Around Our Town: Puro Party Picks for Father’s Day Weekend 2017

fathersdaychurchsignFather and Son Chile-Eating Contest: Quién es más macho? The East Pocho Optimists Club once again sets up shop at Fernando Valenzuela Field for their annual chile-eating contest, which pits father-son teams against each other to see who can ascend the Picante Podium of Pain. The winning team wins even more chiles! Sunday, noon.

Bronche: Angry Bull cocktails (Red Bull, tequila, orange juice) are just $3 and dads get all the Mexican Meatloaf Sliders they want for free on Father’s Day at TGI Viernes in the Rancho Pocho Mall. Sunday 10 AM – 2 PM. Mention my name, Chale Knickerbocker, for a blank stare.

Mas…Around Our Town: Puro Party Picks for Father’s Day Weekend 2017

Around Our Town: Where to go, what to do on Mother’s Day weekend

momchurchsignBRUNCH: Nothing makes for a mellow mom like the All You Can Drink Micheladas Mother’s Day Brunch at stylish Bar Racho at the Ritchie Valens Hilton on East Olmos Boulevard.

Executive Jefe Gustaco Naranjero once again promises his extensive buffet featuring a soft and hard taco station, the always-popular Holy Habanero salsa challenge and the spectacular Flan Fountain.

New this year is the Fusion Fiesta featuring creations like the Banh Mi Burrito, the Tamales de Lox and the Philly Cheesesteak Chimichangas. Don’t miss the free giveaway of the new mini Tapatio espray bottles for when you absolutely, positively need to spice stuff up.

Mas…Around Our Town: Where to go, what to do on Mother’s Day weekend

Reagan tells Mex Prez on Cinco de Mayo: ‘Mi casa es su casa’ (video)

QUESTION: Why are Mexican rapists and drug dealers streaming North to enter the US of A illegally?

ANSWER: They were invited by “The Great Communicator.”

Check out this video about the 1988 Cinco de Mayo ceremony at the White House when Republican President Ronald Reagan told Mexican President Miguel de la Madrid Hurtado, “Mi casa es su casa.”

We all know how that worked out! #BUILDTHEWALL

Neighborhood Guatch: Where to go, what to do on St. Patrick’s Day

LUCK OF THE IRISH: Look for a pot o’ gold at the end of the rainbow today at Gustavo O’Grady’s Bar y Grill on East Olmos Boulevard. The popular hangout will serve corned beef tacos, potato-stuffed chiles rellenos and beer-marinated enchilada irlanda sliders at $1 each during Happy Hour.

Happy Hour, you lucky leprechauns, lasts all day long, and GO’G’s always keeps 100 bottles of beer on the wall.

For $144 and a signed damage waiver, you high-rollers can try GO’G’s One Night in Dublin Lifestyle Tasting Menu — generous pours of Guinness and Jameson’s followed by a course of impassioned story-telling and poetry, more pours, then a rich hour of melancholy singing, pours again, all capped off by your choice of a bar fight or vomiting in the alley.

Wear a wee bit o’ green and Gay Gus O’Grady himself will kiss your Blarney Stone.

Mas…Neighborhood Guatch: Where to go, what to do on St. Patrick’s Day

Orange President salutes Black History Month (transcript, audio, toon)

Our historic President knows more about Black History Month than the last President, who was not so historic.

And instead of teaching us in American, the President is going to speak English to you, you know, to class up the history of this carnage-loving people, his African-Americans.

Our speech researchers here at the National Pochismo Institute took Wednesday’s speech transcript and ran it through a text-to-speech thang with a British-accented robo-bloke. And it sounds classy! You’ve never heard classy as bigly as this — all the words — the best words — plus a Ben Carson shoutout — and some bragging, lots of lies, and ignorance in abundance. Not to mention dissing CNN and non sequitors, slang, and muddled thinking. You’re welcome, mate.

Mira el transcript, with notes from POCHO’s Comic Saenz, and audio below:

Mas…Orange President salutes Black History Month (transcript, audio, toon)

¡Orale! We’re getting $5.2 million for Christmas! (audio)

OMG! We’re getting a $5.2 million ATM Card for Christmas! Here are the deets:

How are you, and with your family,

All the arragement is done about your ATM CARD,there is no problem again
but i let you know that .

Our ATM DEPARTMENT OFFICE Benin republic here are delivery your ATM MASTER CARD
with very little amount If you are ready to receive it which can cost you $100
dollar only. Now i let you know that all your total Amount of your ATM CARD is
( $5.8 MILLION UNITED STATE DOLLAR ONLY ) so i let you know that to Activation
fee of ATM CARD before is $200 dollar in any country in this world wide. but
held a meeting with there Cabinet the cocultion is that the activation of
ATM CARD will be $100 dollar only.

Mas…¡Orale! We’re getting $5.2 million for Christmas! (audio)

OPINION: We’ve got to get back to the Hotel California

Return your focus to powerhouse California:
Don’t let post-election blues stop you in your tracks

As I write this, it appears the Democrats won the popular vote but lost the presidency, and did not gain control of the House or Senate.

The Democratic Party is INCLUSIVE – embracing all racial and ethnic groups and religions – and is PROGRESSIVE, looking forward and not looking back.

I think it’s important to keep that in mind: Let’s build a hopeful and enlightened future based upon knowledge and science, and not on desperation, ignorance, superstition, and outmoded colonialist notions.

As an educator who works with mostly newly arrived adults and their children to this country, I have the responsibility of ensuring they are not only able to communicate in English, but they are aware of their rights.

I share with them one of their choices, which is the pathway to citizenship and getting the right to vote, both hard-won and still having to be vigilantly protected by generations of women, blacks, Latinos, and Asians in this country.

Mas…OPINION: We’ve got to get back to the Hotel California

The secret to a perfect body? Try GENETICS™ (video)

You’ve tried a dozen different diets, you’ve exercised until you could barely walk, and yet the pounds and the inches stick around like bad karma or that weird kid Rob from ninth grade who stalks you on Facebook. What exactly is the secret to a perfect body? It’s simple: GENETICS™

What is it? UFO/OVNI photo’d over San Antonio high school (photos)

78312_submitter_file3__imageHave the Space Brothers come to straighten out a screwed-up America and an especially messed-up Lone Star State? Were they here Monday?

Photos submitted to MUFON sure show something strange in the skies over a San Antonio high school named after the racist traitor Robert E. Lee. [All photos are minimized on this page. Click on an image to biggify.]

Here’s what the eyewitness/photographer reported to the Mutual UFO Network, and all of his photos:

Mas…What is it? UFO/OVNI photo’d over San Antonio high school (photos)