Post by Being Chicano.
The naranjero works hard for his money, so hard for it, honey.
As much as this street-vending orange seller looks like POCHO amigo Gustavo ¡Ask A Mexican! Arellano, it’s not him.
Here’s Arellano at his weekend gig:
Cultura
It’s Not News to Us
And now a generic commercial from some brand (video)
At [insert company name here] we care about the __________, the __________ and the ___________ so you and your family can ____________ and the world _______________.
[Your mileage may vary. This product is meant for educational purposes only. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental. Void where prohibited. Some assembly required. List each check separately by bank number. Batteries not included. Contents may settle during shipment. Use only as directed. No other warranty expressed or implied. Do not use while operating a motor vehicle or heavy equipment.
Attention Latino ‘Millennials’: Is this your story? (video)
Telemundo says it knows the secret to attracting the Millennial generation — so advertisers and marketeers can sell more product. (Spoiler: The secret word is 3BALL MTY.) What do you think? Is this video about you?
But wait! What does Univision have to say?
Mas…Attention Latino ‘Millennials’: Is this your story? (video)
Don’t call me a ‘Mexican,’ America! Also, I’m not a ‘Latino’
It’s a phenomenon older than the United Estates of America. We’ve named it Looking Down On More Recent Immigrants Syndrome:
- In 1751, Founding Father Benjamin Franklin, a North American colonial with British roots, disparaged “stupid” and “swarthy” recently-arrvied German immigrants, who, he wrote, were too dumb to learn English, and did we mention they were “swarthy”?
- Discrimination against Irish Catholic immigrants by their English Protestant predecessors was one of the reasons 200 fresh-off-the-boat Irish United States Army draftees switched sides and fought for Mexico in the Mexican-American War of the 1840s. These deserters/heroes formed the famed Saint Patrick’s Battalion (Los San Patricios.)
- Hoity-toity German and Sephardic Jews who immigrated to the U.S.A. in the 18th and 19th Centuries were ashamed of the Hebrew homies who arrived later from Eastern Europe; the assimilated Jews banded together to “Americanize” the Russian and Polish immigrants in the 1880s.
Last week three latter-day Looking Down Syndrome sightings lit up our screen, INSISTENT MESSAGES from people who want you to know THEY ARE DEFINITELY NOT THOSE OTHER PEOPLE OVER THERE — those Mexicans and/or Latinos.
Mas…Don’t call me a ‘Mexican,’ America! Also, I’m not a ‘Latino’
Vatos Locos International: Meet Thailand’s ‘cholos’ (NSFW videos)
What do a Buddhist meditation teacher and a Thai policeman have in common? They both think they are “Mexican gangsters” because tats, Pendletons, leaning like a cholo and saying “Fuck the popo!” [NSFW lyrics and explicit subtitles in English.]
Ditto two Armenian gang-bangers who were deported from Southern California back to the Old World; these vatos locos are fighting for Bashar al-Assad in Syria:
Mas…Vatos Locos International: Meet Thailand’s ‘cholos’ (NSFW videos)
Danny Trejo: Action movie star, ‘Breadanimal’ maker (video)
We don’t know what to make of this video from Danny Trejo, where the machete-wielding movie tough guy reveals an improbable hobby: making Breadanimals. It’s a promo, somehow, for his new flick, Bullet, but it seems less funny than awkward and forced.
He doesn’t look like a happy camper to us. What do you think?
PREVIOUSLY ON DANNY TREJO, WE’RE HAPPY TO REMIND YOU ABOUT ONE OF THE GREATEST ONLINE PROMO VIDEOS EVER MADE THAT TAKES A LONG TIME FOR THE *FLASH* FILE TO LOAD BUT IS TOTALLY WORTH IT SO HANG IN THERE:
Mas…Danny Trejo: Action movie star, ‘Breadanimal’ maker (video)
Up close and personal with Chilean Rose, full-body stripper (video)
So Chilean Rose, what’s up? That’s a good tarantula. Calm down now. What? Is something wrong? You seem nervous. Take it off. Take it ALL off!
Lisa Lisa/Cult Jam: I Wonder If I Take You Home (video)
Lisa Lisa and Cult Jam is an iconic Latino group. At the forefront of “freestyle,” Lisa Velez fronted the group, which released the album Lisa Lisa & Cult Jam with Full Force.
