¡Orale! We’re getting $5.2 million for Christmas! (audio)

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OMG! We’re getting a $5.2 million ATM Card for Christmas! Here are the deets:

GOOD DAY MY FRIEND.
How are you, and with your family,

All the arragement is done about your ATM CARD,there is no problem again
but i let you know that .

Our ATM DEPARTMENT OFFICE Benin republic here are delivery your ATM MASTER CARD
with very little amount If you are ready to receive it which can cost you $100
dollar only. Now i let you know that all your total Amount of your ATM CARD is
( $5.8 MILLION UNITED STATE DOLLAR ONLY ) so i let you know that to Activation
fee of ATM CARD before is $200 dollar in any country in this world wide. but
the COMMISSIONNER OF POLICE And MR IYA BONI PRESIDENCE of Benin republic
held a meeting with there Cabinet the cocultion is that the activation of
ATM CARD will be $100 dollar only.

Mas…¡Orale! We’re getting $5.2 million for Christmas! (audio)

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Oh jes! Thanksgiving turkey al pastor tacos

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lenchatacosHappy Mexican Thanksgiving Day!

Is Tia Lencha here. Gwhat is Mexican Thanksgiving Day you ask? Is Thanksgiving but with all Mexican food. What?!?! My gringo frends say. Oh no! How you can do that! Is crazy! And Tia Lencha say, no really.

When I help mijo with his homeworks, I learn that Thanksgiving come from a Puritan holiday in Englands. When it was the Reformation the Protestantes wanted to throw away all the Catholic holidays, even Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny!

Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Oh jes! Thanksgiving turkey al pastor tacos

John F. Kennedy in Houston and Dallas, TX November 21-22, 1963

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jfklulac


Tina Adame couldn’t stop smiling hours after meeting President John F. Kennedy and First Lady Jackie Kennedy.

The First Couple surprised Mexican American guests at a LULAC gala in Houston, and Tina went over every detail to anyone who listened the next morning at the engineering firm where she worked.

The president spoke about the importance of Hispanics in the country, she said. Then, Jackie addressed the crowd in Spanish. “It was magical,” Tina recalled.

Her boss, a Kennedy critic, overheard her talking about the visit to co-workers. “So, you got close to the president?” he asked. “Did you shoot him?”

Mas…John F. Kennedy in Houston and Dallas, TX November 21-22, 1963

Dear Trump Voter Ashley: We are real people, not your ‘Taco Tuesday’

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familyguytacosDear Ashley,

I don’t really know you very well. I met you for the first time when my family and I travelled to Rogers, Arkansas to see you marry my nephew. I knew my nephew at some point. I saw him grow up here in Los Angeles until my brother and his wife thought the streets of Woodland Hills too gang-infested and uprooted their entire family to the enclaves of my sister-in-law’s home state.

Shortly after, sometime in the 1990s, my mother and I travelled to Arkansas on an Amtrak train for two days (don’t ask – I still haven’t forgiven my mother for refusing to fly) to visit and see our family’s new dwellings.

You weren’t in the picture yet – your husband was still a teenager. Despite the torturous train ride, we relished the opportunity to spend time with my brother and his family. We were even excited to see a new part of the country.

Mas…Dear Trump Voter Ashley: We are real people, not your ‘Taco Tuesday’

FTP Local #207 taps ‘Mainstream Media’ for 2016 Golden Dookie Award

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sparkleturd (PNS reporting from BEVERLY HILLS) Local #207 of the Federation of Turd Polishers (FTP) has chosen “The Mainstream Media” as the recipient of their 2016 Golden Dookie Award, PNS has learned.

The union will cite the news media’s whitewashing of Donald Trump’s hate, xenophobia, racial prejudice, misogyny, lies, bullying, sexual assault, fraud, and foreign entanglements as “the new normal.”

“They polished the shit right off of that turd,” one FTP official told PNS.

Mas…FTP Local #207 taps ‘Mainstream Media’ for 2016 Golden Dookie Award

Loyalty and Loathing: Is Donald Trump the new Fidel Castro?

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saluteSince Donald Trump’s astonishing rise to power, there is only one other public figure I can recall that has drawn such extremes of loyalty and loathing: Fidel Castro in his prime.

I will no doubt get an avalanche of criticism from my fellow Cuban-Americans for making this observation. But that simply proves my point. Although at opposite ends of the political spectrum, both men are lightning rods for polarization. Their similarities are in political style, not ideology.

“…THEIR IMPULSIVE PERSONALITIES WERE CATNIP TO THE MEDIA.”

Mas…Loyalty and Loathing: Is Donald Trump the new Fidel Castro?

Pocho Ocho Top Tunes on Obama’s forthcoming jazz CD

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(PNS reporting from WASHINGTON D.C.) President Barack Obama will launch a new career when his term ends — a career as a jazz saxophonist, PNS has learned.

Insiders at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue say the president has been spending almost every weekend for the last six months practicing his tenor saxophone, a gift from former President Bill Clinton, rehearsing, and recording with his band. His first CD — Barry Blows the Blues — will drop January 21, the day after Donald Trump’s inauguration.

Sources tell us these are the Pocho Ocho Top Tunes — recorded in “Living Stereo” — featured on Barry Blows the Blues:

8. Yes, I Kenya

7. Livin’ in a Cracker’s Paradise

6. Michelle

Mas…Pocho Ocho Top Tunes on Obama’s forthcoming jazz CD

People say: ‘Tia Lencha, what does ju say about Donal Tromp?’

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tialencha300I say there are racists, or Marxists, or Russia-level fascists
An orange glo-worm that hashes and dashes.

“Hey Beaner,” said the weiner, “go back to Mexico!”
Three gueros in a car. I yell back at the guero,
“Oh yeah? Thas not bery far.”

And the white people say, there’s no racists, or Marxists,
Or Russia level fascists, no orange colored glo-worm
That hashes and dashes

Mas…People say: ‘Tia Lencha, what does ju say about Donal Tromp?’

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