You Can Eat That Are Way Worse Than Bacon:

8. Bush™  special frijoles — THE BROWN ONES™ — now with 25% more nepotism! [Editor’s Note: Our sources tell us this product may not be on the market much longer. Choose wisely.]

7. Uncle Ben Carson’s Tacos de Seso

6. Ferguson’s Gelato – You’ll be screaming, “Hands up! Don’t scoop!” [Mas…]

cucamanbuns


When a British scientist and his hottie Latina girlfriend embark on an exotic jungle river quest to find a mysterious Amazon monster, what they discover is more astounding than they ever imagined — ¡Monstro!

elisecomputerMiJA Elise Roedenbeck, formerly a professional geek*, wonders if computers make our brains less creative. Since half of Elise’ cabeza is exposed to Mutant Moon Rays from Outer Espace synergistically multiplied by the Reality Distortion Field generated by her MacBook Pro, it was urgent she get an answer as quickly as possible. In this case, it took her only 3:03.

PRO TIP: Elise’s high tech screen name on the Twitter is @buttronica, so you know she’s right, especially when POCHO Migrant Editor Al Madrigal shows up on her list as #1 most creative comedian. 🙂

Here’s Buttronica’s video: [Mas…]

cucamars

One-minute educational video: How a frijol becomes a pedo

by JEFE BOYARDEE September 2, 2014 Cultura
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Frijoles, as you may recall, are good for your heart, and here’s why.

[Mas…]

Massive ancient Mayan cities found deep in Mexican jungle

by Moctezuma Cortés August 25, 2014 El Now
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Archeologists have re-discovered two ancient Mayan cities deep in the Yucatan jungle — massive cities with plazas, buildings and pyramids, some over six stories high. One spectacular find was a monster mouth portal carved with a stylized earth monster eye and fangs along the doorway jamb (photo.) The cities, Lagunita and Tamchen, flourished in what […]

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Did Puerto Rican lawyers cause rise in bed-fall fatalities?

by Comic Saenz May 12, 2014 Cultura
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(PNS reporting from CAMBRIDGE, MASS) Did you know that the more lawyers there are in Puerto Rico, the more people die from falling out of their beds? That’s the startling statistical relationship discovered by the prestigious Harvard Law-school-based Spurious Correlations Institute, one of many recently revealed on their website.

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How popcorn (hecho en Peru circa 4700 BCE) pops [video]

by MOSCA MEXICAN March 4, 2014 Cultura
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Popcorn — palomitas de maíz — was discovered-invented-perfected in Peru circa 4700 BCE, the very first domesticated corn product. Watch how the corn pops, up close and personal.

[Mas…]

Mexican biologists wonder: Where have all the axolotls gone?

by Andalé Mono January 31, 2014 Doomsday Countdown
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You know those uber-cute salamander-like axolotls who are native to the lake system in and around Mexico City? They’re gone. The Guardian reports: Growing up to a foot long (30 cm) and known as the “water monster” or the “Mexican walking fish”, its only natural habitat is the Xochimilco network of lakes and canals, which […]

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‘Think’ for yourself — all the kool kids are doing it! (video)

by BUSTER BOWLES January 14, 2014 Cartoons
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Think before you leap.

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War on Christmas: ‘Scientifically-accurate Santa Claus’ (NSFW video)

by Soy Capitan December 20, 2013 Cartoons
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He’s white, of course, and flies all around the world in one night. Here’s how he does it!

[Mas…]

Hurricane Marco Rubio on path of destruction, havoc (video)

by Moctezuma Cortés December 2, 2013 Cultura
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Hurricane Marco Rubio is headed up the East Coast, bringing havoc and destruction wherever he makes landfall.

[Mas…]

Breaking: Scientists ID ’empty the trash’ gene in male DNA

by María Purísima October 15, 2013 Cultura
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(PNS reporting from BOSTON) Geneticists at Boston University have discovered the gene in men that gives them the strength, stamina and expertise to take out the trash. According to an article published Monday in the journal Science, the gene is located near other genetic material that corresponds to mens’ inherent superior ability to mow the […]

[Mas…]

Mexican scientist reveals underground high speed travel system

by Lalo Alcaraz August 13, 2013 El Now
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(PNS reporting from GUANAJUATO, MX) Not to be outdone by Space X founder Elon Musk’s proposed high speed “Hyperloop” rail system, a Mexican engineer has plans to commercialize his country’s high speed travel infrastructure, a proprietary closed system that has been in operation for years. Researchers and engineers in this high tech city in Mexico’s […]

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Flash: Three authors get Castaneda Research Bullshit Award

by Comic Saenz June 12, 2013 Cultura
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(PNS reporting from LOS ANGELES) Carmen Reinhart and Kenneth Rogoff, authors of the mathematically-challenged Growth in a Time of Debt pro-“austerity” study, and Jason Richwine, the Heritage Foundation researcher who claimed Hispanics have lower IQs, are the recipients of the 2013 Carlos Castaneda Award for Academic Bullshit, it was announced today. The prize is named for […]

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Not everyone hates GMO foods; Itty Bitty Mexicans back GMO frijoles

by EresNerd May 31, 2013 El Now
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(PNS reporting from AUSTIN) A rainy day failed to damper the spirits of people marching against Genetically Modified Organisms in downtown Austin Thursday. With signs proclaiming JUST SAY NO TO GMO, the crowd rallied on the steps of the Capitol to protest the “seeds of destruction” they say GMO foods present to society. Not all the people […]

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Elise Roedenbeck’s ‘MiJA Weekly’ breaks the ñews 03.04.13 (video)

by Elise Roedenbeck March 4, 2013 El Now
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Hey there, Pochos! This week on MiJA I totally don’t pole dance, Obama isn’t a dork, and the Gang of Eight don’t mix well with vinegar. Also, Kim Jung Un has one black friend. Don’t make me unleash my powers of brujería! Leave your comments and questions below. Previously on MiJA Weekly….

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Tio Sam’s official gummint blog: No Mayan Apocalypse for you

by Andalé Mono December 6, 2012 Doomsday Countdown
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Yes, your Uncle Sam wastes your tax money on blogs while millions suffer and our country lurches toward the fiscal cliff. And Tio Sam says no Mayan Apocalypse for you, despite the obvious DOOMSDAY 2012 COUNTDOWN CLOCK in the right column of EVERY PAGE ON POCHO which says we only have two weeks left! Ignoring […]

[Mas…]

Pocho Ocho best definitions in the new ‘Republican Dictionary’

by DANILO GUEBSTER August 22, 2012 El Now
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Hoping to capitalize on the enormous groundswell of support they’ve generated with their new definitions of life, marriage and assault weapons, the GOP braintrust is planning to premiere a Republican Dictionary at next week’s convention in Tampa, FLA. We got a brief peek at a draft (the “rape” definition was leaked Monday); check out the […]

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GOP’s Akin to release childrens’ book on babies

by Lalo Alcaraz August 21, 2012 El Now
Thumbnail image for GOP’s Akin to release childrens’ book on babies

(PNS reporting from MISSOURI) Rep. (and Senatorial hopeful) Todd Akin (R-MO) intends to write and publish a children’s book that explains to kids how babies are made, according to his staff. The colorful How Non-Forcible Rape Babies Are Made explains Akin’s understanding of how the human reproductive system works in clear, simple language and bright illustrations […]

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