Tia Lencha’s Cocina: On Father’s Day I think about my ex’s chorizo

leavingmanHola. Is Tia Lencha here.

After many jears of being divorce from mijo’s daddy, (that’s a photo of him leaving I took for the lawyer), I share with ju the recipe I make for the Father’s Day, which is on Sunday. When I think of mijo’s daddy, I think of chorizo.

Oso, when I see a good looking chorizo at the store, I think of mijo’s daddy. Get jur mind out of the trash can, cochinos. Is because mijo’s daddy make really good chorizo!

Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: On Father’s Day I think about my ex’s chorizo

Oxnard man says ‘Hand of God’ saved family from salsa poisoning

Jar of Herdez Salsa Casera(PNS reporting from OXNARD, CA) Sam Fuentes is certain he and his kids would be dead today if God hadn’t intervened.

“The Lord Almighty — with a strong hand and an outstretched arm — saved us from the Grim Reaper, that’s for sure!” the Del Norte businessman and father of two told PNS. “That salsa coulda killed us, but it didn’t.”

Fuentes called the POCHO ñewsroom tipline (408-POCHO-28) to share his story.

The brush with death by salsa, his voicemail said, began Sunday morning after church when he began preparing pot roast for his children Selena, 9, and Chente, 11, who were “his” over the weekend per terms of the custody agreement with his ex-wife Evangelina.

“I got the recipe right off the Internets from the Herdez gente. I trust Herdez Salsa Casera. I have toda confianza, just like the label says. It’s Mexico’s favorite and my mom always swore by it,” Fuentes said:

Mas…Oxnard man says ‘Hand of God’ saved family from salsa poisoning

Adios, Gordo Gingrich! You’ll never get your sangwich :(


Former Freaker of the House Newt Gingrich’s campaign for the Republican presidential nomination is over. POCHO laments the loss of this serial adulterer and nominee wannabe, as his ignorant, racist douchebaggery provided us with lots of ñews, including this Spanish-language campaign commercial with realistic English subtitles.

And there’s more below:

Mas…Adios, Gordo Gingrich! You’ll never get your sangwich 🙁