Student film? Bad Accent Video Theatre? Whatever! El Amor de Mi Amante is mini-telenovela brought to you by Taco Bell and this year’s hottest new fragrance — Twist!
PREVIOUSLY ON BAD SPANISH ACCENT VIDEO THEATRE:
Mas…Bad Accent Video Theatre: ‘El Amor de Mi Amante’ (My Lover’s Love)
Tired of the hassles of cleaning, maintaining (not to mention paying for) a big apartment, condo or home?
Looking for a just-built energy-efficient, traditionally-styled Aztlan adobe?
Getting back to basics is easy with this lovely Abiquiu, NM property which offers 86 square feet of solar-powered living space away from the noise, crime and confusion of urban life.
Owner-builder Samuel Gray explains:
Mas…Real Estate for Sale: New Mexico adobe casita best offer > $3000
I’m so sick of Christmas and December isn’t even a week old!
Every year it’s the same crap over and over again. I mean, I wasn’t even finished pretending not to eat Halloween candy before people started playing that Christmas music — don’t even get me started on the music! It’s like, let’s take a has-been artist and have them pump out some horrible tripe and force everyone to remember why they became irrelevant in the first place, all the while pretending like we’re enjoying the tunes.
You know, all those songs were written during a time when my grandparents weren’t even allowed to go into certain restaurants. “No Mexicans, No Dogs” is what the door signs used to say. “White Christmas” indeed!
Antônio Villas Boas reported that the space aliens kidnapped him from a field he was plowing, brought him aboard their UFO/OVNI, stripped him naked and then a female ET raped him. In 1957, this made him a pioneer — way before the Betty and Barney Hill were abducted in New England in 1961. NPR reports:
According to Villas Boas, he was plowing fields with his tractor when he was taken against his will by a group of ETs measuring about 5 feet tall. On their spaceship he was put in a room where he saw some kind of gas come out of the walls, making him sick. Then a very attractive female, naked, with long platinum-blonde hair, fire-red pubic hair and deep-blue cat eyes, came to him and forced him to have intercourse….
Mas…Was Brazil’s Antônio Villas Boas the first UFO abductee? (video)
Coincidence? Copyright violation? The blockbuster film Gravity – with Sandra Bullock and George Clooney – may not be as original as we’ve been led to believe. Check out the 1966 trailer for the Mexican movie Gravedad.
A potentially dangerous burrito put the bomb squad of the Oklahoma City police on alert last week. NewsOK has the story:
A man brought a Thermos-type container into the Santa Fe Briefing Station, 9000 S Santa Fe Ave., on Thursday afternoon. The man said he found the container on his lawn and noticed tinfoil showing out of the lid, police Capt. Dexter Nelson said.
Officers told the man to leave the container outside and the police bomb squad X-rayed the item, Nelson said.
Authorities were cautious of the item because of how heavy the container was and the tinfoil protruding from the lid.
The suspicious thermos payload turned out to be a burrito, Nelson said.
Mas…OK City police bomb squad X-rays burrito, decides it’s safe
Australian comic Aamer Rahman — half of Fear of A Brown Planet — discusses the pitfalls of trying to joke about race, color and ethnicity.
PREVIOUSLY ON MAKING FUN OF WHITE PEOPLE:
Mas…Aamer Rahman: What’s the deal with white people? (video)
Madrid, Spain, had a caca de perro problem, until they started rubbing the dog owners’ faces in it.
PREVIOUSLY ON POCHO PERROS:
Hola. Is Tia Lencha here.
Ju want to give presens to eberyone on your Chrismas list or Chanukah or Kwanzaa or Reyes Magos or Chinese Year but ju are short on dinero? No worry! Tia Lencha is going to give ju recipe for to make the oven roast red salsa!
Is nice! Is a good gift for the peoples! And is easy! No like making mole for Turkey Day.
I make this salsa to give to my comadres and the lob it. They have little hearts in their eyes when they see my salsa. They eat with almost eberything. They say they fight their childrens and viejos to eat the last drops of it in the jar. Is that good. Oso, it don’t matter if the peoples are no Mexican. The peoples at my job are no Mexican and they ask me for the salsa.
Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: Roasted red Chanukah Christmas Kwanzaa salsa
POCHO Jefe-in-Chief Lalo Alcaraz and POCHO Migrant Editor Al Madrigal (you may also know him from The Daily Show with Juan Estewart) are thankful for lots of stuff. Al is thankful that his son’s school’s athletic mascot is not racist, Lalo is thankful for his new Bordertown gig with Fox, and POCHO is thankful LatinoUSA with Maria Hinojosa let us share this audio from everyone’s favorite Latinos from the Future!
