COMIC SAENZ
Taco Bell introduces new Artisanal Soft-Shell Tacos (photo)
Taco Bell’s latest offering — Artisanal Soft-Shell Tacos — became available in several test markets across America today. The proprietary softening process uses only natural organic softeners (shown here being applied by a Taco Bell artisan chef) to turn crispy Cool Ranch Doritos taco shells into something foldable, stuffable and, ultimately, eatable. Try some today!
Are UFO/OVNIs flying into the Popocatepetl volcano AGAIN? (video)
That Popocatepetl OVNI/UFO that wasn’t really there last time is back again, captured over the weekend by the 24/7 PopoCam. This time, the “optical illusion” — or whatever they end up calling it — heads from outer espace PAST the smoldering crater and then hangs a U-TURN before diving into the volcano.
PREVIOUSLY ON EL POPO UFO/OVNI WATCH:
Mas…Are UFO/OVNIs flying into the Popocatepetl volcano AGAIN? (video)
Criança de 2 anos canta ‘Don’t Let Me Down,’ dos Beatles (video)
This two-year-old Brazilian kid rocks the classic Don’t Let Me Down dos Beatles.
Thanks to Gabacho Borracho for the link!
Hey you with the ‘public display of affection’ — don’t do that! (video)
Hey, you two! Get a room! (From España with love, but not too much.)
Luchador Peatonito is Mexico City’s ‘Defender of Pedestrians’ (video)
In Mexico City, a superhero luchador fights for the rights of pedestrians.
The Wall Street Journal reports:
If you ever get stuck in gridlock at an intersection in this crowded capital city, you can’t expect help from a street cop. But you might try “Peatónito,” the protector of pedestrians who dresses as a Mexican wrestler.
When a car blocks a crosswalk, from out of nowhere appears Peatónito (“little pedestrian” in Spanish), in a cape and wrestler’s mask. He stands directly in front of the car and tries to push it back with his bare hands—often to the astonishment of the drivers. If a motorbike is parked on the sidewalk blocking the way, Peatónito lifts it up and puts it on the curb where it belongs.
Mas…Luchador Peatonito is Mexico City’s ‘Defender of Pedestrians’ (video)
When goats attack, it’s no laughing matter! Well, actually… (video)
As you can see from this video, these goats seem to have something against people. Is that Portuguese they’re speaking?
New! Hands-free Whopper™ makes eating junk food easy! (video)
Today’s world is all about the multi-tasking! You want to Tweet. You want to play your guitar. You want to walk the perros. You want to give your customer a puro tat. And you want to eat a delicious Whopper™ from Burger King. No worries, meng. The hands-free Whopper™ is here!
It’s End of May Day! Donate to POCHO now to help us break the ñews!
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Can you donate $20 or $50 so we can make more ñews y satire? |
With only hours left in the Merry Merry Month of May, please make a small donation now so we can continue breaking the ñews! POCHO needs money to upgrade our webservers, money to fix our broken computers and, more than anything, money to pay our editors and writers and videographers and cartoonists who have contributed a year and a half’s worth of amazingly chingon content for free.
Every $10, $20 or $50 helps. Click on the donate button now. Thank you, pochos!
Pocho Ocho best summer activities for teenage boys
School is mostly over and Summer is mostly here. How can pocho parents keep a teenage boy busy?
Here’s our list of the Pocho Ocho best summer activities for your teenage boy:
8. Get a tat
7. Join a gang
6. Hock a loogie
Mexican cuisine in Alta California: Not what you think (video)
Here in San Angeles there would be no restaurants without Mexicans in the kitchen. But they’re not cooking what you think.
Lion meat tacos in Tampa, FL only $35 each! (video)
If you’re hungry in Tampa, FL — and we mean really hungry, king of the jungle hungry — stop by Taco Fusion for lion meat tacos. And camel. And ostrich…
Breaking: Princeton handyman sues hospital for loss of hand
(PNS reporting from PRINCETON) Area handyman Alfredo Serricchio (photo) plans to sue Princeton–Plainsboro Teaching Hospital (PPTH) for the “egregious medical malpractice” that resulted in the amputation of his right hand, his lawyer announced Tuesday.
“He’s just this hard-working, formerly right-handed immigrant who was fixing a rich doctor’s roof and the next thing you know he has only one hand, and it’s his left hand!” attorney John E. Brockman told PNS.