Women’s History Month: Sister Megan Rice (toon)
Megan Gillespie Rice (born January 31, 1930) is an anti-nuclear activist and Roman Catholic nun of the Society of the Holy Child Jesus. On February 18, 2014, Rice was sentenced to 35 months in prison for breaking into the Y-12 National Security Complex in Oak Ridge, Tennessee, spray-painting antiwar slogans, and splashing blood on the outside of the heavily-guarded Highly Enriched Uranium Materials Facility.
BSAA airliner over Andes transmits ‘S T E N D E C’ in Morse, vanishes
They called her Star Dust.
The British South American Airways (BSAA) Avro Lancastrian airliner (registration G-AGWH) took off from Buenos Aires, Argentina enroute to Santiago, Chile on August 2, 1947.
Star Dust’s final Morse code transmission to Santiago airport, S T E N D E C, was received by the control tower four minutes prior to its planned landing and repeated twice:
… – . -. -.. . -.-.
… – . -. -.. . -.-.
The Morse transmission sounded just like this:
Star Dust — like Malaysian Airlines Flight MH370 and Argentina’s Cadet Flight — was never heard from again.
And what does S T E N D E C mean? No one knew then, no one knows now.
Mas…BSAA airliner over Andes transmits ‘S T E N D E C’ in Morse, vanishes
Women’s History Month: The Shrine of the Boob (video, photos)
They’re not Salma Hayek’s breasts, but slight, elegant Japanese tetas. They deserve a shrine of their own — a boob shrine.
Located in Soja City, in Japan’s Okayama Prefecture, Karube Shrine is dedicated to Chichigamisama, the Goddess of Breasts.
Mas…Women’s History Month: The Shrine of the Boob (video, photos)
Puro Pinche Oldie: Brown Brothers of Soul’s ‘Ese Cholo’ (video)
This groovy instrumental featuring a Hammond organ, very much in the late 1960s early 1970s Green Onions and Shotgun groove, is from the The Brown Brothers of Soul. It’s called Ese Cholo.
Mas…Puro Pinche Oldie: Brown Brothers of Soul’s ‘Ese Cholo’ (video)
BBC Video: Early spring nourishes bumper Swiss spaghetti crop
Global warming — and an early warm Spring — means a bountiful spaghetti harvest in Switzerland’s pasta-growing regions near the border with Italy. The BBC reports.
Denis and Gabrielle dance a pre-teen cha-cha for Spring (video)
It’s Vernal Equinox 2014 — the beginning of Spring. Let’s dance, like pre-teen “Latin Dance” competitors Denis and Gabrielle.
Dear Photoshop Experts: Can you turn the background black? (photos)
I
t starts at PhotoshopRequest.com.
An innocent netizen asks for help with a photo, like Danilo here, who writes in requesting the Photoshop experts insert a black background into a snapshot:
req. help
help guys
i would like to turn black background this photo but i don't how T-T
pls anyone help me
heres the picture
Danilo’s request gets a prompt reply with a new, Photoshopped image:
Mas…Dear Photoshop Experts: Can you turn the background black? (photos)
Ugly Mexicans and sexy gringas — pulp fiction history of hate (toons)
Bill “Memo” Nericcio, author, professor at San Diego State University and proprietor of the Tex[t]-Mex Gallery Blog, collects representations of Mexican-Americans in pop culture.
He just posted a set of scanned 1936-37 covers from pulp fiction magazine Spicy Western Stories and its siblings that all exploit the same stereotype — the leering (ugly) (brown) bandido and the (scantily-clad) (white) chica/victim in distress. Hate much?
The image above is just one slice of the four covers Memo found; the big images of all four are below (click to enlarge):
Mas…Ugly Mexicans and sexy gringas — pulp fiction history of hate (toons)
It’s not so easy being ‘Invisible’ in Bogota, Colombia (video)
Sure, being Invisible is chingon and all, but what if you meet that special woman you’d like to get to know a little bit better … but she can’t see you?
The Irish heroes of Aztlan: The San Patricio Batallón (music videos)
This corrido by Orange County Celtic-rock homies The Fenians tells the brave and tragic story of the San Patricios, the St. Patrick’s Battalion, formed and led by Jon Riley, a unit of 200 or so mostly Catholic Irish immigrants who fought as part of the Mexican Army against the United States in the Mexican–American War. Most of the battalion’s members had deserted or defected from the United States Army. (Wikipedia.)
