Pocho Ocho Top Things To Expect If We Had A Mexican President

Tio Bernie? Uncle Joe? I guess. But call me a dreamer because I’m still holding out hope for a late but successful third-party Mexican American presidential bid. I can already see the first 100 days unfolding….

Mira the Pocho Ocho Top Things To Expect If We Had A Mexican President:

8. Secret Service detail replaced by cousins and their pitbulls.

7. Border wall built around Texas to keep Tex-Mex recipes from emigrating.

6. All veteranos are eligible for VA benefits.

Mas…Pocho Ocho Top Things To Expect If We Had A Mexican President

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Is Cinco de Mayo Fake News?

Yesterday, mijo ask me gwhy peoples celebrate the Cinco de Mayo.

“Is because of the Battle of Puebla,” I tole him.

“Do people in Mexico get borrachos and crazy like they do here in the United States?”

“Crazy? No. The kids get day off from eschool and then some mens dresses up in the pueblo of Puebla and play like is the battle happening again.”

“No crazy borrachos?”

“No, is more like kids eating candy and washing TV.”

“Is it about Mexican people being proud of their culture?”

“No,” I say. “I’m no proud of gringos gwearing sombreros and eating chimichangas.”

“Are chimichangas Mexican?”

“I don know. I never ate one,” I say. “But the gringos love to eat the food with all the cheez I don know what it is.”

Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Is Cinco de Mayo Fake News?

From France: Creamed potatoes, red onions, and cheese ‘tacos’ (video)


Home fries, red onions, cream sauce and Pont-L’Evêque cheese are the stars of this one-minute recipe video for “tacos” from Elle&Vire, a diary conglomerate in France’s Normandy region. But this begs the critical tortilla-based question: Corn or wheat? Also note that they call tortillas “galettes fajitas,” which translates as fajita pancakes. Unclear on the concept, n’est-ce pas? On the other hand, since they want you to heat the assembled dish on a griddle at 400° for five minutes, and then fold it up, it’s actually a potato quesadilla. Or something.

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: That time Mijo made me a ‘Hipster Taco’

Hola. Is Tia Lencha here. Today I going to help you make my new faborite taco. The other day I saw my mijo making sonething in the kishen. I so proud. He like to cook like his mama.

I say, “Mijo, what you making?”

He say, “A taco.”

I see that he was using corn tortillas, crumble Oaxaca cheese, scramble eggs, salsa chipotle, and potato ships. I was confuse.

Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: That time Mijo made me a ‘Hipster Taco’

Breaking Ñews: Did French troops use poison gas in Puebla?

(PNS reporting from MEXICO CITY) French invaders fighting indigenous militias in the state of Puebla are using poison gas, according to situation reports circulating here in the capital.

If the reports can be substantiated, it marks a dangerous escalation in the hostilities, and would mean Napoleon III’s troops have “crossed a red line” set by the Lincoln Administration in Washington.

“Oh simon, it was gas,” said one eyewitness rushed from the front by the cavalry. “French General Pepe Le Pew knows he is losing the la guerra and he is desperate. We think it is the deadly gas de brie, which these queseros love.”

Mas…Breaking Ñews: Did French troops use poison gas in Puebla?

Pocho Ocho Top Facts You Need to Know About New Hampshire

newhampshiredonkeyhoteyDonald Trump’s and Bernie Sanders’ stunning victories Tuesday don’t make sense unless you know the hidden history of the state of New Hampshire.

That’s the reason we researched and compiled the Pocho Ocho Top Facts You Need to Know About New Hampshire:

8. New HAMpshire is known for its “HAM aroma” which inspired the hit song My Sharona

7. Coincidence or conspiracy? The ham-smelling state’s namesake [old] Hampshire, on England’s southern coast across the channel from France, smells like CHEESE

6. New Hampshire is very white. How white is it? New Hampshire is so white it makes the OSCARS look like a #BlackLivesMatter rally

Mas…Pocho Ocho Top Facts You Need to Know About New Hampshire

This is why they hate us: The Hamilton-Beach breakfast burrito maker

hbscreencapMaking a breakfast burrito is hard work, especially in the morning when it’s time to eat breakfast. There’s the delicate cracking of the eggs thang, the slicing of the cheese procedure, the tricky cooking and not burning, and finally the delicate assembly work. All in the morning! Maybe even before the cafecito kicks in! Aye dios mio! What’s a hungry pocho to do?

Chillax, homie, We’ve got your modern gadget right here: The new Breakfast Burrito Maker from Hamilton-Beach, your favorite manufacturer of stupid single-use appliances.

Mas…This is why they hate us: The Hamilton-Beach breakfast burrito maker

No justice, no peas? Eight excellent ways to rock the guac

timesguac

  1. Go for it! Actually try that loco New York Times pea guacamole recipe that has been dividing the nation. Worst case scenario, it’s guácala but you can call your mama and brag to her that you ate an entire vegetable. Maybe she’ll make you some real guacamole as a reward!
  2. Got a fierce sweet tooth? Scandalize everyone by making this dessert guacamole with lots and lots of chocolate!
  3. Impress your Filipino friends by making this sabroso avocado milkshake with condensed milk. (Tell the metiches that ask you what it is that it’s full of nopales!)
  4. Just go ahead and throw everything in your ethnic identity in a bowl with this Chorizo-Queso Fresco-Guacamole!!

    Mas…No justice, no peas? Eight excellent ways to rock the guac

Chef Lindsay: How do you make fried kee-so tacos at El Cortez?

They look scrumptious — especially the cheese that she crisps on the grill at El Cortez — but please, Chef Lindsay Porter, it’s kay-so, not kee-so! To be fair, El Cortez is in Edmonton, Alberta, Canadia, where they call their dollars “Loonies.” PRO TIP: Cortez is NOT a Mexican hero, unless you mean the Nike Cortez.

Mas…Chef Lindsay: How do you make fried kee-so tacos at El Cortez?

Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Mijo makes for me a ‘Hipster Taco’

Hola. Is Tia Lencha here. Today I going to help you make my new faborite taco. The other day I saw my mijo making sonething in the kishen. I so proud. He like to cook like his mama.

I say, “Mijo, what you making?”

He say, “A taco.”

I see that he was using corn tortillas, crumble Oaxaca cheese, scramble eggs, salsa chipotle, and potato ships. I was confuse.

Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Mijo makes for me a ‘Hipster Taco’

Ask A Mexican: Why do Mexicans hate yellow cheese so much? (video)

mexicheeseWhen POCHO’s Associate Naranjero, the esteemed Gustavo ¡Ask A Mexican! Arellano, watched the video of BuzzFeed feeding Taco Bell to actual Mexicans (photo), he knew he needed to set the record straight regarding the yellow cheese that tops lots of Mexican-American food. Because queso, k no? Yellow cheese, says Gus, has an honorable history — and pocho cred. Also, BuzzFeed, FYI: Burritos, white rice and flour tortillas ARE “Mexican food,” doh!

Gus wrote the book, you know. Literally. It’s called TACO USA (How Mexican Food Conquered America).  

And now, prepare your device and your mind will follow.

Why do Mexicans hate yellow cheese so much? (the video)

Mas…Ask A Mexican: Why do Mexicans hate yellow cheese so much? (video)