(PNS reporting from NEW ORLEANS) The “Honorable” Judge Edith Jones further angered civil rights and animal rights activists today when she issued a statement claiming killer whales were more violent than other sea life because they are black.
Jones, who was blasted for her earlier assertion that blacks and Latinos are more violent than Caucasians, ignored a court-ordered injunction to stop embarrassing herself and loudly voiced her controversial opinion about the beloved aquatic mammals at a bar association “power breakfast” in the French Quarter this morning.
Her comment was spurred by the new documentary Blackfish, which deals with a tragic killer whale-related fatality at Sea World.
At an afternoon press conference in Spanish Harlem, New York City, civil rights leader Emiliano Zapata “EZ” Shabazz-Jones harpooned Judge Jones (no relation) for what he referred to as “downright inflammacious and inbredularious nonsense.”
“The killer whale is the Mandinka Aztec warrior of the sea,” said Shabazz-Jones (no relation). “They are noble and spiritual creatures who care for their families and carry on a strong oral tradition, unlike real killers, such as the the Great, dare I say, White Shark, a sadistic killing machine which is known as the Klansman of the Deep.”
Shabazz-Jones also lashed out at Sea World for what he termed the “modern-day slavitude” of killer whales. These leviathans of the deep are brutally separated from their families, sold into slavery and forced to accept “slavemaster names such as Toby and Willy instead of their birth names, like Eeee-Eeee-Aiiii-Eee, which means ‘Kind Fin’ in Orca,” according to Shabazz-Jones.
Shabazz-Jones showed reporters a PowerPoint presentation which he said documented high correlations of serial killer, cannibal and gun rampage behavior demonstrated by Great White sharks and Caucasians.
“While the statistics show a definite concatenation, there’s nothing standard about this deviation,” said Shabazz-Jones, who took basic statistics three times in college.