Here are the Pocho Ocho reasons why:
PREVIOUSLY BY JIMWICH:
(PNS reporting from AUSTIN) The Texas Senate is set to pass legislation to ban “non-traditional” colored sneakers on the chamber floor.
Sen. Dan Ireland (R-Dallas) introduced Senate Bill 5 to “raise sartorialism of the chamber by mandating the use of traditional colors of sneakers.”
The Texas legislature has begun its second special session to push through legislation that sent thousands of Texans to the Capitol to protest last week. Ireland called these Texans the “unruly mob, whose decorum and multi-colored footwear, left much to be desired.”
SB5 “mandates that all sneakers worn shall be plain white.”
We already told you about the attempt to outlaw “looking too Mexican,” but that’s not the only trick the Republicans have up their (cotton-poly-blend) sleeves.
From our Ostin Especial Correspondents — this just in — here are the GOP’s Pocho Ocho new proposals for Texas:
8. Henceforth, the value for Pi π shall, for efficiency purposes, be rounded down to 3.00; additionally only apple pi is permitted
7. SB666, dubbed the “God Is My Co-Pilot Bill,” requires a Gideon Bible in every glove compartment
6. Hug a tree, go to jail
It’s not easy standing up for women’s rights in Texas, but the heroic filibuster by State Sen. Wendy Davis kept the GOP’s anti-abortion SB5 from passing Tuesday night. Our MiJA, Elise Roedenbeck, learned how to Do the Wendy for the camera. [Disclosure: The settlement agreement approved by the judge means we must stay at least 100 yards away from Ms. Roedenbeck, but we can still remind people that she is POCHO’s New Jack City Burro Jefe, Emeritus.]
The Daily Show’s Senior Latino Correspondent Al Madrigal goes to Washington, D.C. to meet with demonstrators who want Puerto Rico to become America’s 51st state. [Disclaimer: Al is POCHO’s Migrant Editor.]