¡Feliz Hispanic Latinx Heritage Month!
I thank God for helping me identify a previously-unrecognized Hispanic icon, a man who always embodied rebel cool, and my personal hero in that corny-ass show, Happy Days.
Gente, here are the Pocho Ocho Top Reasons I’m Quite Sure The Fonz Was Mexican-American:
8. Everybody calls him by a nickname
6. Leather jackets from Leon
Venezuela-based “transparency” website JuikiLiques dropped some big political bombshells this morning — the so-called “October Surprise.”
POCHO’s Especial Correspondents axed all the refryable sources to concoct this list, so check it out: The Pocho Ocho Top Juikiliques Bombshells:
8. Donald Trump’s plan to have “Mexico pay for the wall” relies on hiring Mexican workers, not paying them, and then deporting them, a scheme that worked so well in previous real estate projects.
7. Hillary Clinton threw away over 200 valuable AOL membership CDs and never told the FBI.
6. Donald Trump’s hairdresser, former airport cosmetologist Manila Envelopé, won’t use anything but Tres Flores mousse for Trump’s weave-over, but she removes the labels so the Donald won’t know.
Hey Old Lady!
Oh they think they are so friggin clever but I know what they are up to listening to me through my wifi and microwave well i have nothing to hide so neener neener Mr. and Ms. Big Brother politically correct death panel.
YOU WAN TO TAKE MY GUNNAWAY WELL HELL NO WE WONT GO. Don’t tase me bro hahah. I fought the law and law Juan. law Juan get it? Rock and roll will always die it will always be yakkity yak don’t talk back take out the papers and the trash or you dont get no steenkin cash. You have advice for me OLD LADY?
Why you smell like mota and not mocha? hahahaha.
Signed, Dada Doodoo
Dear Dodo Bird,
Que idiota! Have the drogas worn off yet? I don’t have time for your paranoid rants and raves. There are perfectly good street corners for you to stand on for spewing this kind of nonsense. Why don’t you go find one and leave me alone. Make sure you get there early before the OG vatos from Victory Outreach beat you to it. Better yet, stand on a corner opposite them and use your Mr. Microphone. I know you have one.