“Please allow me to introduce myself,” he said. “I’m a man of wealth and taste. I’ve been around for a long, long year, stole many a man’s soul and faith. Pleased to meet you; hope you guess my name. But what’s puzzling you is the nature of my game.”
It’s a brand new Rolling Stones song and it’s about zombies! No, it isn’t about Keef, even though it’s called Doom and Gloom. It’s about fracking, senseless wars, thieving politicos, heartless asshats, etc.
Mick Jagger saves the world of course:
[I] crash landed in the Louisiana swamp, shot up a horde of zombies but I come out on top
(PNS reporting from the YUCATAN) The emergency Leap Year meeting of the Eschatological Chronology Society ended in disarray here Thursday as doomsday gurus couldn’t agree on whether the Mayan Apocalypse should be calculated in Colored People’s Time, Chicano Time or Jewish Standard Time.
Scientists at the conference were hoping to resolve the question before Leap Day on Feb. 29 and go home with a solid fix on how many days are left before the Lunar-Based Aliens from Mars that NASA is hiding do their Lunatic thing and immanentize the eschaton.
Now the tick-tock boffins will have to reconvene and deduce the time warp again.