WHITEHOUSE.GOV (No real name given) writes:
Mas…When skeets are outlawed, only outlaws will have skeets (photo)
Marvel Comics’ Captain American celebrates the African-Americans who helped make the U.S. what is today. This panel is from Truth: Red, White and Black, written by Robert Morales and drawn by Kyle Baker. Can you ID everyone in the “photos” on the wall? [Click on the image for a bigger version.]
These shorties are ready to fight — banda style!
Related:
I wrote a uke song called “White Men Are Good” and sang it at a comedy club about 4 years ago. I could feel the audience tense up. Why? Why is there a Black History Month but not a White History Month? Now, that the white race is becoming a minority in America, perhaps we need to make…say, January, White History Month.
The New York Times says, “White births are no longer a majority in the United States.”
I’m just really tired of the white male, and especially the white conservative, Christian male being attacked in cartoons, movies, TV shows, politics, Affirmative Action, etc. It’s like in order to fix the “discrimination” problem, culture flipped the racism from “against blacks” to “against whites”. Why do we have to be “against” anyone? Aren’t we all equal?
Mas…Victoria Jackson: What we need is a ‘White History Month’
Will a Republican shift on immigration help them with Hispanic voters? The Daily Show’s Senior Latino Correspondent Al Madrigal is in Jon Stewart’s His Panic Room as they explore the GOP’s Nuevo Deal. Jessica Williams sneaks in to assist. DISCLOSURE: Madrigal is also POCHO’s Migrant Editor.
GOP leaders are undergoing sensitivity training as they re-evaluate immigration reform. Too often, insiders say, Republicans’ choice of words has hidden their true love for Latinos.
“Tone and rhetoric will be key,” is the message from Jennifer Korn, executive director of the Hispanic Leadership Network. Sen. Marco Rubio (R-FLA), who chairs the GOP’s Vendido Caucus, champions “a kinder, gentler racism.”
Top Republicans will receive a list of phrases that should never, ever be used when discussing immigration reform. Here are the pocho ocho things NEVER to say:
8. Git’ back in your beaner-mobile!
7. Speak inglish you ‘ignant brownie.
6. We ain’t need no anchor babies.
Mas…From the ‘new’ GOP: Pocho Ocho things we shouldn’t say to Latinos
Terry Morales is a hard-working dad and doesn’t spend as much time with his family as he should. Stay-at-home spouse Kerry Morales feels alone, under-appreciated and overwhelmed. And 12-year-old adopted son Tyrollo Morales is “acting out.” Time to call Rescue Nanny 911! (NSFW.)
Mas…This week on ‘Rescue Nanny 911’: The naughty adopted child (video)
Subcommandanta del Ñews Sara Inés Calderón has a one-minute Spanish lesson for you pochos. She’s on Twitter as @SaraChicaD.
Defying the horizontally-correct nay-sayers of videoville, POCHO Jefe-in-Chief Lalo Alcaraz took his iPhone where no phone has gone before — up close and pinche personal with a bowl of menudo at famed Mi Tierra Cafe in San Antonio, TX for a verboten vertical video. Is this the medical menudo we’ve been hearing about?
It’s more than just a minor irritation for the folks at work when the Internet’s Out. (NSFW language.)
I went to San Antonio, Tejas, got some posing tips from the Mexican Elvis and these photos, too. Note: I am the vato without the cape.
Mas…I went to San Antonio and met the Mexican Elvis (photos)
We know some of you are morons or racists or both. Different strokes, meng, different strokes. It’s cool. Here’s a transcript of the speech on immigration that Bronco Bama just delivered in Las Vegas, translated into easy-to-understand Moron. Just for you!
(APPLAUSE)
Dank you. It is good t’ be back in Las Begas.
And it is good t’ be among so many good friends. Let – let me start off by dankigg ebehybody at Del Sol High School f’ hostigg us.
(APPLAUSE)
Go Dragons. Let me especial dank your outstandigg principal, Lisa Primos (ph).
(APPLAUSE)
Dehe are all kinds of notaggle guests hehe, uh uh uh, but I dgust want t’ minion a few. Firss of all, our outstandigg secret of de Departmin of Homeland Security, Dganet Napolitano, is hehe.
Mas…Heya morons! Click HERE for Obama immigration speech transcript
(PNS reporting from WASHINGTON, D.C.) It took a lot of burning sage, cedar, sweetgrass and tobacco, but Tymangoua, the first Native American murdered by a gun in what is now the United States, delivered a message from the spirit world to Washington:
Getting shot and killed sucks!
Indigenous Peoples Against Gun Violence (IPAG) introduced Tymangoua to a press conference here Monday.
