(PNS reporting from AUSTIN) Gov. Rick Perry is disappointed his new hipster glasses haven’t helped him in the polls.
“Why don’t people like me? I’m more than just the guy who came after Bush, I’m cool, see?” he told reporters at a press conference at the Capitol Wednesday as he pointed to his stylin’ horn rim frames from Warby Parker.
According to insiders, Perry thought the hipster glasses would not only make him more likeable but would also make people think he’s smarter, too.
“I watch Dr. Who,” said Perry. “I’m been hanging at Waterloo Records trying to make friends with guys with beards. I’m growing some fierce sideburns.”
Polls show that neither Republicans nor Democrats care for the state’s longest-serving governor; they just have accepted the reality of his being there. Perry’s last-ditch effort to build a following for himself has gone largely unnoticed.
“Hey, a guy can make mistakes, you know?” he said at the press conference.
“There are three things I wanted to accomplish as governor: bring more jobs to the state, destroy the University of Texas, and…oops! I forgot the third one.”
EreseNerd contributed to this story tambien.