Casting Call: Latina actress to play Donald Trump’s assistant (photo)

castingAre you an attractive and passionate Latina actress, 21-35, with perfect English and a slight Hispanic accent who wants to deliver scripted monologues talking straight to the camera about your experiences working as an executive assistant for Donald Trump for an Internet video of some sort?

Don’t apply if you’re in the Screen Actors Guild, or want to get paid. You’ll get a copy, your name will be in the credits and you can be a star on social media. Bring your own lube.

Here’s the original casting notice email, via Los Angeles actor Siri Corretjer on Facebook:

Mas…Casting Call: Latina actress to play Donald Trump’s assistant (photo)

Mexican Mitt Romney: DON TROMP ES CON MAN

trumpyoggacroppedHOLA MIS PINCHES!

I had to speak up, because of this human hot cheeto el DONALD TROMP.

The REPUBLICAN PARTY is turning into one of those fiestas that go on past 3 am and ALL YOUR DRONK TIOS FIGHT and the CHOTA comes to arrest everybody. Pero at this fiesta, no one is arresting the one who ESTARTED ALL THE PEDO: DONALD TROMP.

He is the worst thing to happen to the Republican Fiesta since TED CRUZ Y MARCO RUBIO, the CUBAN BLUNDER TWINS!

TROMP is not the man to represent the GOP. GOP now stands for GET OUT PENDEJO!

Mas…Mexican Mitt Romney: DON TROMP ES CON MAN

Mex Ex-Prez Vicente Fox: I have Trump-Induced Tourette’s Syndrome

vicentefoxfinger(PNS reporting from MEXICO CITY) Former Mexican President Vicente Fox announced Monday that he has a rare disorder known as “Trump Induced Tourette’s Syndrome,” or TITS, in which every time he hears the name or sees an image of Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump, he involuntarily screams vulgarities and suffers mild convulsions.

“The condition was originally diagnosed by doctors as just visceral hatred for a bigoted, sexist, fascist, moron,” Fox said this morning at a Mexico City press conference. “But the more his popularity surged and the more I heard the name Trump, the more I cursed that mutha fu¢kn hate-mongering piece of baboon $h!t.”

Mas…Mex Ex-Prez Vicente Fox: I have Trump-Induced Tourette’s Syndrome

Latino USA: Trump is good for business – the piñata business (audio)

trumppinatas“Jennifer De Benito could have had any piñata she wanted for her 14th birthday party. She chose a piñata of Donald Trump. The three-foot-tall piñatas depict Trump in a business suit with his infamous blonde hair and they’re flying off the shelves on both sides of the U.S.–Mexico border,” writes Samantha Clark.

“It all started last summer when Trump said Mexico was “bringing drugs, they’re bringing crime, they’re rapists.”

“Jesús Márquez makes piñatas in Watsonville, a small farming town on the central coast of California. Márquez is from Mexico and says that although Trump’s comments are racist, they have been good for business.”

Maria Hinojosa of NPR’s Latino USA reports:

Mas…Latino USA: Trump is good for business – the piñata business (audio)

Pocho Ocho Top Facts You Need to Know About New Hampshire

newhampshiredonkeyhoteyDonald Trump’s and Bernie Sanders’ stunning victories Tuesday don’t make sense unless you know the hidden history of the state of New Hampshire.

That’s the reason we researched and compiled the Pocho Ocho Top Facts You Need to Know About New Hampshire:

8. New HAMpshire is known for its “HAM aroma” which inspired the hit song My Sharona

7. Coincidence or conspiracy? The ham-smelling state’s namesake [old] Hampshire, on England’s southern coast across the channel from France, smells like CHEESE

6. New Hampshire is very white. How white is it? New Hampshire is so white it makes the OSCARS look like a #BlackLivesMatter rally

Mas…Pocho Ocho Top Facts You Need to Know About New Hampshire