spring break

(PNS reporting from MEXICO CITY) Mexico’s senate approved a bill yesterday to build a wall around the tourist mecca of Cancun to discourage the flood of vacuous drunken junior college troglodytes that descend upon the city’s pristine beaches every “Spring Break.”

“When America sends its people, they’re not sending their best…Stop me if you’ve heard this before,” Senator Enrique LaRaza said in his speech prior to the approval vote.

“They’re sending people with Chinese symbol tattoos, and they’re getting even more regrettable tattoos here. They’re bringing spray tans. Bleach tips. They’re bringing two years of obligatory foreign language Spanish. They’re rapists. And some, I assume, go to four-year universities.” [Mas…]

In a much-criticized move, Mexico has finished construction of the border wall to keep out assholes from the United Estates.

American officials were mum after their own calls for more enforcement on this side of the border, but some politicians are mad enough to consider canceling their own Mexican spring break vacations. [Mas…]