Pocho Ocho things Donald Trump wants you to know about Mexicans
Because he wants to make America great again, GOP presidential nominee wannabe Donald Trump shared some nasty knowledge about Mexican immigrants when he announced his candidacy Tuesday (video).
They’re rapists, he said, and bring crime and drugs.
But that’s not all! Here are are Pocho Ocho top things Donald Trump also wants you to know about Mexicans:
8. If you rub a Mexican’s tummy just the right way, they’ll wiggle they brown little arms and legs and say “Squee squee squee” but in Mexican of course.
7. Mexican show business is infested with thesbians.
6. Mexicans are so crazy lazy they will take your job.
Mas…Pocho Ocho things Donald Trump wants you to know about Mexicans
Watch: Mariachi El Bronx is burning up with ‘Wildfires’ (official video)
Burning with love like Wildfires, alt.neo.electro.fusion.cumbia.mariachi conjunto Mariachi El Bronx continues the quest for a hit record in 6/8 time with this new official music video:
Mas…Watch: Mariachi El Bronx is burning up with ‘Wildfires’ (official video)
@AlMadrigal reports: Campaign 2016 begins in Iowa (video)
As the 2016 presidential election campaign starts up, all eyes turn to Iowa, traditionally the first place Americans get a chance to vote for their candidates. Jon Stewart and The Daily Show sent POCHO Migrant Editor Al Madrigal to the Hawkeye State to find out why exactly Iowa rates this singular honor.
Mas…@AlMadrigal reports: Campaign 2016 begins in Iowa (video)
From LatinoUSA: The unlikely story of Chicano Batman (audio, video)
Southern California pochos Chicano Batman started out in the hood, lucked out with a spot at Coachella and then went on the road opening for Jack White. They shared their story with LatinoUSA.
The band’s latest video is Cycles of Existential Rhyme:
Mas…From LatinoUSA: The unlikely story of Chicano Batman (audio, video)
D.A.R.E.’s Daren the Lion mascot quits, moves to Colorado
(PNS reporting from MILWAUKEE) Local cat made good Daren the Lion, long-time spokescritter for the D.A.R.E. anti-drug education program, has resigned and moved to Colorado, PNS learned Monday.
“He’s fallen off the catnip wagon,” one area family member told PNS. “He’s all about the ‘flowers’ now.”
Mas…D.A.R.E.’s Daren the Lion mascot quits, moves to Colorado
In the Event of a Time Warp (Again), Keep Calm and Habla Spanglish
In the unlikely event of a Time Warp (again), Keep Calm and Habla Spanish. Available now at ThePochoStore on CafePress.
And now, Let’s Do the Time Warp Again — en Español:
Mas…In the Event of a Time Warp (Again), Keep Calm and Habla Spanglish
Tia Lencha’s Cocina: On Father’s Day I think about my ex’s chorizo
Hola. Is Tia Lencha here.
After many jears of being divorce from mijo’s daddy, (that’s a photo of him leaving I took for the lawyer), I share with ju the recipe I make for the Father’s Day, which is on Sunday. When I think of mijo’s daddy, I think of chorizo.
Oso, when I see a good looking chorizo at the store, I think of mijo’s daddy. Get jur mind out of the trash can, cochinos. Is because mijo’s daddy make really good chorizo!
Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: On Father’s Day I think about my ex’s chorizo
Watch: Competitive eater Nela Zisser eats 5-pound burrito in 5 minutes
Nela Zisser, competitive eater, model, and Miss Earth New Zealand 2013, turns her deep throat up to 11 as she finishes a five-pound burrito in five minutes, topping MEGATOADS’ two-pound burritozilla record.
Gustavo Arellano to UC Riverside grads: ‘You are secular saints’
Saturday morning, I had the honor of giving the commencement speech at UC Riverside’s College of Arts, Humanities, and Social Sciences for their Sociology, Philosophy, Neuroscience, and Psychology students (what a mouthful!).
Following are my prepared remarks, which I mostly hewed to. I did begin my speech with an explanation of what ustedes and y’all meant, and the pocos pero locos line was improvised and laughed at by about three people.
Anyhoo, enjoy!
Let’s start with an experiment, shall we?
I want all the psychology majors to stand up? Applaud them, por favor, for getting to this special day.
Mas…Gustavo Arellano to UC Riverside grads: ‘You are secular saints’
eBay bidding has begun! @LaloAlcaraz’ AZTEC SK8R UPDATED*
I started this painting last week as part of a series of Mexicas (Aztecs) living and reacting to today’s world.
I was reminded of on-again, off-again modern-day Mexicas by a hate letter/post I got from the organizer and head poobah of a brown “self-hate” group, the Mexica Movement.
These geniuses are the Chicano equivalent of the kooky Westboro Baptist Church, except that instead of attacking everyone for living alongside gays, they attack their own community of Raza for such crimes as drawing a nationally-syndicated comic strip, or daring to perform Aztec Dance.
Mas…eBay bidding has begun! @LaloAlcaraz’ AZTEC SK8R UPDATED*
Abuela with iPad terrorizes area family via Facebook
(PNS reporting from CHICAGO) Rigoberto “Rigo” Chavez, 15, cringed in horror when he logged into Facebook Thursday morning and received a notification that his abuelita had once again commented on his status.
