[EDITOR’S NOTE:Janet Air? Huh? Click here to learn more.]
PREVIOUSLY ON PROPHECIES OF DOOM:
Nothing like a cool refreshing cerveza on a hot dusty desert day. El Mexican gets all that, and more.
Barley fields in Texcoco, northeast of Mexico DF, were marked with strange sprawling “crop circles” on Christmas Eve.
Euronews outlet Ruptly described the discovery and name checked “chupakabra” in the headline:
UFO researchers gathered in Presidio, Texas this weekend for the annual Border Zone UFO festival, where Kenneth Dudley warned of a “possible conflict between the [space] aliens and humans” over “nuclear weapons.”
A sexy green-skinned alien chica was photographed Wednesday with her hands in the masa at Tortilleria El Matate in America’s most popular UFO destination, Roswell, New Mexico. [Photo by and © Russ Contreras.]
*UPDATE JAN. 17 9:10PM:
The crew at Lugar High (in Lugar Heights) gets a visit from space aliens who, like all space aliens, want to empower Latinos. The Lugar kids’ mission, should they decide to accept it: Confront the evil Don Nabisco, host of a wildly-popular TV show. Look for special guest star cameos by Che Guevara and Sammy Sosa.
Really, you want to do the right thing. Love thy neighbor, turn the other cheek, if it’s yellow let it mellow.
Enticing noises. Hypnotic lights.
All your life you’ve been thinking about the Mothership and the Space Brothers and ZOMG here they are in your backyard! What do you do? You do the Christian thing and invite them in for cuppa tea, of course. And what the frack do the aliens do? Hint: It involves babies and microwaves. (Based on a true story. Simulated gore may sicken people who are sickened by that kind of stuff.)
We might not know anything about them, but Anonymous knows almost everything about us, including stuff THE MAN doesn’t want YOU to know.
The modishly-masked online crusaders will soon shock our chakras with the truth about apocalyptic confluences predicted by the Mayan Calendar and aether-entities from outer espace. Predictably, the Mainstream Media New World Order 1% Wall Street Ivy League Illuminati White Elite is fighting back.
The recent Anonymous blipvert above, for example, was followed by UPenn (founded by life on Mars expert and immigrant hater Benjamin Franklin) joining the Illuminati conspiracy to discredit the Mayan Apocalypse Doomsday 2012 scenario.
One group of chronology-challenged eschatologists even claimed that a recently-discovered calendar — which is older than the Doomsday Calendar — somehow makes the newer calendar wrong. Doh! Illogical!
Almost three dozen sheep lie dead in a corral in Michoacan and one witness blames a creature with fangs and wings. From Britain’s Daily Mail:
When farmers in Mexico found 35 of their sheep slaughtered with significant claw and tooth marks around their necks, they had one creature to blame – the legendary chupacabra. One man tending to the sheep overnight in the small Mexican town of Paracuaro said he saw animals with sharp fangs and wings kill the livestock. Dubbed the ‘Bigfoot of Latin culture,’ the chupacabra is a legendary four-legged creature that many think is responsible for attacking and killing livestock.
But how does a flying chupacabra compare with a flying purple people eater? And who wants to actually SEE a flying saucer? Two music videos below provide the answers