Ghost of Spanish dude sighted in CDMX, and he is pissed!

(PNS reporting from MEXICO CITY) A reeking appartition dressed in the decaying uniform of a Spanish Conquistador was sighted around Mexico City last week, and boy, was he pissed!

The shrieking ghost was seen haunting the Mexico City site of a 1720 battle where the indigenous Mexica Empire defeated the Spanish.

Area man Pito Perez, who reported the ghost to PNS, said it first he thought the goblin might be La Llorona, or pero his drunk Uncle Abelardo, the mariachi, but no.

Mas…Ghost of Spanish dude sighted in CDMX, and he is pissed!

The REAL problem with Kelly Osbourne’s racist toilet-cleaner remark

kellyo“If you kick every Latino out of this country, then who is going to be cleaning your toilets, Donald Trump?”

Uh. Yikes. Yikes yikes yikes.

By now you’re probably familiar with our latest racist media frenzy centered on remarks Kelly Osbourne made on The View, a response to the incredibly racist Donald Trump.

But she sounded just as racist.

Mas…The REAL problem with Kelly Osbourne’s racist toilet-cleaner remark

WTF Whopper: Mexicans have it your guey – at Burger King (photo,video)

burgerkingmexicanNeed a job? Live near Ephrata, Washington? Burger King has openings for people like you!

Huh? Whopper the fries is going on here? MSN Money reports:

Burger King has apologized after a photo of a billboard at one of its locations went viral.

The photo shows a Burger King billboard in Ephrata, Wash., that reads: “Now hiring. Must be Mexican.” Burger King said the billboard was edited by an angry employee who worked at the location last summer, The Atlanta Journal-Constitution​ reports.

Mas…WTF Whopper: Mexicans have it your guey – at Burger King (photo,video)

Fired undocumented gardener sorry he ‘peed on Romney’s petunias’

Gardener Berto Lopez trims a hedge in Beverly Hills

(PNS reporting from BEVERLY HILLS) Inspired by Mitt Romney’s apology for assaulting a long-haired commie prep school classmate, one of the undocumented gardeners Romney hired and then fired in 1996 has issued his own apology.

Berto Lopez, now working as a freelance arborist in Beverly Hills, regrets he once peed on the then-governor’s prized petunias.

“I did some rude things when I was younger,” he told PNS Thursday, “and if I hurt any of those plants, well then I am truly sorry.”

But Lopez denied the peeing and the firing were related. “I peed on the plants because Romney was a pendejo —  how you say — douchebag:”

Mas…Fired undocumented gardener sorry he ‘peed on Romney’s petunias’

Rush Limbaugh’s Pocho Ocho excuses for being a douchebag

Bloated talk show host and leader of the Republican party Rush Limbaugh has been abusing his broadcast microphone by viciously attacking, well, everyone, but most recently 30-year-old law student Sandra Fluke, calling her a “slut” and a “prostitute.”

He has since issued a weak apology, but his show continues to bleed sponsors and radio stations.

Here are his Pocho Ocho excuses for being a douchebag:

8. Skanks don’t get satire
7. Dennis Miller is my new staff writer
6. I jumped the whale

Mas…Rush Limbaugh’s Pocho Ocho excuses for being a douchebag

Rush Limbaugh, million dollar whore

Bloated drug addict and political hate merchant Rush Limbaugh has been losing advertisers on his hateful radio show since he called 30-year-old Georgetown University law student Sandra Fluke a “slut” and a “prostitute.” She merited this libelous statement apparently because she would dare to stand up for women’s health concerns and also use contraceptives. Yes, birth control.

Mas…Rush Limbaugh, million dollar whore