Scots-British post-punk The Wakes Band offer their version of the story next. The video’s not much to look at but the lyrics are killer, so read along below:
Mas…The Irish heroes of Aztlan: The San Patricio Batallón (music videos)
Chinga! Pizza Patron’s slangy ‘La Chingona’ ad scares the squares
The last time POCHO mentioned Pizza Patron was when they pissed people off by advertising free pepperoni pies on June 5, 2012 if you ordered en Español. Elise Roedenbeck covered the story and noted the Pocho Ocho other things you can get for speaking Spanish.
Now the Dallas-based chain is back in the news with a controversial advertising campaign — set to debut at the end of this month — for a loaded pie called La Chingona, a $7.99 large pizza with approximately 90 slices of proprietary jalapeño stuffed pepperoni topped with fresh, diced jalapeños. The company says CBS and Univision refuse to run their radio commercials because the use of the C-word F’s up their chonies.
Mas…Chinga! Pizza Patron’s slangy ‘La Chingona’ ad scares the squares
LatinoUSA w/ @SaraChicaD: Latinas in Tech, Live @ SXSW (audio)
It can be hard for Latinos to break into the field of tech, they often lack social capital and funding.
Tech writer Sara Inés Calderon (photo) and DIY Girls founder Luz Rivas join Latino USA host Maria Hinojosa for our live show in Austin to talk about these obstacles and why they believe being a Latino is actually an asset in the world of engineering and innovation.
Screw Dora the Explorer and her pinche monkey too
I’ve got a problem with Dora the Explorer. I know you do too.
What the hell is the matter with television’s longest running bilingual toon whore?
This passive-aggressive little cow yells too much.
She asks a question, then waits silently for the answer while staring at you like a creep. I swear she can see me through the TV screen!
This unemployed bitch has been on air for almost 13 years now and she hasn’t figured out why her backpack is on acid and why her pet monkey stole her boots.
Ask the monkey, it fucking talks, dumbass!
Lalo Alcaraz: How to draw a cartoon character (video)
POCHO Jefe-in-Chief Lalo Alcaraz offers a quick lesson in creating and drawing your own cartoon character.
PREVIOUSLY ON LALO DRAWS:
Expectation Management: Secret path to happiness (video)
Elise Roedenbeck (@Buttronica on the Twitter) reveals the one little secret to happiness that can change your outlook forever. After all, the lower your expectations, the less chance you have of being disappointed.
PREVIOUSLY ON @BUTTRONICA:
Mas…Expectation Management: Secret path to happiness (video)
The Idiot’s Guide to Smart People: ‘Politics’ (video)
Did you know that “politics” is the smart person word for “yelling about the government”? Watch and learn.
PREVIOUSLY ON POLITICAL SCIENCE VIDEO THEATRE:
Rare color footage from the 1940s: Frida Kahlo dances (video)
Although Frida Kahlo was seriously injured in a traffic accident as teenager, she never let her physical challenges hold her back. “I was born a bitch. I was born a painter,” she said. In this recently-discovered color footage, most likely from the 1940s, the artist revealed herself as a provocative dancer — with a signature style.
PREVIOUSLY ON FRIDA KAHLO:
Mas…Rare color footage from the 1940s: Frida Kahlo dances (video)
Retro rockers Cutty Flam go to the prom: ‘Robot Heart’ (video)
Suburban band Cutty Flam, the Rock n’ Roll sound track to a 1950’s B-Movie starring Ritchie Valens opposite Betty Page directed by Quentin Tarantino, offer this new video for Robot Heart. It’s about life, loss, death and going to the prom, plus it’s easy to slow-dance to. (Video by Jose Emmanuel Varela for BrotherScienceTV and Cutty Flam.)
PREVIOUSLY ON CUTTY FLAM ROBOT HEART:
Mas…Retro rockers Cutty Flam go to the prom: ‘Robot Heart’ (video)
Our quest for photos of cactus cakes and cupcakes
Alana Jones-Mann’s DIY: House Plant Cupcakes (photo) were the first to prick our interest when we saw them last week, so we went on a quest for more cactus cupcake photos. (Alana, by the way, is unsurpassed in capturing the true desaturated green-blue color nuances of actual cacti.)
This succulent-looking delectable is on Craftsy.com via Lola T.: