El Now
It’s News to Us!
Never-published ‘Alt-Right’ tabloid front page called HRC win an ‘attack’
(PNS reporting from the ALT YORK CITY, ALT YORK) The Wednesday issue of the local “Alt-Right” newspaper — The Putin Press & Patriot — was prepared to report a Hillary Clinton’s election victory as an “attack” on America, PNS has learned (photo.) [Editor’s Note: A “newspaper” is an pre-Millennial period analog instantiation of intellectual property — i.e. “content” — fixed on a physical medium comprised of a data-carrying chemical reagent and processed dead trees.]
POCHO ÑEWS SERVICE PNS IS A WHOLLY-FICTITIOUS SUBSIDIARY OF POCHISMO INC., A CALIFORNIA CORPORATION, WHO IS A PERSON ACCORDING TO THE SUPREME COURT. DON’T ASK US, WE JUST WORK HERE.
Germans: You go, USA, and ‘Grab US by the P*ssy!’ (music video, lyrics)
Hey, America! You can do anything since you’re a star. Grab US by the P*ssy, please.
Love,
Your friends von Desutschland.
[Video via NEO MAGAZIN ROYALE.]Los lyrics:
Mas…Germans: You go, USA, and ‘Grab US by the P*ssy!’ (music video, lyrics)
The few, the brave, the greedy: THE CORPORINES! (PSA)
Are you brave enough? Strong enough? Willing to fight to protect the profits of the rich and powerful? Consider signing up with newest branch of the service: THE CORPORINES! Active combat deployments available now in Standing Rock, North Dakota.
Vote! Damian Lopez Rodriguez died to become a citizen (video)
Damian Lopez Rodriguez was brought to the USA without documents as a child — you know, one of those rapists and narcos from Mexico Donald Trump is going to deport.
Damian loved his new country so much he enlisted in the Army when he turned 18. After he died in Iraq, he was granted posthumous citizenship by President George Bush. Damian’s dad has faith his son in Heaven is voting in this election. Are you?
He was a Latino GOP official, until Donald Trump came along (video)
Ignacio Padilla was always Republican; he even served as treasurer of the party in New Mexico. But everything changed when Trump became the party’s nominee. Padilla started making Trump piñatas and was fired. Now he gives people in Santa Fe a chance to hit Trump.
In South Philly, immigrant restauranteurs worry about Trump (videos)
Donald Trump’s racist anti-immigrant rhetoric is a big worry for immigrant-owned businesses. The owners of a South Philadelphia staple, South Philly Barbacoa — around the corner from the famed Italian street market — are concerned about what a victory by GOP haters might mean for their family. [Video by Cora Cervantes.]
Mas…In South Philly, immigrant restauranteurs worry about Trump (videos)
RIP y QDEP: Ramón ‘Chunky’ Sanchez, pocho hero of San Diego
I was sad to hear that San Diego and Barrio Logan Chicano icon Ramón “Chunky” Sanchez passed away Friday at the age of 65.
Born in 1951 in Blythe, California, Chunky learned to play music from his family, and lived his childhood as a migrant farmworker. He left the farm he worked with his father soon after hearing the owner tell his dad that Chunky would make a great foreman when he was gone.
He decided to go to college, and eventually landed at San Diego State. Chunky and his brother Ricardo’s band Los Alacranes Mojados were a fixture when I was a MEChista at San Diego State; I can’t tell you how many events they played for us and for the entire movimiento.
Mas…RIP y QDEP: Ramón ‘Chunky’ Sanchez, pocho hero of San Diego
You Are There: Donald Trump Rally in Albuquerque (photos, videos)
In more or less chronological order, here are my live Tweets from today’s Donald Trump campaign rally in Albuquerque, New Mexico….