“He’s a handyman for Pete’s sake! You can’t be a handyman without a hand! That is indubitably egregious, irresponsible, unconscionable and irrefutable, and we think it’s worth six million dollars!”
Alfredo, a construction worker at Dr. Lisa Cuddy’s house, had complained on Sept. 27, 2005 that his asthma was acting up, and then fell off the roof onto the concrete. At PPTH he could not breathe, and Cuddy noticed two of the fingers on his right hand turned purple, according to Brockman. “His glove didn’t fit,” he said. “They had to admit.”
Mas…Breaking: Princeton handyman sues hospital for loss of hand
Xochitl Julisa Bermejo: ‘Our Lady of the Water Gallons’ (video)
Xochitl Julisa Bermejo is a poet and teacher from Asuza, CA who volunteered with No More Deaths, a humanitarian organization providing water bottles in the Arizona desert where immigrants crossing from Mexico often die of exposure. She read her poem Our Lady of the Water Gallons at a Mental Cocido (Mental Stew) gathering of Latino authors.
Elise @buttronica Roedenbeck’s ‘MiJA Weekly’ now on Fusion (video)
Our video sweetheart, Elise @buttronica Roedenbeck, is back with MiJA Weekly — now on Fusion, the mutant offspring of ABC and Univision. Our girl’s back in her old room in her mom’s house in Miami, and boy are her arms tired! On Twitter, she’s @buttronica
Mexclusive en Español: ‘Star Trek Into Darkness con Tribbles’ (video)
To boldly go where no hombre has gone before — Estrella Viaje.
Fried axolotl, you’re the juan, you make dinner full of yum (photos)
Wikipedia: The [totally cute] axolotl, or Mexican salamander (Ambystoma mexicanum) is a neotenic salamander, closely related to the tiger salamander.
Larvae of this species fail to undergo metamorphosis, so the adults remain aquatic and gilled.
It is also called ajolote [ɑːhɒˈlɔte] (which is also a common name for different types of salamander).
The species originates from numerous lakes, such as Lake Xochimilco underlying Mexico City.
Axolotls are used extensively in scientific research due to their ability to regenerate limbs.
They are also totally delicious when deep-fried in Osaka, Japan:
Mas…Fried axolotl, you’re the juan, you make dinner full of yum (photos)
Advice for guys: All she wants you to do is listen, not fix it (video)
Attention all dudes: She just wants to share and she wants you to just listen. You don’t have to FIX EVERY PINCHE PROBLEM!
Al Madrigal and ex-MSNBC Dylan Ratigan: Cable news blues (video)
What in the hell is wrong with angry young cable news guy Dylan Ratigan, who quit fame and fortune at MSNBC to become a hydroponic farmer who employs veterans? The Daily Show’s Al Madrigal goes to farmville to find out. [Disclosure: Madrigal is also POCHO’s Migrant Editor.]
Immigrant-loving John McCain sings: ‘You’re Our Guest!’ (music video)
The Republican Senator from the Hate State of Arizona, John McCain, is one of the “Gang of Eight” senators behind the new immigration reform bill. Today his office released this love song to the “new voters” he wants to legalize.
Immigration Bill clears Senate committee on way to becoming law
(PNS reporting from WASHINGTON) A bruised, battered and patched-up Immigration Bill cleared a major hurdle Tuesday as a bipartisan 13-5 vote kicked Bill out of the Judiciary Committee and onto the Senate floor.
POCHO caught up with Bill in his dressing room after the committee vote and got him to agree to a short, on-the-record interview:
POCHO: You sleazed past the tricky gay partner trap, you sucked up to the high tech lobby, you bribed the security-is-our-business government contractors and now you’re one step closer to becoming a law. So how does it feel?
IMMIGRATION BILL: What do you want me to say? I’m just a Bill, I’m just a Bill and I’m sitting here on Capitol Hill.
POCHO: How do you get the strength to maintain day after day? What’s your secret?
Mas…Immigration Bill clears Senate committee on way to becoming law
Negrito: Sometimes you feel like an Afro, sometimes you don’t (video)
In Mexico, Grupo Bimbo’s Negrito brand chocolate candy bars are delicious AND good for your hair! All sales final. Hoodie not included.
Piñata Protest: ‘La Cucaracha (marijuana que fumar)’ [music video]
Check it out: One frantic minute of punk-cumbia La Cucaracha (marijuana que fumar) by Piñata Protest. They are from San Antonio, TX, not that there’s anything wrong with that.
