So you remember those cutesy Buick commercials from the past couple of years, the series that featured a chirpy synth soundtrack and beautiful people being surprised that beautiful people drive the General Motors brand and they all say “Is that a Buick” or some phrase of disbelief?
And how you laughed at the commercials, because no way on Earth would strangers or friends really congratulate you for driving a Buick?
I sit at a bar and I count how many are like me, I count two in a room of 30, one is a bar back Latinx and one is an African American bartender, I’ve done this since I realized that I am the other, and I need to find allies quick, in case shit goes down, in case there’s a race war
I order thai food from a food truck and the señor making the food could be my primo, while the Asian owner takes my order
Jose Contreras of Tacos and Trifectas (he likes “the ponies”) stops by Taqueria La Mexicana at 4th and Coronado, Long Beach, Califas, and picks up tres de asada. Spoiler: He likes ’em, he really really really likes ’em!
PREVIOUSLY ON TACOS AND TRIFECTAS:
Abuelita (Altagracia Guzman) knows her chichis (or “titties” as she calls them) and which bras are best – the padded bra or la flimsy, risqué model.
PREVIOUSLY ON ABUELITA REVIEWS:
(PNS reporting from LAS VEGAS) Exciting new tablet/mobile apps and wearable tech were the stars at Friday’s Cholo Electronics Show (CES) here.
Generating the most buzz was the free Chologram™ app from Firme Junior Systems of Oakland. The Instagram wannabe showed off software with patented La Vida Loca Lifestyle image effects, including the one-click application of teardrop tattoos to a facial image. The premium version ($5.99) removes teardrop tattoos from a photo. The application runs on iOS and Android systems, smartphones and tablets. No pinches Windows phones.
Yes, people really write Yelp reviews of border crossings. In this video, one of a series, Marsha Stephanie Blake reads Mona M.’s review of the Chula Vista Border Patrol station in San Diego.
In another border checkpoint Yelp video, Harris Doran reads Eric T.’s Yelp review of the San Ysidro border crossing in San Diego.:
POCHO’s New Jack City Burro Jefe Elise Roedenbeck wraps up this week’s ñews in the premiere installment of Mija Weekly. Please note she is quite insistent that you leave comments below. (NSFW language.)
If you want the bottom line, here it is: I went into the movie with low expectations, but was surprised that it was funny, not racist, and well done.
In the film, Ferrell speaks entirely in Spanish, and I have to give him props for doing so well and not stooping to the level of “look at the funny white guy who can’t speak Spanish” jokes. As a matter fact, the movie was surprisingly devoid of the kinds of jokes where gringos make fun of Mexicans via brownfacing, or doing bad imitations of Mexicans.
Basketball: The undefeated Pocho High Fighting Santos meet the Chupacabras of Don Fernando Valley High for the state hoops semifinals next week in Rancho Cucamonga. Booster Club president Cal Ifas wants to remind fans the vuvuzelas have arrived and you can pick up your order at his auto upholstery shop weekdays and Saturdays. Califas Tuck y Roll is in the Pocho Industrial Park behind the Tapatio plant.
Tourism: The El Rancho Pocho Downtown Historical District has once again garnered a mention in Zagat’s Off the Beaten Path Travel Guide: “A sketchy tattoo parlor, Lupe’s Mistic Yerberia and a car battery recycling joint take you back to an earlier time, a time that wasn’t really all that good, actually, but if that’s what you’re looking for, the El Rancho Pocho Downtown Historical District has it all.”