Dear President Donald Trump:
Now that you’ve become our new emperor, I mean, the 45th President of the United States, I have a confession: I’m an “anchor baby.” Given that you represent the best white hope to “Make America Great Again!” I’m confessing in exchange to be pardoned for my birthright citizenship crime.
Honestly, I didn’t know that being born to Mexican immigrants on work visas violated the law or that pesky little thing called the 14th Amendment of the Constitution. If I would’ve known of your novel interpretation of our Constitution, I mean your Constitution, I would’ve pleaded in my mother’s womb to be aborted.
Oh, I forgot, Republicans don’t believe in abortions. Does the GOP make exceptions for brown fetuses?
You crack down on their assets.
You cut off their oil and drill, baby, drill for our own.
We don’t retreat. We reload against any foe daring to test us.
And that is what Iran just did.
So, Congress, you got to kill the deal. The president is playing you. He so disrespects you, Congress, and our Constitution, that he won’t even bring you the treaty.
Leftist loonies like Nicolas Maduro of Venezuela don’t much like criticism or mockery (i.e., reality) so they throttle creative freedom.
Israel Centeno, who fled the Venezuelan Bolivarian socialist paradise, is among the exiled writers who have found a safe place to live and write in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.
This is your MIGRA on Brazil.
The Ronald Reagan Library celebrated the 40th president’s 102nd birthday today by releasing this never-before-seen archival footage of Reagan in action during the height of the 1986 Iran-Contra Scandal.
Revered by neo-cons, ex-cons and decepticons as a doting old Weeble, Reagan is considered by many as the ultimate con. The Gipper’s birthday is celebrated in the United States, the Middle East and Central America as a National Day of Lying.
“At his worst, Mr. Romney sounded like a beauty pageant contestant groping for an answer to the final question…” –Editorial, The New York Times.
Blasting Pres. Barack Obama for letting Vietnam “just sit there,” Perry (R-TX) said the area is susceptible to a light-speed invasion from Mexican Klingons and possibly people who hate Christmas.
“Look, these people have the technology. I’ve seen it. I think the idea that we allow these Mexi-Klingons to come back into Vietnam and take over that country, with all of the treasure, both in blood and money, and uhm, one other thing, oh shit…well with all that we have spent there because this president wants to kowtow to his Borg leftist base…I think it is a huge mistake,” Perry said during the debate.