mexico

Ñewsweek: Gasbacks swarm MX, corporate cartoon capers caca

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Gas is hella cheap in Mexico and gabachos with gas-guzzlers are going gaga South of the Border filling their gaping petrol holes. Here in Los United Estates, politically-aware cartoons (like Doonesbury) are getting censored.

This cartoon caca is old news to us: Last year, a cartoon by POCHO Jefe-in-Chief Lalo Alcaraz was deemed racist by Huffington Post corporate bigwigs and got the editor of Brentwood.Patch.com fired. Turns out the editor is someone we know and love…

Based on actual stats, here are the Top Ten most popular stories this ñewsweek on Pocho.com:

Mas…Ñewsweek: Gasbacks swarm MX, corporate cartoon capers caca

Mexican city bans Los Tigres for narcocorrido, actual narcos still OK

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(PNS reporting from CHIHUAHUA) The New York Times reports that Mexican super group Los Tigres del Norte, dubbed the Metallica of Norteño Music, has been banned from performing in the state Chihuahua after they sang one of their popular narcocorridos at a cattle expo in Ciudad Juárez.

The band began a heavy rendition of La Reina del Sur — which details the life and exploits of drug trafficking legend Sandra Avila Beltran — but were quickly escorted offstage by portly Federales armed with stale churros.

Juarez Chief of Police Feo B. Sonso says that the city doesn’t mind actual narcos and their beheading tactics so much as it does bandas singing about them.

“Bandas? We don need no steenking bandas!” Sonso said.

Mas…Mexican city bans Los Tigres for narcocorrido, actual narcos still OK

U.S. ‘gasbacks’ sneaking into Mexico for cheap fuel

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(PNS reporting from TIJUANA) Soaring prices at the pump are  sending Americans  to El Otro Lado for a break on pricey petrol purchases,  creating a furor over a new class of immigrants called “gasbacks.”

Mexican public opinion is all over map regarding the gas-guzzling gringos, who are pumping millions of dollares into Mexico by pumping millions of gallons of gas out of it.

Mas…U.S. ‘gasbacks’ sneaking into Mexico for cheap fuel

Pocho Ocho reasons gringos are scared to go to Mexico for gas

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While some gas-hungry Americans — gasbacks — are sneaking South of the Border to take advantage of lower fuel prices, others aren’t so sure. Here are the Pocho Ocho reasons gabachos don’t wanna go there:

8. They don’t want to get tucked and rolled.

7. Last time down there, a lengua burrito licked them back.

6. Mexican gas is stronger (Insert your own joke here.)

Mas…Pocho Ocho reasons gringos are scared to go to Mexico for gas

Ñewsweek: Lalo the valet, the gay GOP sheriff, fishsticks and boobs

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There’s a fine line between truth and satire, a twisty maze of passageways, all alike. POCHO was doing that line dance all week with these stories:

Sabado Pochonte Video: Welcome to 2040 on ‘The Other Side’

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Exterior, day: Destitute desert town in the year 2040. Audio: Spanish newsradio tells the story — unemployment is 86%, gangs are everywhere and food and water are getting scarce.

There’s only one thing a father can do — smuggle his family across the border to the prosperous country on The Other Side.

Mexico issues travel warning for Los United Estates

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L.A. jails Chicanos on the slightest pretext

(PNS reporting from MEXICO CITY) In the widest travel advisory since the Zoot Suit Riots of the 1940s, the Mexican government is recommending that Mexicans avoid travel to all or parts of the United States of America.

Mexico’s State Department has warned against any nonessential travel in all of California, Arizona, Texas and New Mexico as well as the entire South, including Florida.

The advisory issued Tuesday note that Mexican citizens have been victims of offically-sanctioned governmental racism, including scapegoating, false statistics and Jim Crow-era laws. It is the first time the Mexican government listed advisories for the entire United States.

Mas…Mexico issues travel warning for Los United Estates

Sabado Pochonte Video: Fred MacMurray, Claire Trevor, Raymond Burr and Nacho Galindo star in ‘Borderline’ (1950)

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This 1950 crime melodrama with humorous undertones involves the investigation of dope smugglers on the Mexican border. Americans Fred MacMurray and Claire Trevor enter the scene and find themselves embroiled in the illicit activities. Both are government agents, but each one thinks the other is a crook. The real bad guy is Raymond Burr, head of the smuggling ring. At one point, MacMurray and Trevor must pretend to be husband and wife, which weakens their mutual mistrust. Eventually, MacMurray and Trevor sort out the heroes from the villains, and the dope ring is scuttled…at least for the time being.  (from the YouTube page.)

Nacho Galindo? There’s a Google for that!

Rick Perry: Mexi-Klingon threat could require Viet troops

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(PNS reporting from NEW ENGLAND) As president, Rick Perry “would send troops back into Vietnam,” the Texas governor declared during Saturday’s presidential debate.

Blasting Pres. Barack Obama for letting Vietnam “just sit there,” Perry (R-TX) said the area is susceptible to a light-speed invasion from Mexican Klingons and possibly people who hate Christmas.

“Look, these people have the technology. I’ve seen it. I think the idea that we allow these Mexi-Klingons to come back into Vietnam and take over that country, with all of the treasure, both in blood and money, and uhm, one other thing, oh shit…well with all that we have spent there because this president wants to kowtow to his Borg leftist base…I think it is a huge mistake,” Perry said during the debate.

Mas…Rick Perry: Mexi-Klingon threat could require Viet troops

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