Cultura

It’s Not News to Us

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Mijo’s Manly Breakfast Burrito

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The other day mijo say he gwanted a burrito for breakfast.

“OK,” I say, and I start to look for my refry beans.

“No,” mijo say. That is the burrito you make me gwhen I was little.”

“Ju don’t like it?” I say.

“I gwant somesing more like for a man.”

“A man?”

“Ju know, a man that goes to gwork and he has a burrito wrapped in aluminio.” (That’s aluminum foil for ju pochos).

Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Mijo’s Manly Breakfast Burrito

Jesus, please! What do you mean ‘No Easter Bunny?’ (video)

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When Juanita Carmelita throws an Easter party for the kids, she’s expecting the Easter Bunny to make a guest appearance. But the costume store is out of bunny costumes, so a long-haired bearded Savior-looking guy in robes shows up instead. Dare we expect . . . . a MIRACLE? [Frankie Quiñones stars as Juanita Carmelita.]

PREVIOUSLY ON JUANITA CARMELITA:

Mas…Jesus, please! What do you mean ‘No Easter Bunny?’ (video)

Hebrew homies Jaquann and Luis make matzo balls (NSFW video)

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On Passover (“Pesach” in Hebrew), los Judios eat “bitter herbs” to remember “the bitterness of slavery in Egypt.” In this video, Hebrew homeboys Jaquann and Luis start out with a sweeter herb and then have to satisfy their munchies with matzo balls. Passover starts Monday night a little after 4:20 — sundown, to be exact. (NSFW drugs and language.)

Keep your burrito safe and warm with a Burrito Buddy™ (infomerical)

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Skip the drama of dining disasters with the new Outdoor Research Burrito Buddy™, featuring the patented Burrito Heat-O Technology for both infinitely hot Mexican goodness and fingertip burn prevention.

The Burrito Buddy’s sturdy, carnage-proof construction prevents lunchtime leakage or breakage, and a convenient food fastener plays it safe with a zippered closure. Plus, the Burrito Buddy™ is enveloped by a gentle swaddling design that protects your meal with some good old-fashioned TLC. Save your sweat for the salsa – your burrito is in good hands.

Kids aren’t born racist. Hate is something they learn (photo)

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Nick and I told Sophia that after 1 whole month of going poop on the potty, she could pick out a special prize at Target. She, of course, picked a new doll. The obsession is real. While we were checking out, the cashier asked Sophia if she was going to a birthday party. We both gave her a blank stare. She then pointed to the doll and asked Sophia if she picked her out for a friend. Sophia continued to stare blankly and I let the cashier know that she was a prize for Sophia being fully potty trained. The woman gave me a puzzled look and turned to Sophia and asked, "Are you sure this is the doll you want, honey?" Sophia finally found her voice and said, "Yes, please!" The cashier replied, "But she doesn't look like you. We have lots of other dolls that look more like you." I immediately became angry, but before I could say anything, Sophia responded with, "Yes, she does. She's a doctor like I'm a doctor. And I'm a pretty girl and she's a pretty girl. See her pretty hair? And see her stethoscope?" Thankfully the cashier decided to drop the issue and just answer, "Oh, that's nice." This experience just confirmed my belief that we aren't born with the idea that color matters. Skin comes in different colors just like hair and eyes and every shade is beautiful. #itswhatsontheinsidethatcounts #allskinisbeautiful #teachlove #teachdiversity #thenextgenerationiswatching

A post shared by Brandi Benner (@leilani324) on

The Barrio Nostalgia of ‘Veteranas and Rucas’ on Instagram

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The internet is so much about what to look at.

For me, that’s weird. You see the bulk of the first part of my life was bound up with reading—which is all about looking at things, reading words, but has little to do with seeing, with reading pictures.

It is true that as a kid, I was all about reading while seeing, with Richie Rich, Mad Magazine, Vampirella, Batman, Eerie, and Plop! infecting the technicolor corridors of my imagination.

But after that came college and graduate school with a major in literature—so novels took over (that and critical theory), so words came to dominate the scene of my life.

Mas…The Barrio Nostalgia of ‘Veteranas and Rucas’ on Instagram

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