It’s Presidents Day: The good and the not so good (NSFW)


The Good:

George Washington’s birthday is a federal holiday celebrated on the third Monday of February in honor of George Washington, the first President of Los United Estates, AKA The Father of Our Country. Some people call it Presidents Day (sometimes spelled Presidents’ Day or President’s Day.)

The Not So Good:

Dave Chappelle isn’t so sure about George’s special day, right there in the middle of Black History Month (NSFW Video):

Mas…It’s Presidents Day: The good and the not so good (NSFW)

Mexican Mitt Romney: ‘Sheriff Paul Babeau’s GAYDAR got to the bottom of the illegal problem’

Anti-Immigrant Pinal County Sheriff Paul Babeu has resigned as Mitt Romney’s Arizona GOP Primary Campaign Co-Chair.  Sheriff Babeu is facing explosive allegations that he tried to intimidate a former Mexican immigrant lover with deportation threats. Especial Guest Columnist Mexican Mitt Romney offers his Opinión:

Sheriff Babeu has stepped down from his volunteer position with the campaign so he can spend more time fighting with his gay mojado boyfriend.

I am so sad that Sheriff Babeu had to geu.

But he has a bigger fight on his hands than getting me elected President of the United Estates. Babeu is going to focus more on wrestling the problem of illegal immigration to the ground.

Sheriff Babeu is right when he says America’s head is buried in a pillow over immigration. Sheriff Babeu has always said he wants to get ahead of the mojados, and inside the illegals. Inside their minds! Ajua!

Mas…Mexican Mitt Romney: ‘Sheriff Paul Babeau’s GAYDAR got to the bottom of the illegal problem’

Standing While Brown: A white lady tried to get me to valet her car

I was not dressed like this

Representing Pocho.com, I was a panelist along with a table full of young, savvy Latino digital media types as part of last night’s Digital LA Latino Content event.

Afterwards, I finished up networking and headed outside to leave. As I waited to get my car in front of the host restaurant in Beverly Hills, you’ll never guess what happened: A white lady tried to give me her car valet ticket. Twice.

You’ve heard this story a thousand times before; it’s a Latino cliché. Or is it a tradition?

Anglo person assumes brown person is a worker, there to serve them.

An old Chicano chestnut goes something like this:

I’m a Mexican-American, am married to a white woman, and I was mowing our lawn in front of our nice, big home. A white lady pulled up in a car and asked, “How much do you charge to mow a lawn?” My answer: Nothing. The lady of the house lets me sleep with her.

Mas…Standing While Brown: A white lady tried to get me to valet her car

Mississippi: Rename Gulf of Mexico to ‘Gulf of America’

Mississippi state representative Stephen Holland

A Mississippi state lawmaker introduced legislation Tuesday that would rename the Gulf of Mexico the “Gulf of America.”

According to state Rep. Stephen Holland’s bill, the name would apply only to his home state, much to the relief of embarrassed neighboring states.

Ironically, Holland chose to rename this international body of water “Gulf of America,” not understanding that “America” is the name of the whole American hemisphere, mainly because the word “hemisphere” is twice as long as most words the average Mississippian legslator understands.

Mas…Mississippi: Rename Gulf of Mexico to ‘Gulf of America’

Clean sweep: Santorum not pooped out yet

(PNS reporting from THE HEARTLAND) Republican presidential candidate Rick Santorum swept the nominating contests in Missouri, Minnesota and Colorado Tuesday night, claiming, “My campaign is far from pooped out.”

The fiercest gay-baiting candidate in recent history, Santorum now has four victories under his belt in the GOP race, more than any other closeted candidate. “People were saying all along I had Big Mo, but they meant I was a big ‘mo.”

Mas…Clean sweep: Santorum not pooped out yet

FLOTUS on healthy food for Chicano kids: Eat like Puerto Ricans

First Lady at Goya photo-op (screen capture abcactionnews.com)

(PNS reporting from LA FLORIDA) Joining First Lady Michelle Obama’s Let’s Move! initiative, Goya Foods, the largest Hispanic-owned U.S. food company, will help promote MiPlato, the USDA program designed to encourage children to make healthier eating choices.

“Today’s announcement is about eliminating diabetes in the Mexican-American community by helping them make better choices, and, with the help of Goya, forcing them to eat like Cubans and Puerto Ricans,” Obama said Friday.

“Everything that Goya is doing,” she said, “centers around a simple idea: this country’s Mexican children need to be told what to eat by a corporate conglomerate that mass-produces Caribbean food.”

Obama joined Goya president Bob Unanue and leading Latino organizations at a Tampa supermarket to promote healthy eating nationwide with a special focus on the incorrectly-nourished Mexican-American community.

Mas…FLOTUS on healthy food for Chicano kids: Eat like Puerto Ricans

Moonbase issue casts shadow on final GOP debate

(PNS reporting from LA FLORIDA) The moon was high on the debate agenda last night as Gov. Mitt Romney and former Rep. Newt Gingrich crossed lightsabers with both candidates fighting hard to capture the crucial lunar vote.

