¡Orale! We’re getting $5.2 million for Christmas! (audio)

OMG! We’re getting a $5.2 million ATM Card for Christmas! Here are the deets:

GOOD DAY MY FRIEND.
How are you, and with your family,

All the arragement is done about your ATM CARD,there is no problem again
but i let you know that .

Our ATM DEPARTMENT OFFICE Benin republic here are delivery your ATM MASTER CARD
with very little amount If you are ready to receive it which can cost you $100
dollar only. Now i let you know that all your total Amount of your ATM CARD is
( $5.8 MILLION UNITED STATE DOLLAR ONLY ) so i let you know that to Activation
fee of ATM CARD before is $200 dollar in any country in this world wide. but
the COMMISSIONNER OF POLICE And MR IYA BONI PRESIDENCE of Benin republic
held a meeting with there Cabinet the cocultion is that the activation of
ATM CARD will be $100 dollar only.

Mas…¡Orale! We’re getting $5.2 million for Christmas! (audio)

The Easter Story: Why advertising to Hispanics sucks balls* [Updated]

fdahuevosTechnically, the word I should have used above, in the headline, is “Manipulates.” As in, “Safely Manipulate Your Balls When You Celebrate!”

That’s what the Federal Drug Administration advises this season, anyway. (Screen capture, above.)

But I’m a writer who has spent a lifetime in both advertising and journalism, and I know the value of good clickbait when I have it in my hands.

Er… Line of sight. Sorry, I’m distracted by the FDA advising me to fondle one’s nether regions for Easter.

Mas…The Easter Story: Why advertising to Hispanics sucks balls* [Updated]

Brazil TV guy tries to punk Mexicans with extra-picante salsa (video)


When a Brazilian TV guy tries to prank visiting Mexican futbol fans with what he thinks is super-spicy salsa, it turns out the joke is actually on him. What’s uber picante in Brazil, tu sabes, ranks as “meh” to Mexicanos. One intended victim actually thinks Brazil-boy’s salsa is kind of “sweet.”

PREVIOUSLY ON SALSA:

Mas…Brazil TV guy tries to punk Mexicans with extra-picante salsa (video)

True text message stories: Dude, what is your street name?

 

PREVIOUSLY ON TRUE TEXT MESSAGE STORIES:

Mas…True text message stories: Dude, what is your street name?

Naranjas, Señor?! Oranges for sale! (video)

The naranjero works hard for his money, so hard for it, honey.

As much as this street-vending orange seller looks like POCHO amigo Gustavo ¡Ask A Mexican! Arellano, it’s not him.

Here’s Arellano at his weekend gig:

Mas…Naranjas, Señor?! Oranges for sale! (video)

Letter to the Editor: All the arragement is done about your ATM CARD

GOOD DAY MY FRIEND.
How are you, and with your family,

All the arragement is done about your ATM CARD,there is no problem again 
but i let you know that .

Our ATM DEPARTMENT OFFICE Benin republic here are delivery your ATM MASTER CARD 
with very little amount If you are ready to receive it which can cost you $100 
dollar only. Now i let you know that all your total Amount of your ATM CARD is 
( $5.8 MILLION UNITED STATE DOLLAR ONLY ) so i let you know that to Activation 
fee of ATM CARD before is $200 dollar in any country in this world wide. but 
the COMMISSIONNER OF POLICE And MR IYA BONI PRESIDENCE of Benin republic 
held a meeting with there Cabinet the cocultion is that the activation of 
ATM CARD will be $100 dollar only.

Mas…Letter to the Editor: All the arragement is done about your ATM CARD

DYAC! Smartphone Spanglish spellcheck fails

Amor gone amok

I’m a pocha, loud and proud, and I communicate in Spanglish.

Everywhere. In letters, in conversation, in emails, in cards and, most recently, in text messages. But, my BlackBerry hates my Spanglish and is constantly trying to correct it. In fact, it often changes my Spanish words to random English words when I try to send my messages, rendering them practically intelligible. Damn you, auto correct!

A few choice examples: “gracias” into “grass,” “mañana” into “banana,” “mucho” into “macho,” “chingado” into “changed,” “oyes” into “ones” and “amor” into “amok.”

–Sara Inés

Mas…DYAC! Smartphone Spanglish spellcheck fails

CA Dream Act repeal fails to gather enough hateful signatures

Racist asshole signature failure

(SACRAMENTO) Republican Assemblyman Tim Donnelly announced today that his effort to repeal the California Dream Act, which allows undocumented students to apply for in-state tuition and scholarships in the state’s universities, has failed to collect enough signatures from racist assholes to get on the ballot.

Mas…CA Dream Act repeal fails to gather enough hateful signatures