Got CLAP? (Press release: Conservative Latino Alliance for Prosperity)

Join us, wan't you?

[FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE JUNE 1, 2012] C.L.A.P. (Conservative Latino Alliance for Prosperity) is holding its Annual Membership Drive throughout the month of June.

C.L.A.P., founded in 1912, is the oldest conservative Latino organization in the nation. For 100 years, we’ve worked tirelessly to return the country to core conservative principles.

These are our guiding principles:

Pillar 1: Immigration

Fact: Rare baseball cards, comics, and stamps increase in value the scarcer they become. With over 50 million Latinos in the U.S., our value to this country has become more and more diluted . As a result, C.L.A.P. aims to deport all Latinos (regardless of residency status) until four or five very valuable Latinos remain. There is power in numbers – very, very small numbers.

Mas…Got CLAP? (Press release: Conservative Latino Alliance for Prosperity)

Shocking study links global warming and Latino immigration

Courtesy 'International Correlations of Climatology'

(PNS reporting from ARIZONA) The warmer the U.S. gets, the more Latinos live here. That’s the controversial conclusion of a scientific study released Thursday by the Demographic Climatology Trend Institute at Maricopa County Community College.

“We don’t know if the warmer weather makes El Norte a more comfortable place to live for Mexicans used to desert living, you know, with the sombreros and cacti and burros, or that the number of brown people on our side of the border means more sunlight is getting absorbed and kicking up the thermometer,” said Assistant Professor of Ignorametry Joe “Junior” Arapaio.

Mas…Shocking study links global warming and Latino immigration