Cultura

It’s Not News to Us

Angry Tejanos demand British Museum return Freddy Fender’s wig

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(PNS reporting from TEXAS) Tejanos want singer Freddy Fender’s wig back.

The Música Committee of the Narciso Martinez Cultural Arts Center in San Benito last week demanded the British Museum effect “the immediate return of this important Tejano cultural item.”

The salt-and-pepper Afro-style toupee, called “Freddy’s Fro,” disappeared from the singer’s home shortly after his death in 2006 and reappeared this winter in the Museum’s “Ethnic Minorities in the United States” exhibit on a mannequin of the singer, best known for his 1970s’ hit Wasted Days and Wasted Nights.

Mas…Angry Tejanos demand British Museum return Freddy Fender’s wig

Pocho ocho most racist things said to Latinas on online dating sites

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It’s tough for hermanas out there trying to find love — especially with the anonymity of the online dating world. What makes it even harder for Latinas online is how easy it can be for dudes to be jerks, specifically, racist jerks.

Here’s our list of the top eight racist things said to Latinas in online dating sites:

8. I’ll be your anchor baby.

7. Chupa mi cabra.

6. Our future children won’t speak Spanish, like real Americans.

Mas…Pocho ocho most racist things said to Latinas on online dating sites

Latina discovers talent for poetry by saying random words slowly

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(PNS reporting from SAN FRANCISCO)  Marce “More-Say” Figueroa discovered her talent for poetry this time last year when her roommate told her she was talking in her sleep.

After that conversation, Figueroa started writing down the random words that popped into her head when she woke up. Soon, she realized what she was really writing was poetry — and April is National Poetry Month!

“Angie my roommate was all, like, ‘Wow Marce, that’s great,’” she told PNS. “She was so inspired that I started writing more poems, and after a reading in the City College of San Francisco cafeteria, I changed my name to More-Say, instead of Marce, because it’s like poetry, you know?”

Mas…Latina discovers talent for poetry by saying random words slowly

Scanning for Mexicans? How about puro pocho ringtones! (audio)

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Our amigos at Latino Rebels tipped us off to a brewing controversy about a South Park audio clip being used as a ringtone. On South Park they were “scanning for Mexicans.”

We decided cellphones needed some puro pocho ringtones, so we made four ringtones — dare we call them POCHOTONES? — starring Cheech Marin, Edward J. Olmos, Alfonso Bedoya and George Lopez.

Download and share (.mp3 format):

Mas…Scanning for Mexicans? How about puro pocho ringtones! (audio)

PNS*Hot*Flash: Mexican porn star feted in DF

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(PNS reporting from MEXICO CITY) Famed Mexican porn star Alejandro Montejainas was honored at a gala reception in Mexico City’s Zona Rosa last week.

Montejainas, who first gained public notoriety in his landmark 1967 film Chilito Lindo, has starred in more than 70 productions in a career that spans nearly four decades.

Perhaps best known for his political porn film El Sex-enio, Montejainas was a staunch advocate of sexual liberation in Mexico. In 1977 he founded a production studio, Buscochurro, which helped transform the Mexican sexual landscape with such films as Espaldas Mojadas, Buki Nights, Señor Treviño, Dong Juan, Santo vs. Blue Bolas, Shower of Gold and the 10-part series Ynez Sin Barreras.

Joining Montejainas at the head table were fellow industry heavyweights Rudy Alegre, Johnny Listo and Amber Tamalera. One of the highlights of the evening was the arrival of a telegram from former Mexican Pres. Carlos Salinas de Gortari which referred to Montejainas as “a friend to the Mexican home video industry.” The telegram was later read aloud to the audience.

Mas…PNS*Hot*Flash: Mexican porn star feted in DF

Hey, honky! The origin of the world’s most heinous racial slur

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POCHO Jefe-in-Chief Lalo Alcaraz‘s recent article about the word gringo ignited a shitstorm of debate. White people came out of the woodwork to declare how they’ve been traumatized all these years because of it.

This got me thinking about racial slurs and how we use them in these oh-so-modern times. Rand Paul used the term chili-choking pepper bellies the other day when he was talking about immigration reform. What’s the gringo equivalent of a chili-choking pepper belly? Twinky-gagging sugar gut? Sounds stupid, right?

“You cornbread-gobbling butter stomach!”

Mas…Hey, honky! The origin of the world’s most heinous racial slur

Mi corazón esta con mi gente, my heart is with my people

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My heart is with my people as I await my procedure.

I await my procedure, Mi Gente. I await it this overcast Sunday morning, surrounded by the bells of the Churches, by my Angels, and the people whom I love. Yeah, I ended up in the hospital the other night. Which one….does not matter. I know people here, Mi Gente is here, and I make friends kinda easy, too.

