BREAKING: Bernie Bros’ exploding heads spur FBI zombie alert

fbizombies(PNS reporting from WASHINGTON, D.C.) The FBI is warning citizens to be on the lookout for hungry zombies attracted by the brains spewed from the exploding heads of diehard Bernie Bros.

Bernie Sanders supporters’ brains, the Feds said, are piling up on the streets of gentrified neighborhoods across America.

The brainiac explosions followed Sanders’ endorsement of Democratic presidential nomination rival Hillary Clinton this morning.

“These zombies especially love the entitled taste of Bernie Bro brains,” FBI spokesman Whitman “Ken” Jump told a press conference here today (photo). “We’re calling them Zombros.

Mas…BREAKING: Bernie Bros’ exploding heads spur FBI zombie alert

Batsh1t crazy TX Rep. Louie Gohmert: Beware of gays in space! (videos)


Congressman Louie Gohmert (R-Texas) has deep feels about his gay brothers and sisters in space because an asteroid killed the dinosaurs and what about extra-terrestrial colonies like Matt Damon and God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve. He shared his concerns on the floor of the United States House of Representatives in late May.

INVERSE reports:

Mas…Batsh1t crazy TX Rep. Louie Gohmert: Beware of gays in space! (videos)

To win playing BORDERS, you need to beat La Migra (video)


BORDERS is a game from Gonzalo Alvarez where players walk in the shoes of an immigrant to endure the danger of a journey across the desert. You only win if you can avoid La Migra and beat the heat by hiding under bushes and staying hydrated. Many make the journey towards the border with the promise of a better life, but only the fittest survive.

Mas…To win playing BORDERS, you need to beat La Migra (video)

You can ‘Reach for the Stars’ with a plastic grabber thingy (video)


TAPE RECORDING:

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to write, shoot, cut and complete a short comedy video in 48 hours including this line of dialogue --"Am I missing something here?" -- a character named Lee or Leah Gregory, and a plaster grabber thingy as a prop.

SERGIO AND JULIO GONZALEZ OF IDAHO, USA:

OK.

Sergio Anthony Gonzalez explains via email:

Mas…You can ‘Reach for the Stars’ with a plastic grabber thingy (video)