Was it inevitable? Nevertheless, here it is: El Chapo Fat ‘n’ Furious, a new smartphone video game.
We’ll let the creators tell the story:
In a 16-bits graphic vintage style, which perfectly syncs to the shifted-tone gameplay, the player finds himself in the shoes of El Chapo on the day of his escape. As he gets on his bike the mad rush begins!
Sources tell our correspondents that Guzman’s narcotrafficante associates are already working on plans to bust the gangster out of his next cellblock; we’ve compiled this list of the Pocho Ocho Top Ways El Chapo Could Escape Again:
8. Trained bats
7. Incredible shrinking ray
6. Those gigantor worms from Tremors
This video was delayed by Customs for reasons, but we’re happy to bring it to you now. Celebrate Mexican Independence Day with fugitive drug lord El Chapo, his crew, and his special tricolor cupcakes!
Like many American songs ostensibly about Old Mexico, this song is really about America. San Francisco’s eclectic The Waybacks, like all smart outlaws, cross the Rio Grande to hook up with like-minded Compadres in the Sierra Madre. Swinging arrangement, cowboy lyrics? Could this be Western Swing?
Here are the lyrics and chords in case you want to swing along:
Chilling black and white documentary footage from Spain shows how a thoughtful gesture by a scarecrow becomes the scarecrow’s literal undoing. But oh mama, could this really be The End?
The best defense is good offense, pochos. Watch and learn!
If only these undocumented immigrants had seen the video before they got stopped in the middle of Oklahoma!