The high school junior had posted a status that read “$waaaag$” and Abuelita replied in ALL CAPS:
CACHORRITO ERES LA LUZ DE MI VIDA. CUIDATE MUCHO TE QUIERO
Mexican insects sing and play ‘La Bamba’ (video)
This La Bamba is a cool song! Amazing we never heard it before!
In Oz, ‘Mexican feast hamper’ means happy employees (video)
We think this short commercial from the Land Down Under urges companies to improve employee morale by giving homesick painters named Mike either a “Mexican Face Tamper” or a “Mexican feast hamper.” We just don’t speak Australian.
PREVIOUSLY ON MEXICAN AUSTRALIAN:
Mas…In Oz, ‘Mexican feast hamper’ means happy employees (video)
Californian @AlMadrigal is all about the H20 on Jon Stewart (video)
POCHO’s Migrant Editor Al Madrigal – who lives in Los Angeles – had to make lifestyle changes because of the California water shortage. In New York, where there’s more than enough H20 to go around, Al can let it all hang out, as he explained to Jon Stewart on The Daily Show.
PREVIOUSLY ON CALIFORNIA DROUGHT:
Mas…Californian @AlMadrigal is all about the H20 on Jon Stewart (video)
#TBT Throwback Thursday Video: Frida Kahlo: The lost home movies
Check out this chingon montage of short clips of Frida Kahlo. The footage shows Kahlo working in her studio, talking with her husband Diego Rivera and posing with her lover Leon Trotsky.
Mas…#TBT Throwback Thursday Video: Frida Kahlo: The lost home movies
Guadalajara kids dance with swastikas. No prob, OK? (video)
What exactly is going on here? Sure, the swastika is/was an ancient symbol of good luck that has been tarnished by the slaughter of untold millions, but wassup with the Nazi-rally-sounding soundtrack? And the flags? And the stormtrooper choreography? The uploader says this video is from May 31 in Guadalajara, Mexico. It doesn’t seem very indigenous folkloristic to us. It’s more like Springtime for Hitler in Mexico.
Mas…Guadalajara kids dance with swastikas. No prob, OK? (video)
Coming Soon: Attack of the 14-Year-Old Black Girl!
Coming soon from McKinney, Texas Police Productions, it’s the next summer horror science fiction cop flick, Attack of the 14-Year-Old Black Girl!
A frightening teen girl in a bikini terrorizes the police force of a small Texas suburb, making them respond with excessive force and brutality reserved only for the worst of America’s swimming thugs!
Who will protect our nation’s pool parties from this monster? Rated R for Racist!
Featuring Emma Stone as the Asian Neighbor.
Food blogger La Quirky discovers the joys of Mexican mangos (video)
La Quirky Nancy discovers mangos in East LA and lives to tell about it. #laQuirky #Columbusing
PREVIOUSLY ON DISCOVERING MEXICAN MANGOS:
Quirky food video blogger katie q discovered this totally delicious new healthy food treat LOL OMG. Latino-style people eat this all the time, I’m so sure! It’s a fruit they call a “mango” and they squeeze lime juice on it and add hot sauce, just like you put mousse on your hair when you go out clubbing. Srsly, is this quirky or what?
Mas…Food blogger La Quirky discovers the joys of Mexican mangos (video)
Pop-up restaurant serves ‘East Coast’ elotes, sopes y churros (video)
Then there was the time chef Jonathan Pimental popped up a restaurant on the roof of an LA building and served “East Coast” elotes, designer sopes and elegant churros.
Mas…Pop-up restaurant serves ‘East Coast’ elotes, sopes y churros (video)
The @LaloAlcaraz AZTEC SK8R auction is less than 24 hours away
POCHO is auctioning off my AZTEC SK8R painting starting Wednesday night, June 10, at 7PM PDT. Check back here tomorrow for the details and the link that could make this painting your own!
I’m all about AZTEC SK8R ON MY INSTAGRAM.
Hey Vato! Chuy needs to go but Angie is all ‘Chola Selfie’ (video)
It’s time for old girlfriends, secret tears and family dynamics in the latest episode of Hey Vato!
When Chuy’s sister Angie hogs the bathroom taking selfies, Smiley interrupts the subsequent sibling discussion with insight from author, artist and poet e.e. cummings.
Mas…Hey Vato! Chuy needs to go but Angie is all ‘Chola Selfie’ (video)
Pet or piñata? What’s to become of ‘Hola Llamigo?’ (video)
When you’re the son of a ranchero, you are supposed to accept that livestock are not pets, and someday they’ll end up as a human’s dinner … or worse.
Mas…Pet or piñata? What’s to become of ‘Hola Llamigo?’ (video)
Demons attack Christian pastor during Nicaragua exorcism (video)
Set your Magic Holy Water Squeeze & Spray Plastic Atomizer on Maximum Ojo as a “Christian Pastor Is Attacked By Evil Spirit On Camera,” according to the LiveLeak uploader:
MANAGUA, NICARAGUA (Central America) 6 dolls made from cloth and drenched in unknown blood were left on the frontyard of a house, the residents claim that now the house is inundated with evil spirts [sic].
Mas…Demons attack Christian pastor during Nicaragua exorcism (video)
