When Hell is full, pinche dead turkeys will stalk the living. THANKSGIVING opens today at a theater near you. (Violent, gory and maybe some side boob.)
This is the video all the POCHODORES watch every Thanksgiving. It features WKRP’s Les Nessman reporting:
I can see it now -- the WKRP Holiday Helicopter is coming in low over Cincinnati!
8. In the event store security confiscates your Mace®, pick up some Aqua Net™ on Aisle 3.
7. Shoppers who carry their own rolls of yellow “crime scene” warning tape can easily discourage other shoppers from entering the Home Entertainment Department.
6. Successful shoppers are well-equipped shoppers. Must-have items include snacks, a gas mask, body armor where available and a small knife (plus a newspaper to hide the knife.) Experienced shoppers only: Weaponized chanclas.
Is Tia Lencha here. Gwhat is Mexican Thanksgiving Day you ask? Is Thanksgiving but with all Mexican food. What?!?! My gringo frends say. Oh no! How you can do that! Is crazy! And Tia Lencha say, no really.
When I help mijo with his homeworks, I learn that Thanksgiving come from a Puritan holiday in Englands. When it was the Reformation the Protestantes wanted to throw away all the Catholic holidays, even Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny!
8. The frozen string beans in the casserole were past their sell-by date
7. Pilgrim Zephaniah Winslow = silent but deadly
6. Squanto’s “Mezcla de Maiz” was really esquites from the barrio elotero.
Yes, you can do Thanksgiving makeup without ripping off the 566 Federally-recognized American Indian tribes. Sailor J and the Center for American Indian Research & Native Studies explain in this NSFW (F-bomb) video.
The Pilgrims, after all, were boat people fleeing religious oppression, ordinary families seeking freedom in a new land. But no one expects the Algonquin Migra. [Video by the 18 Mighty Mountain Warriors.]