IPAG president Lauren Ko’n-Za explained:
Gun violence is not a recent phenomenon. It has existed for hundreds of years and indigenous people like Taymangoua were the first victims. Tymangoua was murdered on Sept. 14, 1513, by Spanish sailors looking to enslave him on the shores of Biscayne Bay in what is now Miami.
Before Al Madrigal got rich and famous as POCHO’s Migrant Editor (and Senior Latino Correspondent for The Daily Show) he spent time on the road as a stand-up comedian, always trying to become a better Mexican. Here he is in 2010, as seen in 3 Non Juans. (NSFW language.)
(PNS reporting from DIXIE) In a groundbreaking study just released by Atlanta’s Center for Brain Development Place, scientists have found that the more racist an individual is the less likely he or she is to comprehend satire.
In the controversial study, published in Totally Not Made Up Magazine last week, participants were asked to read an article titled “Monkey escapes from zoo, spreads poop and socialism” and then asked to comment.
Scientists found that those who believed the monkey should be taught to uphold democracy and abstain from sex before marriage but without the use of taxpayer money were 10 times more likely to be racists.
In the second installment of Mija Weekly ñews wrap I discuss lip-synching, immigration, my chusma hair dresser and I answer questions from you pochos. Also I don’t drop the F-bomb.
Thank you to everyone who watched last week! Don’t forget to leave me your comments below.
Is that a green card in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
Prince Harry’s CNN interview about combat in Afghanistan is just gonna have to wait. One does not simply ignore the amplified call of the tamalero oaxaceño!
(PNS reporting from ARIZONA) The 10-year-old at Frank Elementary School in Guadalupe who got arrested Tuesday learned a valuable lesson about Sheriff Joe Arpaio and celebrity deputy Steven Seagal:
According to the sheriff’s office, the boy had planned to beat one of his classmates at the Maricopa County school with a Wiffle Ball® bat but ended up on the wrong end of Steven Seagal’s sealskin boots instead.
Maricopa County Sheriff’s Office detectives were called to the elementary school by officials who were learned of the plot and found the student in possession of a tattered Wiffle Ball® bat.
Mas…Arpaio busts dangerous 10-year-old (with Steven Seagal’s help)
At 7:35 AM all Marta wanted was her regular coffee and pastry at the local cafe. But this morning was different.
From Pres. Barack Obama’s Second Inaugural Address: “Your baby cousin likes me because I’m more normal and have a smooshy finger? No!”
He lives in a piña under the sea — Bob Esponja — and this is his cancion.
The lyrics:
Mas…Who lives in a piña under the sea? ‘Bob Esponja!’ (video)
(PNS reporting from COMPTON) Minority gun owners tired of the “racist white agenda” of the National Rifle Association have launched the National Gun Association (NGA) to lobby for the rights of Latino and African-American gun owners.
NGA, straight out of the Los Angeles suburb of Compton, believes the NRA’s defense of mass shootings, which are mostly perpetrated by white male Christians, harms the real agenda of supporting gun ownership for personal and business self defense.
NGA president Cole Fotyfife, just back from President Bronco Bama’s inauguration (photo), said the campaign will focus on the message “Guns don’t kill people, crazy white people kill people.”
Mas…Minority gun owners start NGA group to challenge NRA supremacy
Felicidades to new mom Shakira! No more McDonald’s drive-thru window for you! (Video by Roberta Valderrama.)
MORE ROBERTA VALDERRAMA:
He’s what we might call a snake oil salesman. El Vendedor de Humo — the smoke seller — is a master of wish fulfillment and deception. Why did he really come to town? Abuela is skeptical at first, but then…
(PNS reporting from NEW YORK CITY) HBO’s mega hit Girls is getting a spin-off — a Latina version called Chicas.
“We woke up and smelled the cafecito,” producer Elizabeth Ferris told a press conference here this morning, “and the pan dulce.”
“The success of Girls is indisputable and we want to be able to bring that success to the Latino community,” Ferris said. “I don’t know if any Latinos actually watch Girls, but everyone is into the ‘Latino thing’ these days, so why not Chicas?”
The Daily Show’s Al Madrigal was in Washington, D.C. for Bronco Bama‘s second inauguration Monday and tells Jon Stewart about Obama’s new look for America. DISCLAIMER: Madrigal is POCHO’s Migrant Editor.
Everything you need to know about Mexico in 72 seconds, courtesy of filmmaker Chui Galvan of Morelia, D.F., MX. Cliché, you say?
POCHO’s New Jack City Burro Jefe Elise Roedenbeck wraps up this week’s ñews in the premiere installment of Mija Weekly. Please note she is quite insistent that you leave comments below. (NSFW language.)