Is this the new iPhone 5 AKA iPhone La Raza?

by HERB DERP on September 12, 2012 in El Now, Pocho Ñews Service

(PNS reporting from SILICON VALLEY) Apple fanboys, Wall Street, tech geeks and Samsung engineers are eagerly awaiting Apple’s announcement of a new iPhone model today, and some inside sources are predicting a breakthrough product aimed at the growing Latino market.

The iPhone 5 — code-named iPhone La Raza — is said to include these new features:

  • Internal clock can be calibrated to Greenwich Mean Time or Chicano Time
  • All phones feature Spanglish-enchanced auto-correct. You can safely type pinche puto in an email without having the system change it to pink putter, or correct queso emergency.
  • Angry Birds has been “ethnicized.” Meet Angry Abuelitas.
  • Changes in internals and structural design mean the iPhone La Raza rides both lower and slower.
  • New composite-manufacturing technology means Apple will offer an additional color besides black and white — Pendleton.

iPhone voice assistant Siri (Hernandez) refused to comment on the rumors. Apple founder Steve Jobs (photo, right) was unavailable at press time.

POCHO ÑEWS SERVICE PNS IS A WHOLLY-FICTITIOUS SUBSIDIARY OF POCHISMO INC., A CALIFORNIA CORPORATION, WHO IS A PERSON ACCORDING TO THE SUPREME COURT.  DON’T ASK US, WE JUST WORK HERE.

Previous post:

Next post: