So you remember those cutesy Buick commercials from the past couple of years, the series that featured a chirpy synth soundtrack and beautiful people being surprised that beautiful people drive the General Motors brand and they all say “Is that a Buick” or some phrase of disbelief?
And how you laughed at the commercials, because no way on Earth would strangers or friends really congratulate you for driving a Buick?
“I’m not a baby!” says Teresita predictably but then insists on bringing her large plastic car, a hideous yellow contraption with giant painted eyeballs instead of headlights. Teresita gets in the toy car and looks at Lina expectantly. Lina sighs and begins to push her down the street.
“This is just a stroller, you know.” Lina grumbles. “You’re not making any progress into becoming a real person.”
Teresita either does not hear or pretends not to understand the English sentence. Lina suspects that rather than being a child “confused by the dichotomies of her bilingual upbringing” as the pre-school teacher suggested, that Teresita is just selectively deaf.
Can you count the niños in the Mexican Car?
How much does America love tacos, you ask? Taco imagery is everywhere — jewelry (necklace, above), toys, drinks, desserts, babies, kitties, doggies, purses, rear-view mirrors. And how could we make a listicle without the pink taco? [The pink taco final photograph may be NSFW depending on your work. We don’t think it is, but you never know, tu sabes?]
After the Cuban Communist Revolution, auto sports were banned as elitist, but now they’re back. Hot rods are drag-racing down the streets of Havana — with the blessing of the Party! FUSION reports.
PREVIOUSLY ON CUBA:
Mama Skeletor always told Baby Skeletor that breakfast was the most important meal of the day.
It doesn’t make for better or faster food — or healthier — but accordian music sure makes ordering at the McDonald’s drive-through window more fun!
PREVIOUSLY ON FAST FOOD BURGERS:
In the formerly-Soviet Република Србија (Republic of Serbia), lowrider rides you!
It’s hard to make a living as a Communist car thief in the Republic of Cuba; there aren’t many cars worth stealing. But every once in a while a hard-working Marxist-Leninist scores a sweet European import, like this stylin’ Fiat. And don’t worry about hot-wiring the ignition, either, Comrade. From each according to his ability; to each according to his need.
It’s never a slow ñews day in Rancho Pocho, what with the freezing temperatures, babbling stars on awards shows and fools trying to outrun the police. Take, for example, this baboso who is born to run the streets near Los Angeles International Airport…