The encounter, held at Farpoint Station Laser Tag in Orlando, was the 79th GOP debate and the last before Tuesday’s primary election.

Gingrich, his arms unfurled, set the tone by calling for the establishment of a permanent base on the moon by the year 2020. Gingrich has also set this date as a deadline for establishing a new marriage with a heretofore unexplored Mrs. Gingrich #4.

Warning that the Chinese would dominate outer space if the U.S.A. does not step up in the moonbase race, Gingrich said “Frankly, the Chinese can probably set up the first Panda Express on the moon in 30 minutes or less.”

Mas…Moonbase issue casts shadow on final GOP debate

Arizona racist white ladies threaten Mexicans: THE MOVIE

Not all people from Arizona are stupid racist dumbasses, but the two young women starring in the now-infamous year-old Racist Arizona White Ladies video sure are. It was reposted recently on YouTube and viewed over 1.2 million times. Throughout this poorly-lit hate flick two young female Arizonans cheer on the anti-immigrant law SB1070, which has since been partially gutted by courts, and engage in racist name-calling and vile stereotyping, and issue horrid violent threats to their brown-skinned neighbors.

Mas…Arizona racist white ladies threaten Mexicans: THE MOVIE

CA Dream Act repeal fails to gather enough hateful signatures

Racist asshole signature failure

(SACRAMENTO) Republican Assemblyman Tim Donnelly announced today that his effort to repeal the California Dream Act, which allows undocumented students to apply for in-state tuition and scholarships in the state’s universities, has failed to collect enough signatures from racist assholes to get on the ballot.

Mas…CA Dream Act repeal fails to gather enough hateful signatures

Pocho Ocho cosas I found in my Rosca de Reyes

Happy Three Kings Day, Dia de Los Reyes Magos, AKA Epiphany, the day when Los Tres Reyes dropped by the manger to gift up the original Anchor Baby, El Baby Jesus.

In Mexico and now all across Pocholandia, some celebrate with the Rosca de Reyes, a tasty and yeasty treat topped with butter and sugar.

Sometimes it is soaked in rum, like Tio Frankie. Baked inside is a plastic Baby Jesus figurine, which, if you get it in your slice of pan, symbolizes great fortune. And it also means you are stuck with the bill for yet another Catholic drinkfest one month later.

Below are the top eight things we have found in the Rosca de Reyes here at the POCHO world headquarters! Enjoy!

8. Plastic Baby Jesus

7. One long black hair

6. Homies Doll, “Cholo Priest”

Mas…Pocho Ocho cosas I found in my Rosca de Reyes

Obama immigration officials run out of immigrants to deport, switch to deporting American citizens

In a curious move, the Barack Obama White House is campaigning tirelessly for the Latino  re-election vote while also deporting a record number of undocumented immigrants.

In a mad dash to burnish their law-and-order credentials, Obama officials have deported over a million undocumented immigrants during the past 2 1/2 years and are on track to out-deport the two-term Bush administration’s 1.57 million. In fact, they have deported so many undocumented immigrants they may have depleted the supply.

They have turned to an American resource to fill the void: deporting U.S. citizens. The instances are numerous, and growing:

Mas…Obama immigration officials run out of immigrants to deport, switch to deporting American citizens

Iowa analysis: Hatred for poor edges out homophobia, racism

Former Sen. Rick Santorum's election campaign rubbed up behind Romney's muscular Iowa presence

(PNS reporting from IOWA) Hatred for the poor won in Iowa yesterday,  squeaking by second-place entry homophobia and runners-up racism and tax evasion in the hotly-contested GOP caucuses.

In a stunning, almost come-from-behind finish, current homophobe and former Pennsylvania Sen. Rick Santorum ended the caucus vote in a number two position, rubbing up right behind human simulation Mitt Romney.

Mas…Iowa analysis: Hatred for poor edges out homophobia, racism

Lalo’s Pocho Ocho New Year’s resolutions

8. Wear more slimming clothes

7. Get a new job to supplement income from five other jobs

6. Take a vacation at one of those nice FEMA camps

5. Quit drinking alcohol that doesn’t get me fucked up really fast

4. Reduce financial stress by picking up a hobby, like bank robbing, or writing a hit song

3. Start eating my 10-year supply of freeze-dried survival food

2. “Party Like It’s 2012”

And my top New Year’s Resolution for 2012:

72 dpi

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What are your New Year’s resolutions? Post them here!

Razaphobic AZ judge just says ‘nein’ to Mexican-American Studies

Arizona has made it illegal to be brown in their state, now that a judge has ruled that it is illegal to think brown.

Tucson Unified School District’s Mexican-American Studies Department has lost an appeal before a Razaphobic judge and faces the complete dismantling of their academic program. Mexican-American Studies educates brown and non-brown children, but the main problem to Superintendent John Huppenthal is that brown children come out smarter and empowered after taking MAS courses.

Arizona state school officials violate the educational rights of brown children while Sheriff Joe Arpaio allows the violation of brown children.

Cue the banjos!