Ask Google: Why do Mexicans stare and eat beans?
What did we ever do before the Google? Where did a poor pre-Googlite go to find out the big answers and the meaning of Life, the Universe and Everything? Actually, we could Google that. But why even hypothesize? Google has the answers we want today and knows the questions we want to ask even before we ask them:
- So why DO Mexicans stare? Because you’re a hot guera. Doh!
- Well then why do they eat beans? Because if you know how to cook them properly they are a delicious, nutritious low-cost protein.
POCHO Jefe-in-Chief Lalo Alcaraz reveals what’s in his bag (video)
POCHO Jefe-in-Chief Lalo Alcaraz not only draws and writes stuff but he has admitted to occasional episodes of skanking, and, yes, even moshing. In this video for the Amoeba Music chain, openly-Latino Alcaraz talks about his love for classic ska, vintage mambo and soul music.
Venezuela shit production hits record, outpaces toilet paper supply
The Venezuelan Bolivarian Revolution, now firmly guided by the strong and steady hand of Commandante El Presidente Nicolas Maduro, has achieved new records in the production of shit, or mierda as it is known locally.
But pride in the record April crop of fecal material was tempered by a Western capitalist conspiracy which has left the country short of papel higiénico.
Mas…Venezuela shit production hits record, outpaces toilet paper supply
Talk radio guy blows the lid off ‘Mexican swimming lessons’ (video)
If you’ve been wondering why the internationally-lauded public school system in Mexico makes sure all the kids get swimming lessons, talk show guy AND education expert Rick Rantz of 1270AM WQTT in Union County, OH, has the answer. Advertising Sales Manager Mike Schnell is at 614.935.1038 if you have more questions.The radio station’s Programming Department is at 614.425.9633, or you can email grivers@icsohio.com.
Disney Day of the Dead faux pas: Latinos turned noise into news (audio)
From NPR: When Disney tried to trademark Dia de los Muertos for their new movie merchandise inspired by the Mexican holiday, Latinos picked up their own mice, went online and turned things back around.
For this week’s News or Noise, Latino USA guest host Luis Antonio Perez speaks with POCHO Jefe-in-Chief Lalo Alcaraz and Kety Esquivel, a digital media strategist, about how Latinos online retaliated against the entertainment giant.
Breaking: Congress to probe ‘illegal immigrant sneaker code’
(PNS reporting from WASHINGTON, D.C.) Rep. Randolph Snopes (R-AL) plans committee hearings next week to investigate reports that “illegal immigrants” from Mexico are encoding secret messages in sneakers hanging over telephone wires — messages about how to avoid police, sell drugs and promote terrorism, PNS has learned.
Snopes, chairman of the Unamerican Activities Committee, maintains that evidence of “sneaker-encoded propaganda” has been covered up by “high echelons of the Obama Administration,” according to leaked committee documents circulating on Capitol Hill.
Mas…Breaking: Congress to probe ‘illegal immigrant sneaker code’
Colbert Report: Do Hispanics cost trillion$ and have low IQs? (video)
It takes an ace newsman like Stephen Colbert to get to the bottom of the barrel of reasons why the Heritage Foundation’s report on immigration says legalization will cost us six trillion dollars and the entire Hispanic race has lower IQs than native white Americans.
Breaking: Silicio Barrio startup demos 3D tortilla printer
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(PNS reporting from GUANAJUATO, MX) Previously-secret startup MasaTek.com today unveiled a hardware/software combo that uses 3D printing to print corn or flour tortillas with the religious or brand image of your choice.
“The waiting is over!” Carlos Molinero, president of the Silicio Barrio company, told reporters here. “You need Jesus? He’s just a click away. La Virgen is always on deck!”
The WiFi-enabled printer is the size of a small microwave and has a hopper on top for masa. It uses open source 3D software, Molinero said, and is easily addressable with standard CAD tools.
Mas…Breaking: Silicio Barrio startup demos 3D tortilla printer
Ghost woman walks Bogota street, disappears into thin air (video)
Victor Barona of Bogota, Colombia TV news NTN24.com reporting:
Closed circuit security cameras outside a townhouse complex record a woman walking the street late at night, a woman dressed in clothes from another century. She is plainly visible on camera and then she disappears into thin air. Ma ma ma my llorona.
Mas…Ghost woman walks Bogota street, disappears into thin air (video)