Now that UNIVISION has become a part owner of The Onion, our media analysts have compiled the Pocho Ocho top changes you can expect from the new corporation:
8. Daily stories tagged #TelemundoFail
7. Don Francisco’s triumphant return to TV as Area Man
6. Univision closes failing millennial-oriented website The Cilantro
5. Right-wing Cubans introduced to concept of “satire”
4. Busty blonde telenovela starlets get new roles as models for headshots used in mock “man in the street” features
3. Jorge Ramos sent to acting coach to learn how to fake a smile
2. Stoned futbol announcers now say BBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWLLLLLLL
And the numero uno top change you can expect now that UNIVISION has become a part owner of The Onion is…
More websites/ingredients assimilated by Univision to build future media conglomerate El Guacamole.
Especial Correspondents Lalo Alcaraz, Eres Nerd, Estefania Zavala, and Comic Saenz contributed to this report.
Do you want to see more like this?
Can you donate $20 or $50 so we can make more Ñews y Satire?
We like making POCHO’s Ñews y Satire for you every day, but it takes money. Can you please help?
We like to afflict the comfortable, comfort the afflicted, and mock the pendejos. Please, can you help?
POCHO has no big backers, no mega investors, no brand-name “sponsors.” We get a trickle of revenue from Google Adsense (it barely pays my iPhone bill) and that’s all. No one owns us, no one tells us what we can or cannot do. But independence ain’t free. We’re hoping to raise some extra cash from you, our loyal readers. Can you help?
We would like to upgrade our hardware/server arrangements, redesign the website, and maybe someday pay our hard-working editors, talented writers, visionary photographers, and kick-ass cartoonists. Oh yes, and our pinches lawyers tambien. Can you help?
Your small donation will keep the Ñews y Satire flowing. Click on the DONATE button to give. We thank you for your support.