The notorious drug lord is a whole new vato now — and here are the Pocho Ocho Top Ways You Can Tell El Chapo Has “Gone Hollywood”:
8. He’s dating Kate Hudson
7. He’s on an all-cactus juice cleanse to drop weight for the upcoming pilot season
6. He just reached 200k followers on Instagram
When he makes his presidential run in 2020, Kanye West is not gonna alienate potential Latino voters like Trump, oh no he won’t.
Check out the Pocho Ocho Craziest Things we found in the Rosca de Reyes here at the POCHO world headquarters:
8. Rosca’s Chicken and Waffles
7. One long black hair
6. Hot new Kanye West musical discovery “Paul McCarthy”
Abuelita wants to step up her look with cool-looking shades, so she’s checking out Kanye West style sunglasses, John Lennon specs and heavy black hipster models. Which style is right for her?
PREVIOUSLY ON ABUELITA REVIEWS:
(PNS reporting from FORT WORTH, TX) Leon Ortiz (photo, center) was scrolling through his Facebook newsfeed last week when he saw a post that changed his life forever. The post, co-authored by former President Bill Clinton (photo, left) and pop star Kayne West (photo, right), celebrated the importance of following your dreams.
“You know, I think it was Fate — with a capital ‘F.’ It was 3:42 PM on a Thursday and I was feeling frustrated at my account manager job at an international insurance company. I felt a spiritual lightness I had never experienced before,” the Arlington Heights man told PNS.
“It was amazing, like all my ennui and weltschmerz was gone!”
When an important pop culture artifact like a Kanye West CD (or baby) drops, smart pochas y pochos step back from the frenzy and take a dispassionate look at WTF is going on.
That’s why our MiJA, Elise Roedenbeck, at her new gig down there in Miami with Fusion, embarked on a dramatic reading of the West composition I Am A God, from the album Yeezus. (SAFE FOR WORK. ALL LYRICS HAVE BEEN SANITIZED FOR YOUR PROTECTION.)
Just before Kim Kardashian was rushed to Cedars-Sinai Hospital in West Hollywood to deliver a daughter (with babydaddy Kanye West), she was at Lamaze classes with unwed teenage mom-to-be Rosalinda Guzman. (NSFW language.)