Pocho Ocho ways to tell you’re watching ‘Latino ñews’

twocastersIt’s no surprise to us Pochodores — it’s why we started POCHO.COM:

Actual research reveals more and more U.S. Latinos are getting their ñews in Ingles — ñews from respected journalists like brothers Jorge Cooper-Ramos (right), and Anderson Ramos-Cooper (left.)

OK, sometimes Latinos get their ñews from Gustavo Almadovar live in the O.C., but not lately.

Meanwhile, Univision is leading in the July ratings wars with the most viewers under 50, the first time a Spanish-language network topped the charts.

Demographics like these are the raison d’etre for FUSION, a soon-to-launch Latino-oriented English language network, a joint venture of ABC and Univision.

eliseputer200[Disclosure: FUSION is so chingon they kidnapped our MiJA, Elise Roedenbeck from New York,  hired her for a full time gig in Miami and also convinced POCHO Jefe-in-Chief Lalo Alcaraz to write a column for their website.]

It can be soooooooo confusing, so here are the Pocho Ocho telltale signs you’re watching “Latino ñews:”

8. Anchor babe cleavage and shimmying

7. When they say “Popo” they mean Popocatepetl and not the LAPD

6. Sports segment always includes one GOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAL

5. If you turn the volume down it looks like German TV news

4. Midgets and/or clowns

3. Celebrity Horoscopes! with Pitbull or Juanes

2. Brought to you by 1-800-ABOGADOS

And the numero uno way you can tell you’re watching “Latino ñews” is…

The newscast actually covers important news stories.