'Clowns for Trump' protesters greeting @realDonaldTrump supporters to #ABQ campaign stop pic.twitter.com/WfrorusPF4
— Russell Contreras (@RussContreras) October 31, 2016
Mas…You Are There: Donald Trump Rally in Albuquerque (photos, videos)
MEXCLUSIVE VIDEO EXPOSE: In Texas, a ‘Pachanga for Trump’
What really goes on when Latinos for Trump throw a get-out-the-vote campaign party for their candidate? Pachanga for Trump goes into the belly of the GOP beast to find out the shocking truth. [Video by the Latino Comedy Project.]
You want a wall on the border? Let’s paint it pink! (photos)
Interns at Guadalajara architecture firm Estudio 3.14 came up a modern design for Donald Trump’s insane border wall.
They want to paint it pink in the style of famed Mexican architect Luis Barragán.
Mas…You want a wall on the border? Let’s paint it pink! (photos)
Good luck with the 1954 miles of the US-Mexico wall (video)
Best of Luck with the Wall takes the viewer on a hypnotic visual voyage across the length and breadth the U.S.-Mexico border, stitched together from 200,000 satellite images. [Directed and explained by Josh Begley.]
Joad Cressbeckler: Migrants who survive AZ desert deserve citizenship
On The Cressbeckler Stance, talk show host Joad Cressbeckler says any Mexican who crosses the scorching-hot desert on foot has proved himself worthy of U.S. citizenship.
Calaveras y catrinas y skeletons parade in Mexico City (video)
Hundred paraded through the streets of Mexico City last weekend to celebrate Dia de Los Muertos, aka Day of the Dead.
Latinos boo Senator ‘Little’ Marco Rubio at Orlando fiesta (audio, video)
If was not a fun fiesta for Senator Marco Rubio (R-FLA) Sunday when Orlando festival goers greeted his appearance with a chorus of yells, jeers and boos.
Florida Sen. Marco Rubio got booed off a stage in Orlando on Sunday, by a crowd that was overwhelmingly Latino.
It happened at Calle Orange, a street festival in downtown Orlando geared toward the city’s large Puerto Rican community. The icy reception was an indication of the challenges that Rubio, a Republican of Cuban heritage, has faced in locking down support from Latinos in Florida as the state’s Latino electorate has begun to shift to the left….
“I’m going to introduce a man who represents Latinos, no matter where you’re from,” the emcee boomed in Spanish. The boos grew louder still. “Ladies and gentlemen, the senator for the state of Florida, a Latino like you and me … his name is Marco Rubio! Applaud!”
We’ve got video and audio:
Mas…Latinos boo Senator ‘Little’ Marco Rubio at Orlando fiesta (audio, video)
R U READY? It’s time for ‘The Donald Victory Dance!’ (video)
Can you Dance Like Donald? All the kool kids are doing it! [Video by BlueDogFilms.]
Donald Trump’s campaign bus breaks down in Florida (animated GIF)
[From the Internets. Author unknown. Thank you, though.]
Arizona Ex-Governor Jan Brewja’s Pocho Ocho Mas Loco Predictions
Former Arizona Governor Jan Brewja is predicting Donald Trump will win in the Hate State elections because Latinos won’t vote.
“Nah,” Brewer said in an interview with the Boston Globe. “They don’t get out and vote. They don’t vote.”
What else does she foresee? Here are her Pocho Ocho Mas Loco Predictions:
8. Pigs will fly.
7. When nasty women stop provoking the average guy with slutty clothes, rapes will stop.
6. If regulators approve the AT&T-Time Warner merger, the cable guy will actually arrive between 10am and 2pm.
Mas…Arizona Ex-Governor Jan Brewja’s Pocho Ocho Mas Loco Predictions
Salsa band Grupo Descarrilao: Trump is a ‘Bully’ (NSFW music video)
New York hiphop-rock-salsa band Grupo Descarrilao is beyond ready to stop Donald Trump the Bully. Are you? Register. Vote. VOTOLATINO can help. [NSFW adult language.]