Feliz Cuatro de Julio! Love for Every Juan!

rainbowflagnail

Sostenemos como evidentes por sí mismas dichas verdades: que todos los hombres son creados iguales; que son dotados por su Creador de ciertos derechos inalienables; que entre estos están la vida, la libertad y la búsqueda de la felicidad. We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.

 

No union is more profound than marriage, for it embodies the highest ideals of love, fidelity, devotion, sacrifice, and family. In forming a marital union, two people become something greater than once they were. As some of the petitioners in these cases demonstrate, marriage embodies a love that may endure even past death. It would misunderstand these men and women to say they disrespect the idea of marriage. Their plea is that they do respect it, respect it so deeply that they seek to find its fulfillment for themselves. Their hope is not to be condemned to live in loneliness, excluded from one of civilization’s oldest institutions. They ask for equal dignity in the eyes of the law. The Constitution grants them that right.
IT IS SO ORDERED.

Justice William Kennedy, Obergefell vs. Hodges

 

Nail art by Sara Inés Calderón.

Texas Senator Ted Cruz’ Pocho Ocho top legislative proposals

tedcruzdonkeyhoteySenator Ted Cruz (R-Texas) has reintroduced legislation to take away federal benefits from same-sex married couples. But this troglodyte’s penedjitis is too advanced to stop at one stupid and hateful idea.

That’s right, there’s more — Ted Cruz’s Pocho Ocho Top Legislative Priorities for 2015:

8. Federal guidelines on subsidized school lunches for poor children shall encourage incorporation of nutritious roadkill meat, especially racoon. Now yer ‘coon is a touch on the greasy side, not sweet like ‘possum, but if you cook ’em up right, mmmmmmm, racoon!

7. Women banned from buying condoms because it curtails a Man’s Right to Reproduce.

6. Solar energy outlawed because it sucks the light right out of the Sun.

Mas…Texas Senator Ted Cruz’ Pocho Ocho top legislative proposals

Online surge of Constitutional Law, Bible experts slows the Internets

(PNS reporting from SILICON VALLEY) The Internets slowed to a virtual crawl yesterday as millions of experts in Constitutional Law and The Holy Bible took to Twitter and Facebook to educate ignorant netizens about the God-hating freedom-attacking Supreme Court ruling on same-sex marriage.

“It was definitely a brownout, dude,” according to 18-year-old Jaime “Twitchy” Loftwich, who runs the worldwide computer network from the basement of his mom’s home in Palo Alto. “Hella load,” he emailed PNS. “I haven’t seen ping times like that since Kim Kardashian was rushed to Cedars-Sinai!”

Mas…Online surge of Constitutional Law, Bible experts slows the Internets

I’m not that all that into marriage, but I support marriage equality

I was at a party the other night when a group of women asked me how long I’ve been with my boyfriend. Oh boy.

I told them six years and braced myself for the onslaught of “WHY AREN’T YOU MARRIED! HE NEEDS TO GIVE YOU A RING! BLABLABLABLA” and so on and so forth.

As a woman who consciously chooses not to get married, I’m constantly dealing with this sort of thing. People just don’t understand why.

Is my boyfriend a commitment-phobe? Are we swingers? Are we not serious? Never are we thought of as a happy stable couple content to just enjoy each other’s company.

No, something must be wrong with us.

Mas…I’m not that all that into marriage, but I support marriage equality

Ñewsweek: Ostriches attack, burritos offend and chickens go gay

It was an ordinary day in an ordinary Mexican convenience store and recorded in grainy black and white by an ordinary surveillance video camera. And then the masked luchador entered – with a posse of ostriches.

This POCHO ñewsweek featured the Florida burritos with offensive names, chicken culture war hawk Col. Sanders’s statement on gay marriage and a chance for you to join Jefe-in-Chief Lalo Alcaraz’s personal campaign to help the survivors of the Anaheim police department’s trigger-happy cops. Here are the links:

Mas…Ñewsweek: Ostriches attack, burritos offend and chickens go gay

Sen. Marco Rubio (R-FLA) proposes new DREAMY Act

(PNS reporting from LA FLORIDA) In an attempt to capitalize on the political gains made by Pres. Barack Obama’s support for gay marriage, Florida GOP senator and possible presidential candidate Marco Rubio has revamped his unpopular DREAM Act alternative.

The original federal DREAM Act allowed undocumented youth brought here as minors a path to citizenship if they served in the military or attended college. Rubio’s DREAM Act “lite” version offered these youth only a non-immigrant visa and permanent status as second-class citizens.

Now, hoping to suck off gay votes from Obama, Rubio has introduced the DREAMY Act.

Mas…Sen. Marco Rubio (R-FLA) proposes new DREAMY Act

Opinion: We must fight the anti-Mayan Calendar Illuminati 1% (video)

We might not know anything about them, but Anonymous knows almost everything about us, including stuff THE MAN doesn’t want YOU to know.

The modishly-masked online crusaders will soon shock our chakras with the truth about apocalyptic confluences predicted by the Mayan Calendar and aether-entities from outer espace. Predictably, the Mainstream Media New World Order 1% Wall Street Ivy League Illuminati White Elite is fighting back.

The recent Anonymous blipvert above, for example, was followed by UPenn (founded by life on Mars expert and immigrant hater Benjamin Franklin) joining the Illuminati conspiracy to discredit the Mayan Apocalypse Doomsday 2012 scenario.

One group of chronology-challenged eschatologists even claimed that a recently-discovered calendar — which is older than the Doomsday Calendar — somehow makes the newer calendar wrong. Doh! Illogical!

Mas…Opinion: We must fight the anti-Mayan Calendar Illuminati 1% (video)

Ñewsweek: Chanclas, foreskins, gay political football, meaning of life

“If the chancla flies, your mom is wise,” noted defense attorney Juan E. Cocran told the court, and we’ve got video to prove it.

The epic flying chanclas video topped the list of big estories on POCHO this week, but only just squeezed out the Mexclusive guest editorial by GOP nominee wannabe Mexican Mitt Romney, the latest chapter in the existential quest of Chuy and Smiley in Hey Vato! and very intimate advice from Dear Abuelita.

Here are the links:

Mas…Ñewsweek: Chanclas, foreskins, gay political football, meaning of life

Mexican Mitt Romney: Obama is spiking the gay football

AJUA!! I am Mexican Mitt Romney, and I am here to clear the record on the GAY MARRIAGE.

Contrary to reports by ABC News and Perez Hilton about Barack Obama being the first president to approve of same-sex marriage, I invented it, and now Barack Obama is hogging all the credit! If you ask me, Obama is spiking the gay football! That is wrong! Everyone knows gays play tennis and hacky sack.

Now the gays are all running around and shrieking like the end of an episode of Ru Paul’s Drag Race just because the PINCHE North Carolina DOUBLE NEGATIVE GAY MARRIAGE Proposition that won this week. HIJOLE! Such drama queens!

In North Carolina it just means that Jethro cannot marry Jethro, but he can marry HIS COUSIN ELLIE MAE! Ajua! That’s what I call FREEDOM!

Mas…Mexican Mitt Romney: Obama is spiking the gay football

Clean sweep: Santorum not pooped out yet

(PNS reporting from THE HEARTLAND) Republican presidential candidate Rick Santorum swept the nominating contests in Missouri, Minnesota and Colorado Tuesday night, claiming, “My campaign is far from pooped out.”

The fiercest gay-baiting candidate in recent history, Santorum now has four victories under his belt in the GOP race, more than any other closeted candidate. “People were saying all along I had Big Mo, but they meant I was a big ‘mo.”

Mas…Clean sweep: Santorum not pooped out yet