PREVIOUSLY ON LATINOS FROM THE FUTURE:
Mas…LatinoUSA Audio: Al Madrigal and Lalo Alcaraz’ ‘Big Adventure’
POCHO’s Especial Correspondents spread out across America to celebrate Thanksgiving and sent in notes about their day. Some names were changed to avoid unpredictable results. Read their stories and share your own in the comments!
Mas…POCHO Estaff Reports: Mi casa? Real Thanksgiving turkeys!
Hurricane Marco Rubio is headed up the East Coast, bringing havoc and destruction wherever he makes landfall.
When you’ve got a lot left over, you need a big beautiful burrito! Jerry Springer reports.
Kids today need to learn to respect others, and Mr. T explains why.
PREVIOUSLY ON KEY & PEELE:
Mas…Key & Peele: Mr. T has a PSA for you about respect (video)
See this painting that is supposed to depict the first Thanksgiving? It’s wrong wrong wrong. What really went on at that epic feast so long ago?
We’ve got eight things right here:
8. The frozen string beans in the casserole were past their sell-by date
7. Pilgrim Zephaniah Winslow = silent but deadly
6. Squanto’s succotash was really takeout from Naco Bell
Eddie Gee (@omgitseddieg on the Twitter) is all about the pochismo and explains why. Don’t miss the quick graphic shoutout to POCHO Jefe-in-Chief Lalo Alcaraz.
PREVIOUSLY ON SOY POCHO:
Beat icon, literary treasure, junkie, poet and provocateur William S. Burroughs offered this Thanksgiving Prayer in 1986. You don’t know Burroughs? His most famous book was Naked Lunch, and Wikipedia says he specialized in satire and “paranoid fiction.” (NSFW language.)
Les Nessman reporting, live!
I can see it now — the WKRP Holiday Helicopter is coming in low over Cincinnati!
The signature foods of Chanukah, which begins tonight, are potato latkes — as prepared by Hebrew homeboys Jaquann and Luis — and sufganiyot, Israeli-style donuts. Both foods, tu sabes, are fried in oil, commemorating the milagro at the heart of the Chanukah story.
Which is why, two years ago, before we thought of Mexican Turducken-style gag dishes we could attribute to Rick Bayless, Mexikosher chef (and Chopped winner) Katsuji Tanabe created a nopales and kosher carnitas burrito stuffed inside a donut/sufganiyot. Really.
Happy Chanukah the Hip Hop Hoodíos! The Jewish Festival of Lights begins at sunset tonight and ends at sunset on December 5: Ocho noches, ocho kandelikas.
Mas…Hip Hop Hoodíos light ‘Ocho Kandelikas’ for Chanukah (video)
The Jewish holiday of Chanukah חנוכה starts Wednesday night, so Hebrew hermanos Jaquann and Luis prepare potato latkes (pancakes) one of the season’s signature treats. This year Chanukah and Thanksgiving coincide, so all the Pochodores wish you a Gobble Tov! (Totally NSFW adult language.)
PREVIOUSLY ON HOMEBOY HEBREWS:
Mas…Hebrew homeboys make Chanukah potato latkes (NSFW video)
Hola. Is Tia Lencha here. Sorry I no give ju recetas (recipes for ju pochos) for a gwhile. I was closed like the gobernment. Mijo’s daddy no send the cheques for the mijo support. I mad.
Then he go to my house crying because the eskelton eskank he marry left him for another viejo (old man for ju pochos). The viejo had more dinero and drive a troka (thas truck for ju pochos) with plastic bolitas hanging from the bumper. Oh gwell.
In Mexico we say mijo’s daddy got put horns. Mijo’s daddy cry and cry but he no give me my mijo support cheque. I tell him my house is no LenchaCare. He need to pay. He say need money for divorce the eskank. I have to go to the offices to get him to pay.
Mas…Tia Lencha’s Cocina: How I make turkey in Mole Poblano for mijo
Mexican revolutionary hero Emiliano Zapata shows off his new look in an oil painting posted on Facebook by artist Cahirez Ch.
Must be something in the air! Frida Kahlo just got a makeover too.
PREVIOUSLY ON EMILIANO ZAPATA:
Mas…Emiliano Zapata gets a new look in ‘Revolución’ (NSFW toon)
Did a trail cam in Bangor, Maine photograph the elusive, mythical goat-sucking Mexican monster known as the Chimichanga?
That’s the question on the front page of the Bangor Daily News.
It’s not a typo, according JimRomenesko.com:
Mas…Trail cam in Maine captures mystery Chimichanga beast? (photo)
Ooops, we’re being heteronormative with “mujeres” in the headline. Pochas y pochos! You too can have hair and makeup like the esteemed feminist and artist including the iconic monobrow (AKA unibrow) and mustache (AKA bigote.)
PREVIOUSLY ON FRIDA KAHLO:
Mas…Mujeres: How to do your hair and makeup like Frida Kahlo (video)
