POCHO scoured the interwebs for the Pocho Ocho best Christmas presents for Mexican yuppies. Check our list:
8. The MuchachaBot 3000 — with patented Chanclazo® and “anti-manoseada” technology — will clean up all the cochinadas in your cantón or condo.
7. Keep your homeland secure with the MigraForce Drone with Sancho-seeker™ stealth capabilities.
6. Display your hija’s GED with pride with the TinPloma frame, customizable with a variety of milagros, calaveras, pajaritos, corazones, or the patron saint of your choice.
5. La Santa Cecilia albums – En serio, because everyone should own every single album. Cómpralos ya!
4. Decorate your guest bed or living room wall with the luxurious 100% cabrito fur Cobiluja™ Blanket, available in selected classic patterns: tiger eyes, Aztec warrior, lowrider logo, aguila con serpiente, and mujer encuerada.
3. Turn the heads of the galanes in accounting with La Sad Girl Salon’s Frida Kahlo Eyebrow Treatment.
2. Keep your patitias warm with the super high-loft 800-fill PlumitaTek™ down-insulated Gore-Tex Ultra-Mega-Uber-Huaraches, sure to provide lasting comfort both après-ski as well as après-parranda.
And the numero uno sure-to-please Muppy gift present for 2014 is…
Membership in the The Tamal of the Month Club.