After the responses came in, we picked the best answers, and then carefully removed all the information that could personally identify the authors because El Cucuy.
And so we present Los Pochodores’ Pocho Ocho Top New Year Revolutions:
8. Curb my smartphonethusiasm [I’m not addicted. I can unplug any time I want. Hold on I have a text.]
7. Find a better way to check if I washed all the jalapeño juice off my hands — better than rubbing my eyes.
6. Get my Mexican Wife Game on point with a new, improved caldo de res recipe.
7. Get a new job to supplement income from five other jobs
6. Take a vacation at one of those nice FEMA camps
5. Quit drinking alcohol that doesn’t get me fucked up really fast
4. Reduce financial stress by picking up a hobby, like bank robbing, or writing a hit song
3. Start eating my 10-year supply of freeze-dried survival food
2. “Party Like It’s 2012”
And my top New Year’s Resolution for 2012:
What are your New Year’s resolutions? Post them here!