I just got the word about a lady, who comes into the area, every Saturday, to sell her homemade tamalitos. I know where she will be next Saturday, she and her esposo. And I plan to be there, too.

I am going to get my tamalito de rajas, my fave. Maybe I’ll carry the travel coffee deal my sister gave us. Too cool for school. And I’ll bring my “whatta chair” and hang out in the area, under the beautiful trees, and see mis amigos e amigas.

Mas…Mi corazón esta con mi gente, my heart is with my people

Pocha Podcast #2: Sexism, feminism, football and IT (NSFW audio)

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Pochas Elise Roedenbeck and me, Sara Inés Calderón, have a grand old time talking about sexism and feminism. Isn’t it interesting that, even though the U.S. had a “feminist movement,” we have never elected a woman president, and the wage gap between men and women in Latin America is smaller than it is here?

And other sexist stuff: What about football, how sexist is that, ey? And IT? Being a woman in the U.S. may seem like fun and games, given that whole reproductive rights discussion, but there are some downsides.

Mas…Pocha Podcast #2: Sexism, feminism, football and IT (NSFW audio)

Don’t mess w/ Texas! ‘ThumbSnatchers from the Moon Cocoon’ (video)

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Guns don’t kill people, opposable thumbs that pull triggers on guns kill people. And that’s why our Alien Overlords have returned to end our evil ways — by ending our evil thumbs. But the invading Thumb Snatchers from the Moon Cocoon (stupid lunar Daleks with green blood) didn’t reckon on Texas Sheriff Huckiss. The law in Texas doesn’t give much slack to illegal aliens.

Hey, Mr. Anti-Immigration Man, can we see your grandpa’s papers?

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Bend the Arc, a Jewish social justice organization, just introduced an online legal widget that applies immigration laws to your family’s history. Answer some questions and the Entry Denied widget determines if your immigrant ancestors would be allowed into the U.S. today.

And guess what:

Millions of Americans have grown up with a defining family immigration story. But while our families may have endured hardship coming to America, the simple fact is that most of our immigration stories would not be possible at all under today’s immigration laws.

Mas…Hey, Mr. Anti-Immigration Man, can we see your grandpa’s papers?

Pocha Podcast: WTF is up with these catcalls? (NSFW audio)

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POCHO’s Subcommandanta del Ñews Sara Inés Calderón in Los Angeles and New Jack City Burro Jefe Elise Roedenbeck got together in audioland to see if they could figure out WTF is up with guys and their weird catcalls and come-ons. Is it different in New York vs. L.A.? Are Spanish catcalls different from English? What’s a guera to do?

Ooops! This audio file seems to be missing! The authorities have been notified.

Hooray! We found a cached copy on Archive.org. Download the POCHA PODCAST here (5.1MB MP3)

RIP: POCHO remembers our film critic, Cisco Yberra

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As many of you may have read, POCHO’s beloved film critic, Cisco Yberra, passed away last week.  We’ll miss him so much, and so will you when you check out some of the cinematic gems he brought to our attention when he was not dead:

Sandra Ramos O’Briant – ‘Chile Tales: The Green Addiction’

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Philosophers have often looked for the defining feature of humans — language, rationality, culture and so on. I’d stick with this: Man is the only animal that likes Tabasco sauce.

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In Texas, when my parents were still married, we ate fried chicken, mashed potatoes laden with cream gravy, green beans flavored with bits of bacon and buttery light biscuits. Every item on the menu had its own serving dish, and cloth napkins were always used.

“May I have another biscuit, ma’am?” I would say.

“You surely may, Sandra Mae,” my daddy’s mama would reply and everyone would smile. Or we’d have fried pork chops and suck on the salty bones, but only when it was just my mama and me at the dinner table.

In Texas, there were black-eyed peas and ham and all manner of greens and put-up preserves. There was watermelon and homemade ice cream from the hand-crank ice-cream maker. Daddy held a bourbon and water in one hand, and turned the handle with the other, while Mama and my daddy’s mama drank iced tea on the back porch and exchanged polite insults. My grandma didn’t like it that Daddy had married a Mexican.

Mas…Sandra Ramos O’Briant – ‘Chile Tales: The Green Addiction’

Pocho Ocho signs that you are a renter

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Here at POCHO headquarters, not all of us own our own homes. As a matter of fact, some of us are the victims of less-than-concerned landlords. Oh, the joys of renting!

Here are the Pocho ocho signs that you’re renting:

8. Your towel rack is broken for weeks at a time and you have to hang your towel on the front stoop, which “brings down property values” but doesn’t lower your rent.

7. You can hear cats having sex on every side of your apartment complex in the middle of the night.

6. Toilets, showers and sinks occasionally overflow with water that smells funny.

Mas…Pocho Ocho signs that you are a renter

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