Watch: Elise Roedenbeck reads ‘Dinosaur Porn’ (Yes, it’s a thing!)

POCHO amiga Elise Roedenbeck (who is sill on our masthead as NYC Bureau Chief Emeritus the fact of which we are periodically required to remind you of as a result of the settlement order, without admitting or denying guilt and/or culpability) explores the steamy sexy world of Dino Porn. These big hunks o’ meat are horny and your scent is just perfect. Elise is @buttronica on the Twitter. Don’t tell T-Rex we were sexting!

PNS*Hot*Flash: Yucatán prays for Russia after meteor

(PNS reporting from MEXICO) This just in: The Yucatán Peninsula is sending thoughts and prayers to the people of the Ural Mountains of Russia impacted by today’s meteorite. “Sixty-six million years ago, one of those pinche asteroids hit me and killed my dinosaurs,” Yucatan told reporters at a hastily-called press conference.  “I am still upset about it.” The Yucatán Peninsula is planning a concert with Juanes and Pitbull to raise funds for the Russian people.

Mas…PNS*Hot*Flash: Yucatán prays for Russia after meteor